KaRV Session Transcripts (Edited)


Has a penis diamiter of 4.5cm
Nov 10, 2008
I'm cleaning up the session transcripts and posting them in a more polished (readable) form. I've taken the liberty of making some minor grammatical and spelling fixes, and removing a few of the more heinous redundancies.

First Session, 30 October (part one, the party and the cardinal meet, a tense peace negotiation begins):
DM: The tavern is crowded, but nowhere near as crowded as the streets outside. At first, there are no seats, but a table at the back corner opens up as a minor scuffle breaks out, and three dwarves are ejected by a large human in furs.

Anor gave a small stretch as he entered the tavern, his breastplate and the engraved phoenix gleaming in the firelight. Despite his readily apparent nature as a warrior, his weapons strapped to his back and belt were peace-tied and his bow was missing its string. He took a seat near an empty corner.

DM: The tavern is crowded, but Anor manages to claim the back corner table, recently vacated. A harried human barmaid, plump and curvy, stops by the table, her red hair slightly damp from her busy day. "Help you?"

Anor gave his scarred head a nod, "Just an ale, lass," handing her some coin to pay for it.

DM: The barmaid gives you a business-like smile, then hurries back to the kitchen. One of the dwarves at the bar leers at her, but due to his inebriated state his swipe misses her ass by yards.

Anor shakes his head as he awaits the barmaid return.

Bohzag: The door to the tavern swings open as a black-haired dwarf enters, stamping his feet and taking up a standing position near the hearth, his fur coat and hat covering much of his form, save for his travelling backpack and the musket hanging from a strap attached to it.

DM: Immediately behind the black-haired dwarf with the musket, another dwarf enters wearing a plain robe and hood. "Bohzag, I believe that armored gentleman at the corner table is another of the expedition candidates."

Anor looks up at the new arrivals, his eyes looking them over briefly.

Bohzag finishes warming his hands "Aye." he says, turning to walk towards the table, revealing the black eye-patch covering his left eye.

Gwynne: A moderately armored figure steps through the crowd and finally makes her way into the tavern. She makes no reservation of hiding her faith, wearing her holy symbol like a necklace and nor does she not hide behind a cloak or hood. Her most striking feature was her auburn hair. "This seems like the place...but where is the contact?"

Anor extends his hand to the one eyed dwarf. "Anor. Third son and heir of the Urthal Clan."

DM: The hooded figure orders ale for the group at the bar, joining the table and placing the drinks in front of the dwarves. Anor ends up with two drinks. "Gwynne, I presume?" The hooded dwarf looks in the newcomer's direction.

Bohzag extends his own hand to shake "Bohzag, second son of the Baumfaller family."

Gwynne: "Y...Yes sir. Forgive me for being so late." Gwynne quickly shakes the offered hand, still a little nervous from the looks of it.

Hooded Figure (DM): "Please, join us. There should be two more."

Gwynne: "Yessir."

Anor looked to the cleric. "My lady, Hello." He offers her a hand as well. "Anor. Third son and heir of the Urthal Clan. No need to be nervious here."

Gwynne as ordered takes one of the empty seats, leaning her mace and shield against a nearby wall, but leaving her sword on her waist. "Gwynne Coppereye. Loyal servant of our lady of war, Freya. Forgive me but this is the first time in a good while I've been outside my temples walls. And yes, my name makes little sense given my actual eye color.”

Gwynne shakes the other hand as well. "And as far as I can guess, I'm no heir or anything like that. I've been with the church as long as I remember."

Bohzag takes a pipe out of his coat and fills it, lighting it with a slight poof of smoke as he touches the tobacco with the match, before inhaling gently.

Anor gave a small nod. Turning to look at the man in the robe, "Are we all here?"

Hooded Figure (DM): "Should be one more. An angry skald, if I recall correctly."

Anor nodded, "Ah," drinking his first ale.

Gwynne: "A skald? Seems an interesting choice of companion for such a mission."

Bohzag puffs on his pipe "I'll not argue their value in battle. Though I recommend they be kept away from the Elvish *delegation.*" He scoffs, looking away from the group.

Gwynne: "I think that could be said for most of us. Those were...interesting years for my church. So many people coming in for aid."

Bohzag points to his eyepatch, not bothering to say anything else.

Anor gave a somber nod. "Aye, it was."

Gwynne: "I was still learning at the time. Getting my vestments, so to speak. I never saw the front—just the wounded."

Bohzag: "Shame, that. Might have been able to save my eye."

Hooded Figure (DM): "The delegation from the Elves has already arrived. They used magic to disguise themselves as dwarves, until they reached our subterranean hold. Right now they are waiting comfortably and being allowed to sample dwarven ales."

Anor chuckled. "They may wish to be careful or there might be a scene."

Gwynne: "I...I see."

Hooded Figure (DM): "There are three of them. The emissary is an elven prince. There was also a mage of some sort, and a bodyguard/servant."

Bohzag moves the band of the eyepatch aside, revealing a long scar leading from his eye back along his head and into his hair. "I've no sympathy for the Elves, myself. Weren't for them there'd not have been a war, or so many graves."

Anor nodded. "Neither do I. But we are doing this to keep the peace and prevent more bloodshed."

Gwynne: "I understand your hate, sir. No one enjoyed how that conflict played out. But if I may say, as a woman of faith, we can't let the anger get the better of us."

Alice: A tall female dwarf marches into the tavern, stopping shortly inside the entrance before pulling out a pocket watch and giving it a quick glance and looking bitter as she puts it away and then looking around the tavern for the party.

Bohzag scoffs, "They better keep up their end. I don't want to go home and find a bunch of knife-ears roaming free on my family's land."

Hooded Figure (DM): "That's as may be, but our recent negotiations have revealed that their attack on our keep was actually retaliation. Apparently a group of dwarves ransacked one of their temples and absconded with an artifact of some value. But I believe our skald has arrived." The brown, hooded dwarf motions Alice over to the corner table, a mug of ale waiting for her there.

Anor shook his head. "It likely won’t come to that, lad."

Bohzag: "If it does you can be assured that this musket's not for show." He points a thumb at the musket resting in its holster.

Gwynne: "I hope it doesn’t. Enough lives have been wasted on both sides of the isle."

Bohzag: "Well, enough besides one."

Bohzag rubs his scar gently as he puffs on his pipe.

Duvak: Just as such an inquiry was made as to if there was another expedition member, another dwarf would enter the bar... though not quite what was expected. Rather than a singer of tales common in mead halls, the dwarf that arrived stood out like a sore thumb to some extent, but at the same time...seemed to command an air of respect and authority to some extent. That dwarf in particular would be...tall, amongst its kind, easily half a head over even the other grizzled veterans in the room. A scar across his right eye, and the signs of physical strain and training seemed to denote him as a warrior, perhaps yet another soldier. However, at the same time, their attire seemed to imply otherwise. For while they indeed wore armor, it was far more...decorated than would ever be standard in military terms, odd strands of strings, beads, silk lining, pieces of stone ornating it and making it...distinct. Additionally, the man also carried no shield to complement their axe, which in itself...was again, odd, with odd runes of gold and silver carved into its handle here and there...ones similar to that which was carved upon a gold signet ring upon the dwarf's finger, but not quite the same.

Hooded Figure (DM): "First Sergeant Hirschmann, of the Skalds of Eisenberg, and Duvak Steelkin, also of Eisenberg. Please, come join us." The brown-hooded figure motions over the shaman and the skald.

Anor offered each newcomer a hand and introduced himself once again. "Anor. Third son and heir of the Urthal Clan."

Duvak: Regardless though, it'd be their behavior that'd make it most clear that they weren't simply more disgruntled rabble from the streets, as just as soon as the dwarf entered, a cigar held between his teeth, he'd narrow his eyes and begin looking about with an almost alarming degree of scrutiny, as if he was appraising each creature that entered his field of view...stopping only upon hearing his name mentioned. In which he gruffly approaches the group that had already gathered...far from perhaps the friendliest expression even in greeting.

Gwynne could not help but feel out of place amongst all the grizzled military veterans and people of war and military service and that all she accomplished in her 72 years was read scripture, heal people and provide verbal comfort to the sick. Far from the heroes she sat with.

Bohzag puffs his pipe and nods in greeting to the newcomers.

Duvak: "...Sergant Hirschmann, Anor of Clan Urthal...Bohzag of the Baumfaller family? I take it then that I am in the right place?"

Alice accompanies Duvak to the table and takes her seat.

Anor gave a nod. "Seems that way."

Bohzag: "Aye. We're just talking about the axes we have to grind with the Elves."

Gwynne: "Sister Gwynne. Servant of our Lady of War, Freya. An honor to meet you both."

Hooded Figure (DM): "You are all in precisely the right place. I am Cardinal Mengelberg, a paladin sworn to the service of Heimdall, and owing worldly allegiance to the Duchess of Axtkopf. As soon as we've finished our ales, we will head below to attend the signing of the peace accords with the elves."

Duvak: Upon closer inspection, it seems that rather than again, being a proper military uniform...or attire, Duvak's outfit seems to be more a mix between both what an officer and an aristocrat might wear, Bearing odd things like, pockets and gold buttons in unusual locations, and a space from which there seems to be an endless supply of items necessary for the rather...foul, cigars the dwarf smoked. And to the greetings, his response, while not hostile is far from kind. Merely a grunt and a nod of acknowledgement.

DM: The cardinal finishes off his ale and gives a hearty belch of appreciation.

Gwynne: "I'm ready whenever you all are. Would just need to grab my equipment. I'm not one for drinking while on duty at least."

Bohzag hasn't even touched his ale this entire time, rather he's been smoking his pipe

Gwynne: "No offense to you all of course!"

Anor nodded to their employer. "I am ready whenever you are."

Cardinal Mengelberg (DM): "Alright, please follow me." The cardinal leads the group towards the kitchen.

Alice glances at the ale, scoffs and then pulls out a canteen and taking a decent sip from it.

Bohzag nods, his pipe ceasing its smoke as he runs out of tobacco, tapping it out on the edge of an empty mug, before storing it and standing up to follow the others.

Anor raises an eyebrow at the odd route, but follows anyway.

Duvak: "...Peace accords." At the mention of those, there is a clear sign of...displeasure, though his actual speech would seem to imply grudging acceptance. "...Whatever must be done I suppose."

Gwynne grabs her gear and places her shield on her back while still holding her heavy mace in her hand. She'd follow the Cardinal without much question.

Alice stands up and follows the rest of the party.

DM: The Cardinal pulls back his hood and makes a gesture to something behind the party. The red-haired barmaid is standing there with a naked blade. Recognizing the cardinal, she sheathes her blade. "Friends, do not use this entry unless I am with you." The cardinal kneels and opens a trapdoor, then climbs down.

Anor frowns and gives a nod. "Okay."

Bohzag shifts his pack, waiting his turn to descend, trying to keep his musket pointed away from the people beneath him.

Duvak: As the group walks out toward the kitchen, Duvak would stop mid way... seeming to reignite his cigar...somehow by cupping the end in one hand. However, as he takes a long drown out puff, the smoke would seem to form a skull...and float back towards the threat he had noticed prior. But as soon as the Cardinal addresses it, the militant dwarf would simply shrug and continue following the others.

Anor proceeded down the ladder first. "So why the tunnel?"

Gwynne: "Yes. This does seem rather roundabout."

DM: The cardinal guides the group through a pitch-black tunnel. Occasionally he warns the party, "do not step here," or "duck as you pass this point." After a short time, you pass two reinforced doors. The first is labelled, "Elves." The second, "Dwarves." He produces a key and opens the dwarf door. "This tunnel gives figures of importance a direct route into the more secure areas of subterranean Axtkopf."

Anor gave a wary glance at the elven door. "I see."

Bohzag chuckles "Handy. At least we're making good time."

Cardinal Mengelberg (DM): "I must ask that you leave your weaponry, whether magical or not, within this chamber. The elven delegation has already been similarly disarmed, as have I." The paladin gestures at a corner where an ornate greataxe rests.

Anor nods and begins to remove his weapons and lay them next to the axe.

Bohzag takes the musket off of the holster on his back, setting it gently against the wall off on its own, with the muzzle pointed up just in case.

Cardinal Mengelberg (DM): "Oh, and don't touch the door labeled "elves." Their wizard placed some kind of spell on the door, with our permission. Something about a curse and a vast demon-worm devouring people. Catyrpelus, I think."

Gwynne: "Fair enough, sir." Gwynne made no objection as she left her mace, shield and sword with the axe. "Seems a rather extravagant curse to put on a door."

Bohzag: "You've not seen how thorough they are on the battlefield."

Alice does as commanded and places her greataxe on the table along with her backpack.

