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How NOT to die.


Stuffie

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I do not enjoy death, but I somehow ended up on the Wikipedia page for a list of unusual deaths throughout known mankind history.

Some of these are tragic,
some of these are disgusting,
and some are downwhat crazy and unbelievable,
but some of these are just too ironically funny and unbelievable to be taken serious.

You in? Then open the spoiler, read up and hopefully enjoy/get :eek: eyes:

  • 892: Sigurd the Mighty of Orkney strapped the head of his defeated foe, Máel Brigte, to his horse's saddle. The teeth of the head grazed against his leg as he rode, causing a fatal infection.
  • 1567: Hans Steininger, the burgomaster of Braunau (then Bavaria, now Austria), died when he broke his neck by tripping over his own beard. The beard, which was 4.5 feet (1.4 m) long at the time, was usually kept rolled up in a leather pouch.
  • 1854: William Snyder, a 13 year old, died when a circus clown swung him around by his heels.
  • 1871: Clement Vallandigham, a lawyer and Ohio, U.S., politician defending a man on a charge of murder, accidentally shot himself demonstrating how the victim might have shot himself while in the process of drawing a weapon when standing from a kneeling position. Though the defendant, Thomas McGehan, was ultimately cleared, Vallandigham died from his wound.
  • 1974: Basil Brown, a 48-year-old health food advocate from Croydon, England, drank himself to death by consuming 10 gallons (38 litres) of carrot juice in ten days, causing him to overdose on vitamin A and suffer severe liver damage.
  • 1983: Dick Wertheim was an American tennis linesman who suffered a fatal injury on September 10, 1983, during a match at the 1983 US Open. Wertheim's fatal injury occurred after Stefan Edberg sent an errant serve directly into his groin. Wertheim had been sitting in a chair and officiating at the center line when the blow knocked him backward. He fell out of the chair and onto the hardcourt surface, striking his head.
  • 1993: Garry Hoy, a 38-year-old lawyer in Toronto, Canada, fell to his death on 9 July 1993 after he threw himself against a window on the 24th floor of the Toronto-Dominion Centre in an attempt to prove to a group of visitors that the glass was "unbreakable", a demonstration he had done many times before. The glass did not break, but popped out of the window frame, and Hoy fell to his death.
  • 2001: Peter Robinson, a New Zealander, 28, from Reefton, Buller District, West Coast, South Island, died after he fell on ice and drowned in his cat's water bowl. This death was depicted in an episode of the series 1000 Ways to Die.
  • 2006: Steve Irwin, the international celebrity known as the "Crocodile Hunter," died from being pierced hundreds of times in a few seconds by the barb of an 8-foot (2.4 m) stingray in chest-deep water, just as he and his cameraman were filming the final shot of the stingray swimming away from them.
  • 2012: Geoffrey Haywood, 65, pretended to be blind for pity. One day, he fell into a ditch and died. He apparently did not see it.
  • 2013: Takuya Nagaya, 23, from Japan, started to slither on the floor and claim he had become a snake. His mother took this to mean that he had been possessed by a snake, and called for her husband, 53-year-old Katsumi Nagaya. Katsumi spent the next two days head-butting and biting his son "to drive [out] the snake that had possessed him" but instead causing his death.
  • 2013: 45-year-old João Maria de Souza was crushed by a cow falling through the roof of his home in Caratinga, Brazil (the cow having climbed onto the roof from an adjacent hillside). His wife (who was lying in bed next to him) and the cow were both unharmed.

    Source:
 

ToxicShock

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Re: How NOT to die.

Mithridates VI (whose father, Mithridates V, was poisoned) was captured in a rebellion and tried to poison himself, but was immune to it after immunizing himself to poisons so he wouldn't be poisoned by his enemies.
 
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Stuffie

Stuffie

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Re: How NOT to die.

Mithridates VI (whose father, Mithridates V, was poisoned) was captured in a rebellion and tried to poison himself, but was immune to it after immunizing himself to poisons so he wouldn't be poisoned by his enemies.
B-but that's not what the...what the Wiki page says.... ._.

*"think of the positive rep, Stuffie, think of it!*

......OMG yes Toxic, you're right! Oh my f***ing God, he was not poisoned by........eh.....what? Wait, what is this......eh? "He tried to poison himself, but was immune to it after immunizing himself to poisons so he wouldn't be poisoned by his enemies."? Eeeeh uuh, goddamnit Toxic, you are ruining this!!
 
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Mr NunSense

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Re: How NOT to die.

Quote from wikipedia:
On 15 April 1984 the comedian and ilusionist Tommy Cooper collapsed from a heart attack in front of millions of television viewers, midway through his act on the London Weekend Television variety show Live from Her Majesty's, transmitted live from Her Majesty's Theatre.

An assistant had helped him put on a cloak for his sketch, while Jimmy Tarbuck, the host, was hiding behind the curtain waiting to pass him different props that he would then appear to pull from inside his gown. The assistant smiled at him as he collapsed, believing that it was a part of the act. Likewise, the audience gave "uproarious" laughter as he fell, gasping for air.

As a true comedian he made others happy till he's last momments eh?
 
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Stuffie

Stuffie

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Re: How NOT to die.

As a true comedian he made others happy till he's last momments eh?
Like I said: Some of these deaths are (both) macabre and unresistable to laugh at. :p
 

Mr NunSense

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Re: How NOT to die.

Well i got something else. The guy who had this accident acctually "survived" (i know i know, stop booing me) but he received a "Darvin's award" for his deed so i think it's worth to post here. Especially cause of the "form" of the letter he wrote.(Im translating this from mine's so"bear"with me). Here we go...

A Prosecutors Office in Szczecin (Poland) was investigating some case regarding "the posibility that the employer neglected health and safety regulations on one of the building sites".
They received 2 letters (1st very vague) and second explaining exactly the accident written by the victim, local bricklayer.

The letter says:
In the day of the accident i was working alone on the roof of 3 floors high building. When i finished my work i realized i had 150kg(approx 23,5stone) bricks left scatered arround me. Instead of caring them down one by one i decided to load all the bricks in a barrel and take them down by using the line with this or simmilar looking device attached to the wall.
I went downstairs to secure the line, went back on the roof and hanged the barrel on the line, went downstairs again and loosened the line while holding her tightly with all my might tried to slowly let the barrel descend.
In my accident report i stated that i weight 80kg (12,5 stone approx).
You can dear sir/madam imagine my BIG SURPRISE when i felt a sharp pull upwards- i became disoriented at the same momment but didn't lost my grip on the line so i been moving up over the wall in a "rather fast manner".
In the middle of the second floor i've meet with the barrel which explains my cracked skull and broken collarbone.
Because of that i decreased my upward travel speed slightly but still ascended until my right hands bones got mauled into the device on the top (the photo you all seen in the link)
Fortunately i was still conscious and even when feeling huge pain from sustained injuries managed to still hold onto the line.
At the same momment the barrel meet the floor with massive impact.
Because of that her bottom been damaged and the content fell out through it.
A barrel without the bricks weighted only 25kg so i abruptly started falling down... and meet the ascending this time barrel again in the middle on the second floor. In effect i've received lacerations and cracked ankle bones.
That "meeting" slowed down my fall considerably so i sustained lessened injuries while landing on the bricks. Only three broken ribs.
Unfortunately i need to add that when i was lying down on them bricks,hurt, unable to move, to stand up i stoped thinking logically and leet go of the line. Empty barrel weighting more than the line went down and broke my legs.
I hope dear sir/madam (prosecutor office) that i provided you with all the necessary information so we can end/close this investigation.
 
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