Duvak raises an eyebrow at this, as if...amused even at the notion that simply removing his axe would prevent him from slaughtering the elves as they had done the dwarves at the keep. However, with a shurg, he then gingerly upholsters the unwieldy axe and lays it there... instead, taking a moment to "crack" gauntleted hands.

Gwynne: "And I'd rather leave it like that, thank you. I'm trying not to think about that."

Duvak: "...If the elves believe that simply taking away our axes will stop their spines from snapping at the first instance of treachery... well, then perhaps they are in need of...enlightenment."

Bohzag: "I'm all for killin' 'em, but that's a decision we're not meant to make."

Cardinal Mengelberg (DM): "I trust that you will all keep your heads around the elves. I can respect your hatred after this bloody war, but this peace is vital, if the dwarven people are to recover. Although, obviously, if they do attempt some manner of villainy here, they will not survive the attempt."

Anor gave a nod at the paladin's words.

Gwynne: "Father, if I may be so bold, I think it would be best to allow me to speak with you if you need assistance. Calmer minds and voices need to be front and center today." Gwynne spoke with no hesitation or reservation, seeing and hearing the words of her zealous companions.

Cardinal Mengelberg (DM): "I appreciate the offer, but even I will say little in this meeting. Our Duke and Duchess of Eisenberg and Axtkopf will be doing most of the talking. And the human representative, Lord Darby."

Duvak: "...Of course. I am here today to see to it, that sufficient time for the Dwarven people to grow once again is attained. I will lower my head as necessary for now..."

Gwynne: "Forgive me. I was not aware the lords and lady would be present for the negotiations. I was believed that you'd be speaking. Forgive my ignorance."

Bohzag nods, crossing his arms and waiting for the others to finish talking.

Anor nods. "Shall we?"

DM: The cardinal smiles. "There is nothing to forgive. In this matter, I am merely a bishop. And we shall, yes." The cardinal securely locks the door once the party leaves the holding room, then leads the party through a set of intersections.

Anor follows along quietly.

Bohzag follows, stroking his beard in thought.

Gwynne also holds her tongue as well, instead playing with the holy symbol around her neck.

DM: The party enters a large, empty council chamber. The banners of several major and minor dwarven families hang around the circular chamber. In the center are six chairs, arranged in two rows of three, facing each other. There are several chairs set up to the side, as well. The cardinal murmurs a few words to a guard, who leads the group to the side chairs. In one of the rows of chairs, a human, a female dwarf, and a male dwarf are having a spirited discussion. The human is clearly agitated.

Alice: Alice steadily marches after the rest, pulling out her canteen again and taking another sip before putting it away again.

Duvak takes another draught from his cigar... but then suddenly clicks his tongue as a strange... lizard-like creature crawls out from one of his pockets, onto his shoulder... a pale green, strange reptilian thing, that is just a bit hard to put one's finger on. Though it seems friendly enough!...If not for the fact it's fangs dripped green stuff every now and then.

Bohzag claims a chair, hefting one leg up to rest on the other knee.

Gwynne takes a side seat as well, being respectful towards the arrival of the nobility. Hardly the place of a woman of the cloth to interrupt such people.

Anor moves over to sit down in one of the chairs off to the side. Interested to see what happens next.

Human Representative (DM): "...forgive me, your Graces, but I cannot accept that the Heroine of the Siege of Easterleigh is or ever was a coward! She proved her worth in battle, before our eyes, as she laid waste to the beseiging elven army! The Council of Easterleigh will not take this news well!" The human protests.

Duvak however doesn't seem to pay mind to the lizard too much after that, and ops to take a seat as far as is proper for well... aristocrat esque individuals, without actually being nobility.

DM: The dwarven female, sitting in the center chair of the row, turns to face the human. "I agree with your Excellence in this matter, Lord Darby, but it is not my decision to make. The people of Axtkopf would surely have fallen to elven blades, were it not for the general's sound judgement in this matter."

DM: The male dwarf rises slowly, his rage barely contained and his face red. "I am the DUKE of EISENBERG. I will not have you, or you, or ANY of you question the appointments and dismissals within my sovereign realm. The general has been dismissed from my service and my family, following her cowardly behavior. My councilors and I are in agreement--she lost this war for us."

Alice takes her seat after sending a salute towards her Duke, whether he is looking or not.

DM: The argument is interrupted as the cardinal moves forward. "Your Graces and Your Excellency, this is the expeditionary force, come to witness the signing of the peace accords. Ah, and the elves are arriving, as well." The Duke of Eisenberg gives a curt nod to Alice, acknowledging the veteran.

Gwynne could not stand to see such bickering among what was supposed to be friends, but she was afraid to speak up as well. She wasn't sure the words of a simple cleric would sway them.

Bohzag maintains his seat, his one good eye fixed on the Duke.

DM: Three white-robed figures enter. As with all the elves, their garb covers every part of their body except for the eyes. Before today, most dwarves, including the party, have only seen dead elves unhooded.

Anor stands to give the delegation a small bow.

Duvak silently nods at this statement, giving a brief glance of approval at the Duke, as he procures yet another cigar...a fresh one for the meeting, cupping the end with a hand as sparks from...somewhere seem to cause it to light. However that brief pleasant "mood" seems to fade as his eyes are then focused completely on the elves.

Bohzag tries his best to smile at the delegation, not bothering to stand.

DM: The three elves come to stand before the opposite three chairs, and the dwarven duchess and human lord rise to stand beside the duke. The six give slight bows. The elves remove their hoods, revealing smooth, pale faces draped by white hair.

Gwynne provides a simple nod and a quick prayer, wishing the delegation well and that they speak in wisdom instead of anger. All this was done in celestial, so that her god could better hear her.

DM: The figure in the center wears a small silver circlet on his brow, and stands six inches taller than the others. His left ear, however, is disfigured in a way that suggests a musket blast. It has healed, but with major scarring.

Bohzag uncrosses his arms, his jaw seeming to hang open like a bear trap.

DM: The figure in the center and the one on the right wear bright metal armor, mithral-make. The one on the left, closest to the party, wears only a white robe.

Anor frowns as he notices the elf's mangled ear. Hoping that it wasn't Bohzag who did it.

Bohzag rises slowly to his feet, his left hand pressing againt the scar on the side of his head, as his expression hardens into one of anger.

DM: The center elf murmurs a few words in elven to the armored elf on the right. The elf on the right has handsome, rugged features and a streak of black hair in with the white. The right-hand elf nods and speaks in broken Dwarven.

Duvak takes another draught of his cigar...taking care to not let...too much displeasure show with regard to the presence of the elves. Though he can't help but..."clack" the metallic joints of his gauntlet over and over again.

Elven Translator (DM): "Greetings. May I... present... the Crown Prince, Jahanyar Mahijarani, the fleet-footed and eagle-eyed. He conveys his greeting to Your... ((stumbling over the Dwarven tongue)) Your Graces and Your Excellence."

Alice takes a quick glance towards the elves and tries her best to maintain her composure, taking note of Bohzag's behavior.

Gwynne made a few quick glances over to her companions, noting the different reactions to the elves; Bohzag seemed somewhat nervous and angry and Duvak was hiding his displeasure. All and all, the air was tense. Her party alone was very on edge. But she remained strong—she had to.

DM: The Cardinal, bowing, moves to stand closer to the party and out of the negotiation. The Duchess responds to the delegation in Elven, with apparent difficulty.

Bohzag has his right hand clenched into what one would assume a very tight fist as he stares daggers at the elf with the missing ear.

Alice pays close attention to the conversation, despite it being partially in elven.

Duvak opts to mask a...less than pleasant comment with another puff of smoke, "...It would be easier for all parties if they simply spoke in the common tongue..."

DM: The negotiations are a mere formality. The elves thank the dwarves for the return of a sacred relic (in Dwarven). The duchess thanks the elves for the return of prisoners of war (in Elven, but the Cardinal translates for the party in a hushed tone). The elves explain that they have vacated the Keep and the Red Valley, and offer them to the dwarves as a token of peace between the dwarves, the humans, and the elves (In Dwarven, with substantial difficulty). The duchess thanks the elves and points out the expeditionary party to the elves (in Elven).
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Has a penis diamiter of 4.5cm
Nov 10, 2008
Re: KaRV Session Transcripts (Edited)

First Session, 30 October (part two, Bohzag keeps the peace, the party is given a quest and prepares for departure from Axtkopf):
DM: The Elven prince notes the standing Bohzag, and for his composure breaks for a split second, as he is surprised. He recovers quickly, returning to an impassive expression. He says a few words to his translator. The translator turns to the duchess, indicating Bohzag. "Who is this dwarf that... regards... his Highness with such... hate?"

DM: The Duchess of Axtkopf looks at Bohzag, then answers the elf in Dwarven.. "Please tell his Highness that the gentleman here is a veteran of the bloody war between us, and one who still bears its scars."

Bohzag growls, before reaching up and flipping up his eyepatch, to reveal the empty socket and scar along his head for the prince to see, before lowering it back and taking his seat.

Duchess Schönfeld (DM): "His name is Bohzag Baumfaller."

DM: The translator and prince exchange words in what seems to be a rather serious discussion for a few moments. The translator addresses Bohzag directly. "The prince wishes you to know that he regards you as a worthy opponent in war and one who could be a honorable friend in peace. However, as a warrior, he wishes to recognize your right to satisfy your honor in blood, if peace will not satisfy you."

Alice silently gives a small chuckle after hearing the Elven conversation.

Bohzag crosses his arms, looking at the translator, then at the prince, then at the Duchess, then back to the prince. "I will not do anything that might jeopardize this peace. I would sooner see my honor lost to me, than see another war." He speaks in Dwarven.

Gwynne could see the rising tension in the air and was growing more nervous by the minute. Thankfully, cooler heads prevailed and she would keep silent.

Anor nods upon hearing Bohzag's words. Happy that the other dwarf was able to about the people who would be harmed had he fought the prince.

DM: The translator nods, translating for the prince, than says, "The Prince commends you on your duty." The negotiations resume briefly with pleasantaries and much bowing. After a short time, the elven delegation bows again and dons their hoods. They are ushered out by respectful dwarven guards. The dwarven nobles and human lord slump into their seats.

Bohzag slumps back in his seat, sighing.

DM: The Duke regards the party. "We have commissioned you five admirable dwarves to travel to the keep, and ascertain that the elves have indeed left. Following the successful occupation of the keep, you will each receive a sum of two-thousand gold pieces from our joint war treasury. Do any of you have questions regarding this mission?"

Bohzag: "Aye. Are there any indigenous races that live in the area? Goblins, orcs, Giants?"

Anor gave a nod. "Yes. Should the keep be occupied by elves, what would you have us do?"

DM: "Yes. The hills are known to have orcs, gnolls, goblins, hobgoblins, even bugbears and trolls. Further west, in the marsh, are lizardfolk, though we have not known them to be hostile. Should the elves still hold the fort... then you'd better come back here. I doubt the five of you could lay siege properly, though I've no doubts as to your efficiency in combat."

Anor nods. “Anything you can tell us of the keep? Any maps of it and, or the area?"

Gwynne: "No we couldn't. But after holding up our end, it would be hypocritical for them not to hold up theirs. I doubt they would want their image tarnished further."

DM: "Actually, Duvak is probably our best expert on the keep. He IS a former resident."

Duvak would nod at this, grinding out the cigar now that the...elves are gone. "Indeed, the keep was once my home, as well as that of many others. However... that was before the war started. What's become of it now that it's been in the hands of pale skinned heathens... well. that remains to be seen."

Anor nodded. "Ah. Still, anything we should be aware of or look out for?"

DM: The duchess speaks up, "We suspect that the elves have taken decent care of the keep during their occupation of it, at least if the reports from the... former general... are to be believed."

Anor looked dubious. "You don't sound so sure of the general's reports?"

Duchess Schönfeld (DM): "Keep an eye out for anything and anyone. Our economy has suffered through this war, and renewed trade along the White River is vital. As for the former general, I believe firmly in her quality. But you could hear for yourselves that my opinion could not save her career or honor." The duchess shoots the duke a sharp glance, which he returns with a growl.

Bohzag: "Shame that. If she hadn't retreated we might not even be here today."

Anor gave a small nod. "Alright." He looked at his future companions to see if they had any questions.

Gwynne: "Well, you have faith in her and thats the least she can ask for. But until we see it for ourselves, we can't be certain of anything."

Bohzag speaks rather matter-of-factly, showing just how little he cared for the Duke's opinions on the general.

Duvak: "I wonder that. If circumstance had dictated that five thousand dwarves were the difference between total conquest and our...surrender, then it'd be the other way around."

Gwynne: "What's done is done. Can we please move on to something else? You'll have time to play strategist when we actually get to the fort."

DM: The duke reddens a little more, but he takes a breath. "Oh, and there is one more thing: we are sending another dwarf with you. Morna Lauer, step forth." A blonde-haired dwarven woman, dressed in rich but drab fabrics, steps in from the edges of the chamber where she was hidden in the shadows.

Duvak picks himself up from his chair, taking a moment to straighten his...regalia, as it were to stand. "Fair enough. I simply saw the need to correct...common misconceptions held by sympathizers and compromisers."

Anor gives the new arrival a careful looking over. Seeing what use she might offer to them as a whole.

Gwynne: "May I be so bold as to ask what our new companion is being brought on board for?

Bohzag eyes the woman up and down, his right eyebrow raising questioningly.

Duke Reinhardt (DM): "Morna is a talented individual who happens to be an expert on stonecrafting. She will accompany you in your expedition, then return to the duchess with requisitions. The elves may have maintained things, but they are NOT dwarven stonecutters. And, apologies to your Excellency, but we will want to bring this structure up to dwarven building standards."

Anor nods. "I take it we are to escort her back as well?"

Duke Reinhardt (DM): "Shouldn't be necessary. We'll need you to hold the fort. A small team of dwarves will follow a few days behind you, and they will accompany Morna back to Axtkopf."

Anor nods to the duke. "Alright."

Duvak: Finishing his...appraisal of the woman, and the reasoning behind her presence, the militaristic dwarf nods in approval surprisingly enough. "...A sound decision indeed. Better yet, we can make the structure less scalable by...trespassers. And perhaps avoid having our ballistae capable of being pivoted towards our own people, with a skilled enough sister of stone. That would be preferable, to say the least... But more on that once we actually arrive."

Duke Reinhardt (DM): "That was our thinking, as well. Plus, we eventually mean to install proper dwarven bombards at some point."

Gwynne: "All well and good then."

Anor nods to the pair. "Will we be returning to the tavern?"

Bohzag smirks at the mention of bombards.

DM: The cardinal speaks, "Well. If there's nothing else, let's retrieve our equipment and then I will see you six out by the same way we entered. Be careful whom you speak to in Axtkopf--not all of our residents are happy with the peace."

Anor simply shook his head.

Bohzag nods his head at the cardinal, rather eager to get his gun back.

Gwynne too nodded and stood herself up, still gripping her holy symbol.

DM: After all the pleasantries and bowing associated with nobility, the group heads back through the tunnels the same way, retrieving their equipment along the route. The "elves" door has already been opened when the party arrives. As before, the cardinal warns the party of the various traps in the tunnel, though they seem to have moved somewhat. "Duck here." "Don't step there." The group emerges in the tavern, with the cardinal leading the way. Once again, he gestures to the red-haired, buxom barmaid, who once again sheathes her blade.

Anor follows along quietly, hoping his companion hasn't hurt anyone. Looking to the others curiously, "Ready to leave now?"

Bohzag nods, after claiming his musket once more and ensuring nobody had touched it in his absence.

Gwynne grabbing her gear and putting each piece in the proper place, Gwynne would nod at Anor, “Ready as I'll ever be.”

DM: A rather bellicose dwarf is ranting about the elves, tears running down his scarred face. The skald recognizes the traumatized dwarf as a war veteran.

Alice: Alice dons her backpack and gently picks up her greataxe, a small smirk briefly on her face.

DM: A burly human moves to eject the screaming dwarf from the bar by way of the back alley. A small scuffle ensues, and the dwarf stumbles into Duvak's arms, reeking of cheap spirits.

Anor starts towards the tavern door. Hoping a fight doesn't break out in the common room.

DM: The human apologizes to Duvak, then grabs the dwarf and tosses him unceremoniously out the back door.

Gwynne: "Lets see....pack...shield...mace...sword...Yup everything here." Gwynne was busy reciting her checklist as the scuffle began but it thankfully ended quickly.

Duvak stops for a moment as the dwarf is thrown into him, not seeming phased by the impact, but rather just catching the poor drunken fool and setting him straight... However, his mouth quickly curls into a frown as something's picked up from the...babble. Enough so that after shooting a glare at the human that threw the dwarf out of the tavern, he pulls out another cigar to use as a cover while making a comment on what he had heard. "...The word of a drunkard is...interesting at times. Occasionally, enough truth comes out from ale induced hallucinations, that it's best for weapons to be kept sharp or readied."

DM: Morna frowns at Duvak. "The drunkard spoke to you?"

Duvak: "...If you could call it that. Yes."

DM: Morna glances out the back door. "Well, he's not there anymore."

Duvak takes a long draught... puffing out smoke which takes the shape of a bird. "A drunkard who's able to hobble away quickly... Was he simply a veteran drunk on the past? Or has he visited the keep recently?... We'll see I suppose. " The smoke of the bird then changes...as what appears to be a mountain cat of some sorts in the smoke pounces on it, and tears it apart before the smoke fades altogether.

DM: Morna follows Anor out.

Duvak: "...Either way, united, no Dwarf needs fear any foe."

Bohzag scoffs, "There's only one foe I fear. And I stared him down in that chamber."

DM: The crowd in the streets is thinner than it was before, as some have come to the realization that the elves may or may not be seen. Rumors abound about the elves and their foul practices of incest and making feasts out of dwarven babies. Utter nonsense, but commonly bandied about as fact over ale.

Anor approaches an equally as ugly, but large and muscular horse. The horse is wearing padded leather and chainmail armor. The padding hangs to his knees and is black with a white phoenix on the side in plain view. Anor shook his head as the horse grunted. "I know I took too long. Here, to make it up to you." Giving the horse a small honey candy which the horse ate after a harrumph.

DM: Morna grins at Bohzag. "I speak a little elven. Their darling prince wanted to fight you, but his translator talked him out of it. Duty, and whatnot."

Duvak: "...There is much you could learn from our ancestors Bohzag. But that is what I am here to offer to this force, so fear not."

Bohzag laughs as he walks. "I'm not sure if I'm supposed to be comforted or angry that we both think alike."

Morna (DM): "I think you should both feel stupid, because you both care WAY too much about honor." The dwarven woman laughs.

Bohzag: "Honor's about all I have left besides my family. And I'm not cut out for logging."

Anor smiles at the three dwarves. "Honour is important to us as both warriors and dwarves Morna." Hopping up onto the brutish horse with ease. Oddly enough, the horse seems to be lacking both a bit and a bridle, and is lacking in any sort of reins.
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Has a penis diamiter of 4.5cm
Nov 10, 2008
Re: KaRV Session Transcripts (Edited)

I'm also removing most of the mechanics (die rolls, rules discussions, etc) from the transcripts.

Second Session, 13 November (part one, the party finds a stack of heads and an ominous message):
DM: Morna stops the party before they depart the city. "There's one more we need to meet. I've arranged for a guide, in the wilderness."

Anor nodded. "Another guide?"

Bohzag scoffs. "A Baumfaller never gets lost in the forest."

Morna (DM): "A specialist in these matters. Probably unnecessary, but I don't really know any of you, let alone your value in the wilds."

Anor nods. "Alright then. Guess we will follow your lead," mounting Bracken and guiding the ugly horse with his knees.

Morna (DM): "He'll meet us at the outer gates." Morna and the party continue on their way out of the city.

Bohzag trudges along after Morna, his hands gripping the straps of his backpack as he does so.

Anor pats Brackens neck as he plods along behind Morna.

Alice steadily marches along.

Silvereye: At the gates of the city, a short dwarf clad in leathers is leaning against the wall, his heavy backpack on the ground next to him as he rests his eyes, whistling quietly.

DM: Sentries salute the sergeant as the party passes through the inner city gates. The city proper is bounded by a high stone wall. Cattle and a few farmers dwell in the outer city, surrounded by a tall, double-layered palisade. The party sees the dwarf in leathers at the outer gates. Morna greets him. "Good to see you again, Silvereye. This is the rest of our expedition." She indicates the party.

Anor nods to the new dwarf. "Hello. I am Anor, Hier to the Urthal Clan."

Bohzag grunts "Bohzag." he says grumpily, his arms crossed.

Silvereye opens his eyes and waves to the party. "Hello and well met. I go by the name of Silvereye, and I've been told you need guide to the mountains."
Anor nods to the dwarf. "Aye, seems like we do."

Alice: “First Sergeant Hirschmann, of Eisenberg.”

Silvereye stands up and lifts his backpack, flashing a smile at Morna and nodding respectfully to each of the others in turn as they introduce themselves. "Let's get going. The first snow comes early at the mountains and it would be unpleasant to be caught in the open in it."

DM: Morna nods. As you advance northward, the drizzling turns into a steady rainfall, halving the party's visibility. The first dozen or so miles of the trail runs close to the river, and the rising water levels threaten to flood the path. A cold breeze blows along the river. Mosquitoes feast upon the unfortunate dwarves as the dirt trail turns to puddles and mud beneath their feet. After a few hours, the path leads up into the hills, and the path is still muddy but not quite so dry.

Bohzag: ((Just want to point out that mossies can't survive in cold weather.))

Alice: ((Aye, they aren't so keen about rain either afaik.))

DM: ((These are winter-rain mosquitoes. o_o; ))

Anor smiles. "At least it could be worse. How are you guys holding up?" Looking back at his companions.

Bohzag seems to be trudging at a rather steady pace, dodging puddles and loose soil as he walks like it was a second nature.

Alice scoffs. "A soldier of Eisenberg does not fear a little rough weather" and is still steadily marching through the mud.

Silvereye walks first of the line, seemingly unbothered by the rain and mosquitoes, though occasionally turning to see how the others are doing. "How do you feel about a raft? We could cut a lot of hiking, that way. More mosquitoes, though."

Bohzag grunts "Rather keep hiking."

Anor nods. "A raft won’t likely support my friends weight." Patting his horse's shoulder.

DM: The party has traveled about 14 miles so far. It soon nears dusk. The party passes what appears to be a recently-used campsite. A small, level area off the trail has the remains of a kicked-over campfire, and a small gulf with a stream running down the hillside. A parchment has been nailed to a tree near the back of the campsite, with what appears to be a pile of marbled-red rock underneath it.

Anor sets to work gathering dry wood for a fire and setting up camp.

Bohzag sets to work setting up his hanging tent.

Silvereye drops his backpack on a dry-ish spot before going to take a look at the parchment.

Alice also goes to take a look at said parchment.

Gwynne does as well, rather curious at this point.

As you near the parchment, you recognize the pile underneath for what it is: a stack of dwarven heads, recently lopped from their bodies. The bodies are nowhere to be found. The sign appears to be in Elven.

Alice reads the parchment aloud. "Thus for all dwarves!" Alice then checks the pile of head a bit closer.

Silvereye: "Bloody overgrown squirrels." Silvereye mutters under his breath. He checks to see how recently this was done.

Gwynne: "B...Barbarians! And they call themselves a dignified and respectable race. This is downright disgusting." Gwynne falls to a single knee and begins to offer a prayer, giving these fallen at least some semblance of peace.

DM: Silvereye estimates that the campfire was only kicked over within the last ten hours. There are tracks leading west. An effort has been made to conceal them, but not a very good effort.

Anor wanders over and frowns. "We can at least bury the poor lads." Picking up a couple skills and looking for a place to lay them in the earth.

Silvereye: "The elves can't be too far. We should probably find a less obvious resting place for the night."

Gwynne: "That would be for the best, Anor. Give them some manner of respect in death."

Alice grunts. "I don't like this... the elves do not treat fallen enemies like this, and this note, no elf would be proud to call this proper elven writing."

Silvereye studies the tracks in more detail. "They're usually better at hiding their tracks, too."

Anor nods as he takes the time to bury the skulls. "Perhaps someone wishes to goad us into a reckless charge through the woods. It might be best to proceed with caution."

Gwynne: "It does seem a little outlandish...I may have jumped to conclusions with my original assumption. T’was a lapse in judgment."

DM: Alice's local knowledge doesn't yield anything new, but Gwynne does not think elven blades were used to cut off these heads. They were hacked off, possibly with axes or poorly-maintained swords. Also, one of the heads appears to have been hit with a morning-star, or a similar spiked weapon.

DM: Upon closer examination, Anor recognizes one of the heads: it is a cousin, Imien Urthal. Imien was a ranger, and the last you had heard of him, he was training new dwarven stalkers and rangers to begin replacing those that had died in the war. Imien had an uneven braid in his beard due to a scar he received during the war. Anor would recognize his beard anywhere.

Silvereye goes to look around for another campsite, one that would be better hidden from any rampaging bands of violent people.

Gwynne: "These weren't done by elven weapons. Their weapons are designed to cleave heads off. I remember form my time as an acolyte. These were most likely done by axes or rather dull swords. One of the heads even appears to have been hit with a morningstar or similar instrument. My guess is that it's rogues or someone else."

DM: How far from the old campsite is Silvereye looking?

Silvereye: (In a spiral. Starting at a hundred feet, then further.)

Anor wraps the head in a cloth and packs the head away in a saddle bag. "I will get you home soon." Turning take a look at the tracks to see what left them.

DM: Silvereye is able to spot a decent, less prominent campsite, about 100 yards away from the old campsite.

Alice looks towards Anor. "Anyone you knew?"

Silvereye comes back to the others after finding the site. "I found a better site this way. We'll have to keep the cooking fires small so we won't get any visitors, though."

Anor frowns and nods. "A cousin. I will take him back to my family crypt to rest with our ancestors." Examining the tracks his frown deepens. "A bugbear.... That does not bode well."

Gwynne: "I'm surprised they'd come out around here. Given the tension in the region, you think they'd stay back."

Alice recalls what she can about bugbears.

DM: Bugbears are the largest type of goblinoid. Generally they are loners, or work together in small bands, but they have been also known to sometimes work with other goblinoid races. A bugbear actively seeks to inflict as much suffering and pain as possible, not only upon their prey, but upon those who care for their prey. And their friends. And anyone who owes them money. And anyone in the general vicinity.

Anor nods. "Though I doubt this was their doing. Seems a little too well planned for bugbears. They are likely following someones orders." Turning to Silvereye. "Let us set up camp first, then worry about them in the morning."

Silvereye takes his backpack and leads the others to the campsite before letting out a long, ululating call, trusting his bird to be near enough to hear it.

Alice grits her teeth upon the mention of bugbears. "Foul creatures..." Alice takes out her canteen and takes a sip to calm down a bit.

DM: A man-sized avian creature flaps out of the skies, landing near Silvereye.

Gwynne: "Still. Who would want to organize bugbears? They seek nothing but harm in a region that barely needs it..." Gwynne spoke in a naive manner. She'd set her gear down once they arrived at the new camp.

Anor sets setting up his sleeping back before getting to work removing his horse's armour and brushing him down.

Silvereye rubs the young roc's belly and plucks a couple damaged feathers. "Did you see anything odd nearby? Bugbears, perhaps?"

Alice looks around for a sturdy looking tree and sets up her hanging tent on a large branch.

Gwynne sets up her sleeping area as well, laying down a blanket first before setting down her bedroll for the evening.

Silvereye patiently listens to the roc squawk and nod towards west before turning to the others. "Elessar says there are some bugbears west of here."

Alice turns towards Silvereye. "Are they far?"

Silvereye turns to look back at the roc questioningly.

Anor gives the dwarf a nod as he works on grooming his horse.

DM: The roc tilts its head at Silvereye, not fully understanding how to answer the question.

Silvereye sighs. "The bird isn't good with distances, I'm afraid. I don't think they are too far, though."

DM: Ellesar squawks in agreement.

Silvereye doesn't seem to be concerned with sleeping arrangements, and instead digs a small hole to build a cooking fire in before starting to make supper.

Alice counts the heads.

Gwynne: "So we're in danger...Means we may have to set up a watch of some kind"

Anor frowned as he let his horse go to graze on grass. "Guess we will just have to keep an eye out for them."

DM: Six heads in all, including Anor's cousin.

Alice mutters. "It'd be unpleasant if they become aware of our presence, they seemingly took down 6 of our kind without much struggle."

Anor shook his head. "I doubt my cousin's rangers went down easily. They likely just took their wounded and slain with them. I will take first watch."

DM: Morna speaks up. "I don't like this. This was done by bugbears, but coordinated by a defter hand. For one thing, I've never heard of a bugbear that spoke any elven."

Anor nods. "Indeed it was. Which is why we are being cautious now."
Alice: "You have a point, I'm curious as to whom their master could be and where they learned to write elven, although poorly."

Silvereye after having been assigned a watch, walks off to the side and pulls a rune-carved rod from his bandolier before casting a spell that causes strands of webbing to spray from his hands, soon creating a shelter large enough for himself and anyone else without a tent.

DM: Morna lets Gwynne stay with her. The night passes uneventfully. Party has rested and breakfasted.

Silvereye: In the morning Silvereye wakes up as his tent evaporates, prompting him to get up quickly.

Anor goes to get his horse ready for the day. "So, should we continue to the keep, or do we try to take out the bugbears?"

Gwynne: Gwynne wakes the following morning and gets to praying for her usual set up of spells

Silvereye spends his morning in deep meditation, communing with the forest and the hills.

Alice remains in her tent after waking up, reciting an old tale for herself before eventually climbing out of her tent and having breakfast.

Silvereye does not get involved in arguing about the course, merely prepares himself to guide the others where-ever needed.

DM: Morna is quick to rise, and nods at Anor. "Our mission is the keep, but these recent developments bear some investigation. I say we see about the bugbears."

Alice packs up her tent after making sure it's dry and clean.

Anor nods to Morna. "Plus, leaving them could prove unwise later when you return to town."

DM: Morna smiles. "It had occurred to me, yes."

Silvereye sends the bird to see if it can find the bugbears.

Gwynne: "They could come back and in force—best to nip them in the bud before they get too numerous."

Anor gathers up his gear and saddles up. "Shall we settle upon a marching order now?"

DM: The roc lands after about twenty minutes, and indicates some confusion about the location of the bugbears.

Silvereye: "The bugbears seem to be gone." Silvereye informs the rest of the party. "We could probably hunt them down in a day or two, but..." he meaningfully glances at the sun.

Anor frowns and nods. "Aye, we can't afford to waste that much time from our objective."

Alice: "As much as I'd like to avenge our fallen kindred, we're on an important mission here."

Gwynne: "True. We'll have to wait another day to bring them to justice."

DM: Morna frowns. "I don't like the idea of leaving these creatures to roam behind us, but you do raise some good points."

Anor nods. "We were tasked with getting you to the keep. And we can't afford to waste a day or two off course."

DM: Morna smirks. "Aye, and then I have the task of getting back to Axtkopf safely."

Anor nods and smiles. "A journey I will gladly help you with."

Silvereye nods, as it seems that everyone is in agreement here. "I'll go scout ahead. The bird will also be around somewhere." Taking the rod from his bandolier again, he mutters to himself as if casting a spell before replacing the rod and shimmering into the form of a large wolf, easily jogging ahead of the party.

Anor takes the lead on his warhorse, his shield and axe readied.

Silvereye casts extended Longstrider on himself before wildshaping into a wolf (max duration 8 hours due to trait), going to scout ahead with base speed of 60. Also looking for food, possibly a young deer or rabbit or something.
DM: Morna travels close behind Anor, scanning the trees.

Alice marches along in the rear, ensuring no one falls out of order.

Gwynne: "Hopefully we won't get much more rain..."

DM: You hear a slight commotion up the trail from the druid's direction.

Anor moves 20 feet ahead of the rest and goes to check out the commotion.

Gwynne stays back and waits to see what the others turn up.

Alice follows Anor with her axe at the ready.

DM: It appears to be a hare, running away southward, about 200 feet from the trail. Towards the end of the evening, the sun is beginning to set.

Anor shakes his head before continuing along the path.

Alice sees the hare run past, grumbles and puts her axe away.

Gwynne: "Guess we all got a little jumpy there, didn't we?"

Anor shrugged a little. "Better to be jumpy, then unprepared for an attack."

Gwynne: "But we can't let paranoia get the better of us, lest we start jumping at our own shadows."

Silvereye: A large wolf approaches the party from the west, before shimmering into the familiar shape of Silvereye the dwarf. "An ambush just ahead. Bugbears."

Anor frowns and nods. "I see. How many?"

Silvereye: "I didn't get close enough to count. They're waiting behind ridges to the sides of the trail."

Silvereye: "Not very many, I think."

Gwynne: "So what? We find another way around? Or hit the ambush head on?"

Anor nods and grins. "Guess we should go and say hello then." Looking to Gwynne with a laugh. "We could always ambush them back."

Silvereye: "If we're quick and stealthy, we could hit half the ambush and deal with them before the other half catches on."

Gwynne: "Stealthy? Me? I doubt I can be quite with this field plate on."
Alice scoffs. "Looks like tracking them down was unnecessary, I've been itching for a fight."

Alice: "I'm not too stealthy myself, I do have my longbow to catch fleeing prey, however."

Silvereye grabs a stick and draws a quick sketch of the ambush site on the dirt.

Anor chuckles. "I can be fairly quiet, but I don't think the woman can. I could charge one side to startle them while you attack behind. Then they will only think it is me attacking. Did you see which side had their leader?"

Gwynne: "A distraction ploy might bet the better option, but only if you're willing to take the risk. I wouldn't want anyone to come to more harm then they need to."

Silvereye: There are two ridges to the sides of the trail about 40 feet apart, hiding the bugbears.

Anor pats his mount and grins. "We have been through worse scraps."

DM: The ground slopes upwards to the west. To the east, it slopes up for about 30 feet, then down. The trail is to the north. The bugbears are on either side of the trail, behind natural ridges.

Silvereye: "If I may suggest, we might want to attack them from the west. I can slow down the bugbears on the east side."

Anor nods. "Sounds like a good idea to me."

Silvereye follows Anor, casting spell of Iron Skin on himself and of Shillelagh on his gnarly quarterstaff. (+4 natural armor, stave counts as +1 weapon and deals 2d6 damage)

DM: So who's heading west and who's heading east?


DM: So the party is heading northeast, to circle back and strike westward, openly approaching from the east at about 100 feet.
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Has a penis diamiter of 4.5cm
Nov 10, 2008
Re: KaRV Session Transcripts (Edited)

Second Session, 13 November (part two, the party encounters bugbears and wolves):
Anor makes sure to check that his weapon and shield were drawn.

Gwynne shield and weapon are already at the ready, knowing full well a blood bath was about to take place.

DM: Morna follows along closely, arrow notched in bow. The party hears a woman screaming to the west.

Anor frowns. "Guess we have no time to wait." He kicks his mount into a gallop and charges towards the ambushers.

DM: The party has line of sight to the ridges. There is one bugbear standing next to the west ridge, facing eastward, and another taking partial cover on the west side of the eastmost ridge, also facing east. Both have javelins at the ready and morningstars on hand.

Alice readies her axe (And also ponders them rage songs).

Anor charges the front bugbear, mounted on Bracken, who also attacks.

DM: Both bugbears miss with their javelins. Anor misses, but his horse Bracken connects. The largish goblinoid takes a hoof to the knees, growling with rage, but still standing.

Duvak casts Bull’s Strength on himself and moves twenty feet, while drawing his crossbow.

DM: The two wolves charge at Anor's horse Bracken, teeth bared. They snap at the horse, missing. The bugbear swings at Anor with his morningstar, striking a glancing blow. The second bugbear readies his morningstar and moves around to the north slightly, watching the party and blowing four blasts on a horn.

Silvereye moves towards the bugbears, swinging his shillelagh threateningly (using double move to get within 60 feet of them so he can charge next round).

Anor swings his axe at the bugbear. Bracken stomping on him afterwards.

DM: The bugbear collapses as Anor's axe bites into his shoulder.

Bracken is stomping a wolf, instead.

DM: The hoof grazes the wolf, which growls in some pain.

Alice moves 20ft towards the 2nd bugbear while drawing her bow and firing at it.

DM: The sergeant's arrow whistles by the bugbear, embedding itself in the nearby dirt.

DM: So Gwynne moves forward 20' and bulls strengths the Skald.

Gwynne: Wasting no time to make herself useful, Gwynne moves forward as far as she's able, preparing one of her spells for their skald. "Lady Alice, I hope this'll help" A quick prayer for strength made, Gwynne touched Alice's shoulder. She'd feel the energy flowing through her.

DM: Morna moves forward twenty feet and looses an arrow at the unharmed bugbear, burying the shaft into the bugbear's arm.

Alice feeling a bit down about missing such an easy target, is filled with strength from the pat on her shoulder. "Thanks, I'll get him next time."

Duvak continues to make his way towards the melee, firing a crossbow bolt at the distant bugbear. More a warning shot than anything, given that ranged combat was far from his expertise.

DM: Duvak's bolt sticks in the mud. The wolves snap at Bracken's horse, flanking it. One of them connects, drawing blood.

Anor: (Ride check to negate attack)

DM: You fail to negate the hit. The other wolf misses. The last bugbear closes in, swinging his morningstar at Anor in a vicious arc. The bugbear swings, misses, and trips himself, landing prone.

DM: ((Our first natural 1—expect similar failures for all natural 1’s.))

Silvereye charges at one of the worgs, hopefully flanking it as he inelegantly swings the quarterstaff at it.

DM: The worg yelps as the staff cracks a few ribs—it did not enjoy that.
Anor casts a quick cure spell on Bracken. Meanwhile, Bracken strikes at the offending worg.

DM: The bugbear and one of the wolves take advantage of the opening, inflicting some harm on the rider, but the spell works and Bracken is cured. Bracken's attack fails to connect.

Alice drops her bow to the ground and jogs forty feet towards the bugbear while drawing her greataxe.

Gwynne runs forward sixty feet.

DM: Morna fires an arrow into the melee, sinking her shot into the wolf’s side. So... one wolf looking MUCH worse for wear, one wolf not even harmed yet, one bugbear down, one bugbear with an arrow in the arm.

Duvak moves twenty feet and draws his axe, stashing his crossbow away into his handy haversack, and closing to 60 feet.

DM: The wolves bite at Bracken again, only catching air. The bugbear stands to swing at Anor again, giving Anor and Bracken the chance to hit him. Anor misses, but Bracken’s hoof catches him in the belly. The bugbear swings at Anor again, connecting with a solid (critical) hit.

Silvereye: Druid smash.

DM: Silvereye finishes off the wounded warg, crushing its head into a furry pulp with his cudgel.

Silvereye also 5-foot steps towards the living bugbear.

DM: Also, as things stand now, nobody is flanking anybody.

Anor defensively casts another cure spell on himself, while Bracken bites the bugbear.

DM: The second bugbear goes down.

Alice moves double to close the distance.

Gwynne grit her teeth, feeling her time to remain passive was over. Launching into a charge, Gwynne aimed for the beast.

DM: Her hit connects, and the wolf isn’t looking so healthy now. Morna fires another shot into the melee, sinking another shaft into the wolf.

Duvak strolls up with a double move.

DM: Okay... the wolf tries to run. Anor and Gwynne and Bracken get AoOs. Anor connects. The wolf is badly injured, but is now 250' away from the melee. Next round it'll be lost over a hill.

Anor spurs his horse to full speed (250’) and cuts down the wolf.

DM: And the wolf goes down.

Anor grins and pats his horse's neck. He heads back to the rest of the party. "Not bad."

DM: So... you've got dying bugbears and wolves.

Gwynne: The fight finally over, Gwynne couldn't believe she had actually drawn blood. But the sensation would quickly pass. "Is anyone in need of aid?"

DM: Oh, and you notice a bit of a grisly totem between the two ridges... a spear sticking out of the ground, pointing upwards. Two female dwarf heads are mounted on the spear in silent screams.

Anor frowns before looking about for other dwarf corpses.

Gwynne: "Gods above! Damn savages!" Gwynn was beyond shocked at the sight. These things knew no remorse.

DM: You find pieces of the dwarves. The two bugbears are wearing necklaces adorned by dwarf fingers, and each had a small sack containing roasted pieces of dwarf meat. Closer examination of the mounted dwarf heads show signs of sexual misconduct, as well.

Gwynne: "Sickening. Absolutely sickening. World would be better off if we purged this damn things from the face of the earth. No one would miss them or mourn their passing."

Anor hops down and looks for some way to identify his cousins body.

DM: Anor finds it hard to pick out any remnants of his cousin's body from the sack of roasted dwarf. One of the bugbears coughs up some blood.

Anor curses softly. "The least we can do is to give them a proper burial."

Gwynne: "Allow me to help in that regards. Proper funerary rites can't be ignored here."

Anor turns and frowns at the alive bugbear. He approached holding his axe and speaking Orcish. "Do you understand me?"

Bugbear (DM): "I speak Dwarf-tongue, you bearded fuck." It sneers at Anor.

Gwynne: "Don't even waste your breath on him. He's done nothing to earn it." Gwynne was beyond angry at these beasts as she adorned her priest vestments.

Anor grinned and he nestled his blade against the bugbear's balls. "Good, who leads you?"

DM: Anor discovers that this particular bugbear is a female, despite appearances.

Anor paid no mind, cutting there hurt just as bad regardless of gender.

Bugbear (DM0: "Are we making a deal, you fucking midget? I'm already dying. And you are all dead. Dead, dead, dead." She coughs up more blood.

Gwynne: "What makes you say that, you heartless wretch?!" Gwynne returns in her priest robes, still very much angry.

Duvak walks over, his visage rigid and...stoic despite having seen the atrocities committed. "...Are you now? I'm afraid a quick death like that isn't enough for the atrocities you've committed."

Anor grinned at the bugbear. "Who says we will let you, hmm? Who is to say I don't torture you?"

DM: One of the wolves barks a sharp rebuke at the bugbear in Goblin.

Anor: Bracken snorts and tries to kick the wolf's head.

DM: Bracken crushes the wolf's skull under hoof.

Anor: Bracken snorts and then goes to munch some grass like nothing is amiss.

Anor chuckled. "Shall I repeatedly cut and heal you?" (Intimidate)

DM: The bugbear takes an additional point of damage from laughing so hard at Anor's attempt to intimidate.

Anor grinned as he pulled out his skinning knife and rope. "You ladies may wish to look away." He ties the bugbear up before curing its wounds.

Duvak: "...It is...amusing that that these cretins believe death would be the end of their suffering. Especially in the presence of so many spirits of restless Dwarven ancestors. Even if you were to...pass on, while you may be safe from the suffering of my brother, you are not safe from me." (Intimidate)

DM: Okay, the bugbear is stabilized and tied. The torturer needs to make a heal check. The victim gets a will save against the result. Per hour.

Anor is using the skinning knife as torture implement.

DM: The bugbear's screams echo as night falls. Finally, she whispers a name. "Bartouk."

Anor smiles as he examines a particularly fine piece of skin. "What race?"

Bugbear (DM): "Bartouk promised us much blood and sport. He is... a hobgoblin. He and his pet have seen you. They stalked your campsite last night. Told us where to wait. Told us who you were."

Anor nodded as he settled down as if to acquire a new piece. "Guess you should tell me everything about them then."

Bugbear (DM): "Only if you promise to kill me. As painful as this is, it is tickling compared to my fate at their hands."

Anor smiled cruelly. "Guess it all depends on how good the info is." Turning to look at Duvak. "Think we should prepare a stake for her to sit on and slowly impale herself on?"

Bugbear (DM): "If I speak, you torture me. If I am silent, you torture me."

Anor: "Have I tortured you since speaking? Now tell me, or we shall resume our little game."

Bugbear (DM): "First you promise me death." The bugbear is clearly terrified of her master.

Anor: "Fine."

Bugbear (DM): "Bartouk is... a warrior-priest of dark things. A servant of demons. There were nine dwarves that we fell upon. The last... the last was consumed."

Anor: "The last to stand?"

Bugbear (DM): "We call it his pet, but we do not know which is master and which is pet. It is a wolf-demon with a goblin face. It consumes the fallen and draws their strength."

Anor: "Was the ‘last’ the dwarves’ leader?"

Gwynne: "Fantastic. Demons and hell spawn. Last thing we need on top of everything else we're doing."

Bugbear (DM): "I do not know. They all fell. The last was eaten alive."

Gwynne: "And what of the violation of these two? Care to explain that?"

DM: The bugbear indicates its dead comrade. "Men."

Anor hefts his axe. "Anyone have any more questions?"

Bugbear (DM): "Just kill me, you fucking dwarf."

Anor nods. "As you wish." Anor swings his axe towards the thing’s face.

Gwynne: "Get on with it."

DM: Aaaaand dead bugbear. It's nighttime now. The party can hear distant howling.

Anor frowns as he wipes off his blades on a bugbear. He goes to skin himself some worg hides. "Guess we have some stalkers."

Gwynne: "Guess we'll need another night of watch if we're going to be constantly targeted.”

DM: Is the party camping here?

Gwynne will also use a heal if anyone needs one.


DM: Okay. I'll work out the treasure by next session.


DM: Mmmkay. How can we do better on the scheduling?
Last edited:


Has a penis diamiter of 4.5cm
Nov 10, 2008
Re: KaRV Session Transcripts (Edited)

Third Session, 20 November (part one, the party offers a dwarven traveler their hospitality, enters a narrow pass):
DM: One divine scroll of remove disease. One masterwork warhammer. One potion of cure light wounds. One chain shirt. One chain mail, three battle axes, and one shortbow (non-composite). Also, on the bugbears, one leather armor, one light wooden shield, one morningstar, and two javelins (each).
Silvereye: Nothing of particular interest to me. You'll probably want to give it to one of the other casters, since I'm going to be away from the party and wild-shaped, so not even able to use it.
Anor: Oh, I thought you said the chain shirt was.
Alice hogs the mage armor scroll. *-*
DM: Oh, and Anor has skinned the two worgs.
Anor: Nothing of use to me either, other then the warhammer. Though I already have quite a few weapons.
DM: You've also got a heap of dwarf body parts, that I think you guys were going to bury?
Bohzag: Nothing of value to Bohzag in the pile.
Anor will also take one of their skulls too. We bury the dead dwarves.
DM: Anor produces a knife and begins popping eyeballs and muscle off of one of the worg skulls… Which makes dinner a bit less appealing to the rest of the party.
DM: Morna speaks up, "I can probably sell whatever you folks don't want back in Axtkopf, when I make the return journey, and bring back an order of needed goods."
Anor nods. "Alright. Though I think I will be keeping these pelts." Speaking as he wraps them up into bundles and ties them behind brackens saddle.
Anor: Armour and weapons.
Gwynne takes the divine scroll.
DM: It is already nighttime as the party finishes dealing with the bugbears. At the start of the combat, one of the bugbears did blow a horn, which the party remembers quite well. The group can hear the distant howl of wolves in the night.
Gwynne: It had to be wolves.
Bohzag looks up as he hears the wolf howls "That does not sound good."
Silvereye has been staying away from the others during the torture session
Alice tucks the scroll inside her watertight bag.
Anor frowned at the sounds. Stowing his axes away and drawing his longbow. "Seems we will have company shortly. It will be a long night." Mounting up onto bracken.
Bohzag takes his rifle off of his back, turning northward warily "Company."
Silvereye suddenly perks up and shuffles back to the others. "Something coming. Get ready."
Alice: "First bugbears, and now wolves? Seems like we woke up the wrong neighborhood." She draws her greataxe.
DM: The wind picks up for a moment, and it begins drizzling. The party can feel a thunderstorm in the air.
Anor grumbled lightly a moment. "We either need to get moving, or find a place to hunker down before the wolves set upon us. I fear the storm is the least of our worries."
Alice casts Expeditious Retreat on herself (duration 4 minutes).
DM: A bolt of lightning illuminates the area for a moment, and the party can see a medium figure approaching on the trail, on foot, with another creature upon four legs, somewhat smaller. It's at a distance of about 150', and approaching slowly.
Anor aims his bow at the approaching figure and shouts out to them. "Halt and identify yourself!"
Bohzag raises his musket to his shoulder, aiming it in the general direction he saw the figure. "Who goes there?!" he shouts out in Dwarven.
Gwynne stays silent and moves towards what could best be described as the back of the group.
Silvereye pulls his ashen holy symbol from below the heavy leathers that normally cover it, casually leaning on his stave.
DM: You hear a voice in Dwarven, "Don't shoot!"
Anor relaxes a little but maintains a bead on the figure. "Identify yourself!"
Bohzag lowers the musket slightly, though he keeps it pressed against his shoulder.
DM: However, the lightning was only a temporary illumination, so unless you've got 120' darkvision, you can no longer see the figure.
Noddy (DM): "I'm just a tinker. Name's Noddy! And my goat Piney!"
Anor looks to the others. "We should leave and hurry on our way."
Bohzag: "And leave a fellow Dwarf in the rain to be eaten by wolves?"
Silvereye: "Perhaps it would be better to ask about the road ahead?"
Noddy (DM): "You folks run into any of them wolves? I've been trying to stay ahead of them, this whole time!"
Gwynne: You didn't have to tell me twice. Faster we get to that fort the better. Plus, I'd like to be out of the rain before my vestments get sopping and my armor rusts.
Alice: "We ran into some worgs, we just heard some wolves howling though"
Noddy (DM): "Worgs? Whatsa worg?"
Anor nodded, then shook his head. "I highly doubt they are normal wolves. They likely belong to Bartouk. More then likely they will ignore him in favour of us."
Noddy (DM): "You folks mind if we talk a bit closer? It's been a long day, and my voice is giving out."
Anor nods and shouts back. "Sure!" Lowering his bow, but keeping an arrow nocked and ready.
"Noddy" enters your darkvision range, and appears to be an elderly dwarf in traveling clothes, wearing a backpack and leading a goat.
Alice makes a knowledge check on worgs (rolling a 13).
Bohzag lowers his musket, though he keeps it held in both hands
Noddy (DM): "Yup, this here forest full of all sort o' nasty folk. I seen elves and wolves and goblins and other critters... makes my skin crawl." Noddy nods repeatedly.
Anor nods to Noddy. "Which is why we should get moving immediately," turning Bracken around to face down the road to the keep.
Gwynne: "Mind telling us where you're heading, traveler?"
Silvereye actively attempts sense motive.
Noddy (DM): "I was just heading home, actually. Axtkopf. Now that I hear the war's over, anyway."
Alice answers Noddy to enlighten him about it. "Think big evil smarter wolves—goblins tend to lead them"
Noddy (DM): "Bigger, evil, smart wolves? Heavens-to-Betsy. Sounds pretty goshdarn frightening."
Alice uses detect magic on the goat, which appears to be non-magical.
Noddy (DM): "Say, you folks look pretty tough. You mind if I camp with you folks tonight? I haven't gotten a good night's sleep in days."
Gwynne: "They can be sir. But we're able to deal with them quite handily. No need for you to worry." Gwynne addressed the man calmly, remembering her position
Anor nodded. "Sure, though I suggest we find shelter first."
Bohzag hefts his musket onto his shoulder, looking at the others, seeing as how he can't actually see Noddy.
Noddy does not look magical, either.
Noddy (DM): "Oh, I surely do appreciate it. I wish I had coin to give you, but this war's been awful for my folks. I've been eating leaves and berries, the past few days! A word of caution to you young folks... avoid the brown berries. Unless you need your bowels loosened."
Noddy falls in step with the party.
Gwynne: "Payment isn't necessary. The reward comes from aiding our kinsman when they need it."
Silvereye: "Well, at least we can give you a good meal before we see you off, then." Silvereye mutters, going to look for a good campsite.
Bohzag has an everburning torch, but has opted to not use it seeing as how something is hunting them. Without darkvision, he can’t see Noddy… or anything else, really. Of course, the party has no idea that Bohzag is essentially blind in darkness.
DM: The party continues down the trail. The howling of the wolves continues, but does not seem to get substantially louder. After another hour, Silvereye spots what looks to be a useable campsite, a little ways off the trail, hidden somewhat by the hilly terrain.
Silvereye sets down his pack, calls down his pet and starts gathering firewood.
Anor starts to set up his gear and tending to Bracken. Making sure he is groomed and unarmoured for the night.
DM: Noddy talks almost continuously about the weather in these parts, those damned elves, those damned wolves, and how young people have it so much better than they used to. It is still drizzling, with occasional flashes of lightning and bursts of thunder.
Gwynne needs someone to tent with.
Bohzag finds a nice tree to set up his hanging tent, clambering into it when all is said and done
DM: Morna offers to let Gwynne tent with her.
Duvak glances oddly in Bohzag's direction after he's nearly stumbled off the trail multiple times, frowning a bit as he nearly crashes into a tree. "...Are you alright comrade Bohzag? You've been stumbling about as if you've had a bit too much to drink."
Gwynne: "My fault for not buying a proper tent. I figured we'd be at the fort much faster than this."
DM: Morna then catches Noddy's goat munching on her tent, and ties the goat to a tree at a safe distance.
Bohzag: "I'm fine. Just not used to moving about in the dark."
After setting Bracken loose to graze on the nearby grass, Anor settles down in his bedroll.
Silvereye gathers enough firewood to get a small fire going and offers Noddy a share of his rations
Noddy thanks the druid and eats heartily, giving the occasional appreciative belch.
Gwynne once settled in, offers another prayer to the departed they encountered today before relaxing a little bit and munching on one of her own rations.
Alice sets up her hanging tent in another sturdy tree.
Duvak: "...Too much time spent in the poison of daylight then? Pity, Dwarves should take care to balance the amount of time they spend on the surface with their ancestral homes."
DM: The drizzling rain abates after a few hours, and the wolves stop howling. The clouds part, and Bohzag can see fine in the low light.
Bohzag: "My ancestral home is the forest, sadly. My family has always lived on the surface, doing the job they were given generations ago."
DM: Apart from the crackling of the firewood and their own voices, the dwarves are surrounded by an eerie silence, interrupted only by the occasional rumble of thunder in the distance.
Silvereye casts his spell to create a shelter for the night, sharing with anyone who needs it after making sure that whoever is taking the watch knows that the fire should keep the wolves at bay
DM: Within moments of finishing the food that Silvereye gave him, the old dwarf is snoring where he sits in front of the fire.
Anor munches on some of his rations and sets his bow next to himself. "I will take first watch."
Alice also noms her rations and finishes with a sip of her canteen
Anor takes 1st watch, Bohzag 2nd, Duvak 3rd.
Duvak , upon noticing, an irregularity in the camp, opts to stir the others awake. Starting with those who'd taken watch earlier. "...The old man is missing, did any of you see anything during your watches?"
Bohzag grumbles as he stirs awake, his right hand reaching for his musket as he does so.
DM: At this point it's about a half-hour til dawn, and the area is fairly well-lit.
Gwynne: "He what? He ran off?" Gwynne mumbled awake as she picked herself up and began donning her armor
Duvak: "Unsure, he simply disappeared during the night. Whether he wandered off, or was whisked away by a shadow is...unclear at this time. Shall we fan out and search?"
Bohzag fumbles out of his tent, nearly face-planting on the way out.
Silvereye quickly dresses and gets out of his shelter, having gotten a good night's sleep without even taking a shift at the watch, minutes before the web dissipates.
Morna dons her armor. "What about his goat?"
Alice grabs her greataxe and climbs out of her tent "What's this ruckus about?"
Bohzag rights himself as he begins to take down his tent "The old man decided to wander off in the middle of the night."
Silvereye looks for tracks around the campsite
Alice: "No one's missing anything valuable I hope?"
Gwynne: "Seems strange he'd find the courage to just wander off by himself after all his talk."
DM: No one seems to be missing anything.
Duvak: "...Not sure exactly how relevant the goat is to this, but yes, it's missing as well."
Alice: "Hrm... I had a hunch something was off about that old man, who knows what he was planning."
Morna grumbles, "Might have been a tasty breakfast, is all."
Duvak stops for a moment as he ponders this, then blinks as if coming to a sudden realization, "...No, that means he left intentionally. "
Gwynne: "Lets not assume the worst."
Silvereye: "Horse tracks. I think someone came to get him and his goat."
Alice: "Which way do the tracks lead?"
Silvereye: "Back to the road. Shall I try to follow them?"
Bohzag finished packing away his tent in his backpack, and hefts it onto his back "If he left of his own accord, then we should continue on our way. If the tracks lead opposite our path, then there's nothing we can do for him."
The divine casters prepare spells for the day.
Taking a moment amidst all the noise and chaos, Gwynne would sit somewhere quite to prepare her spells for the day.
Silvereye finds a quiet spot and lets his soul rest in the surrounding forest, conjuring images of human sacrifices and holy groves into his mind.
Duvak communes with the spirits of Dwarvern ancestors for guidance, and for the means to heal the wounded this day.
DM: The party is under the effects of a bless spell.
Finally free from her meditation, Gwynne seems surprisingly pleased with what she had just seen. "The gods have blessed us this day. And I know who our mysterious friend was from last night."
Bohzag hefts his musket onto his shoulder as he prepares to move. "I say we continue towards the keep. We have a mission, and we would do well to keep to it."
Gwynne: "Odin was quite pleased with our hospitality. And Lady Freya offers me further strength for the day."
DM: And the fire from last night is out. Gray storm clouds cover the sky again, and with a few ominous blasts of thunder, the rain begins pouring down once more.
Alice sits down somewhere and mumbles a short tale for herself.
Gwynne: "Another test perhaps. Let’s carry on. We wouldn't want to disappoint them."
Bohzag begins to groan as he takes a piece of cloth from one of his pockets and wraps it around his musket where the flashpans are.
Silvereye casts Longstrider and shifts into the now familiar form of a gray wolf before jogging off to scout ahead and forage for food.
DM: Silvereye caught and killed a moose, and Bohzag shot a total of two rabbits. The hunting does slow the party down somewhat. What is Bohzag using to hunt with?
Bohzag typically shoots things.
Silvereye tears into the belly of the moose, devouring its entrails until sated, then shifts back to dwarf, then gets to work with a knife, taking choice cuts of his prey as well as the hide and the horns, leaving the rest for Elessar and carrion eaters.
DM: Silvereye can hunt and still move as fast as the party, but Bohzag's hunting will slow the party, unless I'm mistaken about something. Also, the bless effect has not ended yet.
Silvereye takes about 40 pounds of meat, plus the hide and horns.
Bohzag blasts a pair of rabbits for his own needs, grabbing both of the carcasses by the hind legs and returning to the group.
DM: Providing you carried salt, or can freeze the meat, or magically preserve it, or use a campfire tonight to make jerky, meat should last about a week. Otherwise, about 24 hours or so.
Silvereye will smoke the meat tonight. That should keep it for a while, at least. He conjures some water to wash himself, then heads back to the trail, hopefully still ahead of the others.
DM: The next two days pass uneventfully. Silvereye manages to smoke the meat and it makes for very tasty eating, for those that like the taste of wild game. The party is only a couple of days south of the keep, if the map and Duvak's memory are any indication. Towards the evening, you're nearing a small, unnamed pass between two mountains. Odin's blessing is still active on the party (and Freya's little bonus blessing for her cleric is also still active).
DM: ((At this point it's nearing the second night since Odin left the party.))
Anor: (Noddy was Odin in disquise?)
Gwynne: (Da)
Alice: (When did the rest of the party learn of this?)
Silvereye keeps scouting ahead of the party. Doesn't waste time hunting, though.
Bohzag: ((We just now learned it OOCly.))
Gwynne: (Gwynne sorta brought it up after he left, but mentioned it somewhat vaguely)
DM: ((Spodah also figured it out. And there looked to be a pair of horses... or an eight-legged steed.))
Silvereye: ((I figured it out OOC. Don't have know religion to do that IC))
Bohzag: ((Are the gods going to fuck with us like this on a regular basis?))
Gwynne: (You act like the blessings were a bad thing. :p)
Bohzag: ((If they are I am totally up for more blessings.))
DM: ((You mean give you buffs? No. I'll try to avoid it in future. o____o ))
Alice: (So what did Odin do to show his thanks for the hospitality?)
Anor: (Plus if good gods show up, evil one are just as likely to appear too. :()
DM: ((Actually this is a fairly common tale, in Greek and Norse mythology.))
Anor: (Except Zeus usually slept with women while disguised.)
DM: ((And Odin put his blessing on the party, which acts just like a bless spell, only it's lasted for two days so far.))
Alice: (Alice could do a knowledge check for Religion actually)
Bohzag: ((Basically, Odin likes to test people's goodness of heart.))
Alice: (*rubs that Bardic Knowledge benefit*)
DM: ((Roll it.))
Alice: .d 1d20+4
<Internets> :: Total 21 / 24 [87%] :: Results [17] ::
Alice: (Yeah now it rolls high huh)
DM: ((Well, you suspect that it's not kindness but hospitality that earned the blessing. Odin's really big on hospitality and on the courtesy of guests. Also, if you had to guess, the blessing will stay in effect until after your next combat. Odin likes to watch combat.))
Anor: (What Norse god doesn't?)
Bohzag: ((inb4 Skadi shows up and tries to test our winter survival >.>))
Anor: :)P)
Alice: (Well Odin's in for a treat since Alice has +1/1 atk/dmg now)
DM: So... nearing the evening, and the party's nearing a narrow pass between two mountains. After this pass, it'll be a day of traveling through the hills, and a half-day of traveling through the Red Valley, a place where some of you saw lots of your friends get killed by elves.
Bohzag skins and cleans his rabbits he had caught earlier, preparing them for cooking.
DM: The pass is only 5' wide in certain areas.
Alice: (Yay for chokepoint battles)
Anor frowns as he looks at the pass. "This doesn't look good." Tapping Bracken and causing him to take point down the pass.
Silvereye changes back to dwarf and whistles for his roc before sending him to scout the pass.
Gwynne: "We'll have to be extra cautious passing through here. Gods willing, we'll be safe."
Bohzag waits for the others to head in before him, opting to bring up the rear in case anything comes in behind them
DM: Is the party going to camp for the evening or head through the pass first?
Duvak has returned to... for lack of a more elegant term… chain smoking again as the group's come to the pass. Many memories were had around this place in the past. Some in particular were quite bitter.
DM: The pass is approximately a mile long, from what Duvak remembers.
Alice grumbles and takes a big sip from her canteen.
DM: The roc returns, and doesn't seem particularly alarmed about anything in the pass.
DM: Marching order?
DM: ((So that's... Anor/Bracken, Silvereye/Elessar, Alice, Duvak, Gwynne, Bohzag?))
Silvereye: ((and the NPC somewhere in the middle as well. Also, Elessar will be somewhere above the party.))
DM: ((Also, who else is mounted at this point? Or bringing along donkeys/mules/horses/animals?))
Anor: (I am mounted.)
DM: ((Morna will move between Alice and Duvak.))
Anor: (Also I want to give Duck and Cover to Bracken, giving him +2 ac vs ranged attacks.)
DM: ((This terrain is rocky and difficult. Movement speed is halved, and if you have to pass through another character's space, it's halved again.))
Anor gives a ten foot space between him and the druid in case Bracken slips and falls.
Silvereye follows Anor, occasionally looking behind to make sure the others can keep up.
Bohzag takes up the rear, keeping his ears open and occasionally looking back to ensure nothing is following them through the pass.
DM: ((DM rolls a bunch of dice ominously behind his screen. :3 ))
Alice: (*Is so terrified that must go take a leak*)
Gwynne: (Dangit. We're doomed)
DM: At this point, the pass is gradually curving. Visibility/cover is partial at 80' and full at 100'.
Alice: (Oh, this could be good)
Anor draws his shield and axe. Not liking the narrow pass at all.
DM: How much distance between each party member, apart from Anor/Bracken and Silvereye (which is 10')?
Gwynne: (I figure 5-10 feet as well)
Bohzag: ((Bohzag is 10 feet behind the person in front of him.))
DM: ((So... 10' between party members?))
Anor: (Seems that way. Though I only left a gap like that so a falling warhorse doesn't crush a poor dwarf.)
Duvak: ((I'll stay five feet away from Alice actually.))
DM: Morna is between Alice and Duvak.
Duvak: ((Then five feet distance to Morna.))
Alice spends 1 round of rage to give everyone Song of Marching for the next hour, allowing everyone effectively move in a hustle speed without any penalties. She begins singing a marching cadence.
Duvak stops all of a sudden, snapping backwards. "...There's something behind us."
Bohzag turns around as they march, his rifle stock being raised to his shoulder as he cocks back the flint hammers of both barrels.
Gwynne: "What is it? Do youhave sight on it or not?"
DM: Bohzag and Duvak turn, and are not flat-footed. The first thing Bohzag sees is an arrow flying towards him...
Anor stops to look back. Using Bracken's height to see what is following them.
DM: An arrow whizzes by Bohzag, close enough to brush his left ear. Behind him, at a distance of about 60 feet, is a snarling beast on all fours. It has the fur of a black worg, but the snarling face of a goblin creature, and walks on four clawed goblin hands. It is moving towards the party. Behind it stands the archer, a hobgoblin in a blackened military uniform, with what looks to be a dwarven face affixed to the front of his helm. It carries a falchion strapped to its back. Roll for initiative.


Has a penis diamiter of 4.5cm
Nov 10, 2008
Re: KaRV Session Transcripts (Edited)

Third Session, 20 November (part two, the party fights a hobgoblin antipaladin and a barghest, in a five foot wide pass):
DM: Roll for initiative.
Alice: 16
Silvereye: 6
Bohzag: 18
Gwynne: 5
Anor: 19
Duvak: 11
DM: The hobgoblin's on an 11. The wolf-creature is on a 17. Anor is up first. He can't see what's going on at this distance, but he does see the arrow whiz by Bohzag.
Anor curses colourfully as he drops his axe and shield. He nudged Bracken five feet closer as he drew his bow and cast gravity bow upon it.
DM: Bracken moves back five feet, but at this distance, Anor still sees nothing (100' visibility in curvy pass).
Bohzag shoulders his rifle, actually advancing 20 feet on the creature until it is within 40 feet of him, pulling the trigger, a shot ringing out through the pass.
DM: And everyone's still in a line, with the wolf-creature 60' behind Bohzag and the hobgoblin 10' behind the wolf-creature.
Bohzag: .d 1d20+9
Bohzag: ((Why isn't the dicebot working?))
DM: ((You done broked it, hero.))
DM: ((Silvereye, can you fix the dicebot, or should I start rolling for people over here?))
DM: ((I still has physical dice.))
Silvereye: (I could if I had any idea what's wrong with it >.>)
DM: ((By the way, I've assigned dice colors to each of you for things like group perception checks.))
* Internets ([email protected]) Quit (*.net *.split)
Alice: (Welp, that explains it)
DM: ((Anor Ivory, Alice Red, Duvak White, Gwynne Green, Bohzag Blue, Silvereye Clear Green. :3 ))
DM: Bohzag rolls an 11 for a total of 20.
Bohzag: ((That resolves against Touch AC since he's within 40 feet.))
DM: You hit it with a magnificent shot to the arm, but the wound closes up almost immediately, leaving only partial damage.
DM: Bohzag, need a Will save, with an additional +5 bonus.
Bohzag: 28
DM: The wolf-creature gazes at Bohzag, who easily shakes off the enchantment. It advances 15' (difficult terrain). Alice is up next. Alice can see the creature fully now. Silvereye and Anor can make it out somewhat under the partial cover. It's 80' from Alice.
Alice casts a spell and quickly squeezes past people, stopping shortly behind Bohzag.
DM: Duvak is next.
Duvak casts a spell as well, blue flame wrapping itself around his gauntleted fists as he moves in.
DM: The hobgoblin wearing a dwarven face on his helmet advances 15', then speaks through the dead dwarf's mouth. "FEAR ME" it intones at Bohzag. (Will save)
Bohzag: 10
DM: Bohzag is frightened for 4 rounds. Silvereye is up.
Silvereye moves closer to the combat, stopping just short of Morna.
DM: Gwynne is up next, and Morna, also on a 5.
DM: Morna looses an arrow at the wolf-creature. The arrow sinks into the creature, but falls back out, the wound healing instantly.
Gwynne: (Whats my relative position? Who’s closest to me heading in the enemies direction?)
DM: ((The linked spreadsheet has all the current distances. Refresh after each creature/character moves to update.))
Gwynne: (Spreadsheet won't display for me.)
DM: ((Duvak is 5 feet in front of you, Alice is 10 feet in front of you, Bohzag 30'. Beyond that is the wolf-creature (65') and hobgoblin (75'). All distances relative to Gwynne.))
Gwynne moves to just behind Bohzag, casting entropic shield.
DM: Anor's up next.
Anor advances twenty feet, placing Bracken just behind Silvereye. He unleashes an arrow at the wolf creature. The arrow growing to spear size as it whistled through the air.
DM: Anor's shot strikes home, and definitely gets the wolf-creature's attention. It howls in pain and anger, giving a hateful look at the dwarf who so harmed him. Bohzag's up. 1st round of frightened status.
Bohzag backpedals, bumping into Alice as he does so, trying to get away from the hobgoblin and squeezing past Duvak.
DM: The wolf-creature begins winking in and out of existence. The creature advances on Gwynne, snarling and cursing at her in Dwarven. "Priest of Freya! I fucked Freya last night! I fucked her ass! Let me share her love with you!" It seems to be flickering in and out of existence at random intervals.
Gwynne: "You insult the lady with your words, heathen. I will see you crushed for such impudence."
DM: Duvak's up.
Duvak: Blue wisps of flame suddenly surround the wolf-like creature however as spectral hands seem to rise up from the ground and seize him...not having any tangible hold on him yet, but seeming to sap his very strength from his as ancient Dwarven curses are whispered into its ears incessantly, as Duvak speaks. "...Is that so beast? The living should take great care with their words when committing sacrilege. After all, the warpriests of the past are far from forgiving of blasphemy..."
Duvak: ((Evil Eye (Saves) ends Round 10. Does not have to be renewed by Cackle/Chant till round 10.))
DM: The hobgoblin advances, and you hear it calling upon its Dark Masters in Infernal. Dark patterns swirls about it triumphantly in a small radius. It advances. "Your gods are young and weak, just like your people. Both shall fall before my Master."
Duvak: ((So I can basically continue this debuff train till all of them are taking a -2 to Attack, saves, AC, etc. untyped. And everyone in the party has a +2 to attack/damage/saves. Hue.))
Duvak: ((Oh I forgot. Free action. Activate my spirit of battle. +1 to attack and damage rolls to all allies within 30 feet. This is a morale bonus.))
DM: Silvereye is next.
DM: ((Okay.))
Silvereye squeezes past Morna and stops in front of Bohzag.
DM: Morna shoots an arrow at the hobgoblin. She misses, sinking an arrow into the mountainside.
Anor: (You rolled a d8 to hit. XD)
DM: The arrow ricochets off the mountain, sinking into the hobgoblin's arm! The hobgoblin takes an arrow in his bicep.
Alice casts a spell on herself and draws her greataxe as she goes up to the monster's face. "Gimmie your best shot you foul beast." She suddenly appears to split into 6 copies of herself (mirror image).
Gwynne: In her new position just behind Alice, Gwynne began a quick incantation, attempting Hold Person on the hobgoblin.
DM: The black patterns that swirled around the hobgoblin in a small circle last round flicker for a moment, nullifying the spell. The figure chuckles wickedly. "Freya must be tired after all that fucking, you stupid dwarven cunt."
Gwynne: "Damn fiend! Your shield can't protect you forever."
Anor frowns at the hobgoblins words. He turns his aim at the hobgoblin and unleashes another spear from his bow.
DM: The spear slashes by the hobgoblin's right thigh, eliciting a growl.
Bohzag continues to push and shove his way through the opass, desperate to get as far away from the hobgoblin as possible
DM: Bohzag manages to squeeze by Bracken.
Anor: Bracken gives the fleeing dwarf a snort of disdain at his cowardice.
DM: The wolf-creature snarls at Alice, leaping forward... and disappears. Alice is up next.
DM: The wolf-creature has reappeared directly in front of the fleeing Bohzag.
Alice looks over her shoulder and shouts "COWARD!" at the monster, then menacingly trods over to the Hobgoblin and... [rolls poorly] misses the Hobgoblin completely.
Duvak: ((Move action 20 feet towards the hobgoblin. Evil eye him as well, targetting AC. Will save please to reduce it to one round. [Hobgoblin makes his save.] K. One round duration. However... Swift action. Activating my Quick Runner's shirt to gain another move action. ))
Duvak: ((And Chant.))
DM: The dark patterns manifest again, and it laughs. "Guess Freya wasn't the only one who got fucked last night."
Duvak: "...Is that so? Let the spirits of the past be the judge of that. Fiat Justita, Ruat Caelum." Once again spectral hands reach out, and though the dark patterns seem to ward them off to some extent, as Duvak continues to chant, the hands do not dissipate unlike the spell from earlier.
DM: The hobgoblin's hand lights up with a pale, green flame. It reaches for Alice...
DM: One of your mirror images is gone.
Alice amusedly scoffs as the Hobgoblin grasps for thin air, the image in its place dissipating.
Silvereye slips past Gwynne and slips his holy symbol from under the leathers, whispering to the spirits of air and frost. (Chill Metal on the chain shirt)
DM: Morna moves to stand behind Duvak, launching another arrow at the hobgoblin, sinking it into its thigh.
Gwynne: Feeling now is the time to intervine, Gwynne would move towards the abomination. "Divine retribution is at hand. Pray to your gods, for you'll be seeing them soon." Another quick incantation and prayer and she could feel strength surging through her (Bull’s Strength).
Anor curses as he hears Bracken whinny a warning about a nearby threat. He turned and faced the wolf creature and fired an arrow.
DM: The creature snarls as you sink the shaft in its leg.
Bohzag stops in his tracks as he sees the creature, turning and attempting to climb the cliff face to escape
DM: The creature snarls, biting and clawing at the musket master (AoO).
Bohzag climbs ten feet up the cliff face
DM: The wolf-creature grins, moving forward to swing its claws at Anor. 13 total damage against Anor. And I just realized that I've been forgetting to apply its blink against attacks. Ah well. Applying it now.
Alice attempts another power attack, missing.
Duvak uses Evil eye again on the Hobgoblin, and chants. [Previous Evil Eye now ends on Round 6, hobgoblin makes his will save.]
DM: The hobgoblin draws its falchion and swings it at Alice. One of your images is destroyed. Silvereye’s up next. Also, the hobgoblin's armor hurts him with cold.
Silvereye attempts to get around the hobgoblin by climbing upwards on the canyon wall [fails climb check].
DM: Morna takes another shot at the hobgoblin. Missed.
Gwynne: Knowing she wasn't going to be able to strike him yet, the cleric went for the next best option at this point. "May your sins burn through you like a thousand suns" (burning disarm)
DM: It drops the weapon in time to avoid harm, cursing at the cleric.
Anor grinned at the wolf creature. Maneuvering to place himself between the fleeing dwarf and the creature he dropped his bow and drew his long axe. Kissing the blade he pointed it at the creature. "May Sif guide my hand. I challenge you to battle." [Swings and misses.] Also, Bracken attempts to stomp the wolf thing [critical hit, confirmed].
DM: Some of the damage heals instantly, but there's still a crunch of bone which makes the beast yelp a bit.
DM: Okay. So I'll post the position sheet. We'll go ahead and stop for today. I hate stopping mid-combat, but it's been seven hours.
DM: Up next is Bohzag, for his last round of fright. Next Thursday is Thanksgiving Day. I can't be here. Do you guys want to meet on a different day next week?
Bohzag continues to try to climb [failing the roll].
Bohzag: ((We could always postpone it an extra week.))
DM: True. I'm willing to do that, though I hate postponing mid-combat.
Alice: (So do we stop here or do I swing to miss one last time?)
DM: We've lost two players.
DM: We stop for now.
DM: Combat's just about half-done.
DM: I'm a little frustrated with how long combat's taking. '3'
Alice: (3 images left, Blessing for +1 atk... and expeditious retreat for +30 ft movement, and also upkeeping Song of Marching)
DM: You guys enjoying the villains?
Alice: That monster is a chickenshit!
Gwynne: And they got mouths on them.
DM: xD
Gwynne: Would like to split their lip for their comments
Alice: I go up to its face and it just teleports away.
DM: Well yeah. They're evil hobgoblin and wolf-demon. xD
Alice: Though I get the idea anyhow.
DM: I thought that was a fairly effective strategy. Cut off the party from both sides after psyching it out.
Alice: One's resistant to magic, the other's resistant to physical.
DM: And they did manage to eliminate Bohzag from the action for four rounds.
Alice: Well, yes. You didn't really stop us from moving around cos of Song of Marching though. '3'
DM: Fine by me. I wasn't looking forward to having you guys move slowly anyway. But you guys are close to the keep. After this encounter, it's only a day and a half.
Last edited:


Has a penis diamiter of 4.5cm
Nov 10, 2008
Re: KaRV Session Transcripts (Edited)

Fourth Session, 4 December (the party defeats Bartouk and the barghest, reaches the end of the pass, gains a level):
DM62: The wolf-demon bites and claws at Anor. One of the claws gives Anor a small wound.
Alice power-attacks the hobgoblin with her axe, missing.
DM62: The hobgoblin grabs his falchion, giving Alice an opening to attack. Alice slices a huge gash in the hobgoblin's shoulder. Her axe brings forth a spray of black blood, spattering the skald.
Silvereye moves past Morna, ending up right behind Anor and Bracken.
DM62: Morna fires another arrow at the hobgoblin, but first, the hobgoblin's armor freezes him some more. The hobgoblin is looking much worse for wear, at this point. Morna fires an arrow. The arrow thunks into the hobgoblin's uninjured shoulder. More black blood flows out, instantly freezing on the armor, but the hobgoblin is still standing.
Gwynne moves 5 feet to just behind Alice, in case of emergency heals.
Anor attempts to Cure Light Wounds, but fails to cast defensively. The wolf-demon claws at him, and he loses the spell. Bracken attacks the wolf-demon with hooves, missing.
DM62: Wolf's up next, attempts to bite and claw at Anor. (rolling) Oof. Wolf misses completely, ending its turn. Alice is up next. The hobgoblin in front of her is looking rather poorly.
Alice swings at the hobgoblin, missing (and cursing her dice).
DM62: The hobgoblin takes another beleaguered swing at the skald. It slices through yet another mirror image.
Duvak uses Evil Eye again on the Hobgoblin (who makes the save, but takes the penalty regardless, which Duvak can chant to extend).
Silvereye draws his wand of CLW from the bandolier and uses it on Anor
DM62: Morna shoots an arrow at the wolf-demon, missing.
Gwynne stands ready to heal people.
DM62: Anor's turn.
Anor misses the wolf-demon. Bracken's bite goes through the space where the wolf-demon was, as it blinks in and out of existence, seemingly.
DM62: The wolf-demon bites at Anor (rolling a critical, but failing to confirm). Alice is up next.
Alice swings her axe at the hobgoblin.
DM62: Alice's axe finds the hobgoblin's throat, and it falls to the ground in a burst of black blood, dying.
Duvak moves twenty feet and uses Evil Eye on the wolf: "And thus one goes to join the spirits. Now beast, you too shall feel the wrath of centuries of Dwarven Ancestors." (The wolf makes the save, but that’s a technicality with Duvak maintaining the chant.)
Silvereye makes rude gestures at the wolf-thing.
DM62: That it?
Silvereye: ((Not much I can do with my spell selection -.-))
DM62: Morna shoots another arrow at the wolf. The arrow passes through the wolf-demon as it blinks out of existence at the right time. Gwynne's up. Oh! I forgot—the hobgoblin's own armor finishes him off, freezing his corpse solid.
Alice: ('-')
DM62: ((The Chill Metal from Silvereye.))
Alice: (I know that)
Alice: (Just feels so awkward)
DM62: ((How so?))
Alice: (No coup de grace :<)
DM62: ((You could always break off the frozen head or something brutal like that.))
Alice: (Would rather borrow a towel to wipe the blood off)
Gwynne takes a double move towards Anor.
DM62: Anor's up next.
Anor casts defensively to heal himself while Bracken hooves the wolf once again (hitting).
DM62: Bohzag comes back to his senses, his fear overcome. He's about ten feet up the mountainside, near the wolf-demon and Anor.
Bohzag looks beneath him at the beast, before shouting a battlecry and leaping off the wall, attempting to land on the beast's back.
DM62: The wolf-demon does NOT blink to avoid the initial grapple. The grapple attempt fails. Bohzag's attempt to grapple fails and he winds up underneath the wolf-demon. The wolf-demon withdraws 30'... Anor and Bracken may take AoOs (missing). The wolf-demon is making a break for it.
Duvak makes a ranged touch attack with produce flame.
DM62: The wolf-demon doesn't like that, yelping as it flees.
Silvereye reaches around the horse to poke Anor with the wand of CLW, again.
DM62: Morna fires another arrow at the fleeing wolf-demon. The arrow passes harmlessly through as the wolf blinks again. Morna moves back 15 feet to get out of Duvak and Gwynne's way.
Gwynne: ((Can't really do anything. Pass. Freaking stupid path. :p))
Anor taps Bracken's neck. "After him." Bracken quickly gallops ahead, attempting to body slam the wolf into the cliff wall. Anor's axe swinging at the wolf.
DM62: The wolf-demon gets an AoO against Bracken (negated by Anor). The wolf blinks in time to avoid the pin. Anor’s attack misses.
Bohzag hoofs it forward twenty feet, shouldering his rifle and firing a shot at the wolf demon (hitting).
DM62: The wound heals instantly. The wolf-demon withdraws up the cliff-face, climbing as though it has magical assistance. Anor and Bracken each get an AoO.
((Dice rolling))
DM62: Anor’s first attack does hit, though most of the damage heals instantly. His second attack passes through the wolf-demon's space. The wolf-demon has moved up twenty feet and left-wards (horizontally) about ten feet. Alice is up next.
Alice double-moves closer to the combat.
Duvak advances twenty feet, doing another produce flame attack.
DM62: Oof. Wolf is more damaged. Silvereye is up.
Silvereye notices the annoying creature is trying to escape, picks up a rock and throws at (missing).
DM62: Morna moves forward, shoots at the wolf-demon (missing).
DM62: .d 1d20+9
Gwynne moves up behind Alice.
DM62: Anor's up next.
Anor: "Bring him down." Bracken keeps pace with the beast before moving ahead a little ways and kicking back with all his might at the rock wall.
Alice: (*ponders how Grease works vs climbing*)
Anor: (Trying to bring the wall and the critter down.)
DM62: ((You're... attacking the mountain?))
Alice: (Don't you have a bow or something?)
Anor: (Yes, to try and cause a mini rockslide to knock it down. I do, but dropped it when the wolf tried to bite Anor's face off.)
DM62: ((Well, it's stone. Hardness of 8. 15hp/inch.))
Silvereye: ((I'm not digging you out if you bring the mountain side down on yourself))
Anor: (Does bashing do extra damage against it?)
Silvereye: ((should've gotten adamantine horseshoes))
DM62: ((Technically a rockslide wouldn't JUST hit Anor.))
Alice: (Rocks fall, party dies)
DM62: ((No, bashing does not do extra damage.))
Anor: (Their fault for following. XD)
Anor: (So should I roll for damage? Not like Bracken can miss a mountain. XD)
Silvereye: ((*slaps Rathuris*))
DM62: ((Well, keeping pace with the wolf-demon means moving forward 5'. Its horizontal movement is perpendicular to the path.))
Anor: Also moved ahead to allow the kick back so I am ahead of it by 5 or 10.)
DM62: ((Make a hit roll anyway. Critical hits or natural 1s still matter in this case.))
Anor: .d 1d20+7
<Internets> :: Total 15 / 27 [55%] :: Results [8] ::
DM62: (You hit the wall. Roll for damage.))
Anor: .d 1d6+4
<Internets> :: Total 7 / 10 [70%] :: Results [3] ::
Alice: (Then again, I'm pretty sure that wolf can beat a DC10 acrobatics...)
DM62: You have failed to damage the mountain.
Anor decides to chuck his axe at the beast (missing).
DM62: Bohzag's up next.
DM62: ((Hrm. "Anor Mountain-Slayer!" :3 ))
Bohzag reaches into his Endless Bandolier and removes two alchemical cartridges, swiftly loading them and aiming at the wolf creature, before firing both barrels at the same time, hoping to drop the creature once and for all (hitting).
DM62: The first shot does leave a small wound. The second heals instantly.
Bohzag: ((GFDI.))
DM62: The wolf-demon scrambles further up--20' upwards, 10' horizontally, putting it 45' from the party (diagonally). Alice is up. It'll reach a small landing and disappear from LOS next round, but it's badly damaged. It seems to be climbing with some manner of magical assistance.
Alice shoots at it with her bow (missing).
Duvak takes a double-moves to get back into line of sight.
Silvereye whistles for Elessar and points at the escaping monster.
DM62: Elessar has been circling overhead in case of need and may attack this round.
Silvereye: The great bird glides down, pecking at the monster (missing).
DM62: Morna takes another shot at the wolf-demon (missing).
Gwynne climbs up after the wolf-demon, advancing 10’ upward.
Anor puts his shield away and draws his long axe. "Come back down here, you cowardly bootlicking mutt! You will make a lovely floor rug!" Anor makes to to hold up a warg skull for the creature to see.
DM62: The wolf does not respond to these taunts. Bohzag's up next.
Bohzag once more reaches into his bandolier and retrieves two cartridges, his trained hands loading his musket's barrels swiftly before he drops to a knee and aims, once more firing off both barrels.
DM62: First shot passes through blinking walf-demon. The second shot hits, doing enough damage to knock the wolf-demon unconscious, and it falls heavily down the cliff side.
DM62: It lands directly behind Bracken, its neck twisted at an awkward angle as it lands upon its head. It is quite dead.
Alice: (It better fucking be.)
Bohzag rises from his kneel, both of his musket barrels smoking as he does so.
Anor grins before hopping of Bracken. "Nice Shot. Guess I better keep my word." Before sitting down to skin the thing.
Alice gives Bohzag a pat on the shoulder "Good shot ol’ sport."
Gwynne: "Thank the gods that thing is finally dead."
Silvereye goes to check the hobgoblin for any magic items (detect magic).
Bohzag: "Let it never be said that my musket is useless."
Silvereye: ((casting Detect Magic))
DM62: On the hobgoblin is a magical falchion, a masterwork composite longbow, a masterwork chain shirt, eighteen arrows, a backpack, a bedroll, a waterskin, 3 days of trail rations, cleats, snowshoes, furs, a pearl, and a black, torn military uniform of some sort, though none you recognize.
DM62: Which head are you mounting?
Anor: (The wolf beast's. And the hobby's if there is no objection.)
DM62: ((And is this stick going in the middle of the rocky pass, or on your backpack?))
Silvereye checks the pearl for magic, then tries to identify the enchantment on the falchion.
Anor: (Most definetly the pass. :D)
DM62: The pearl is non-magical. You're not sure what kind of magic the falchion is.
DM62: There's also a parchment on the hobgoblin.
Silvereye pockets the pearl and checks the parchment.
Anor after mounted the heads along the wall and rolling up the demon skin, Anor will collect his weapons and arrows.
DM62: It is nighttime when the party finishes skinning, beheading, mounting heads, etc.
DM62: The parchment is written in a goblinoid script.
Silvereye hands the parchment to the skald.
Alice takes the parchment, looks at it with a confused look. "I can't read this drabble."
Bohzag takes some time to clean his musket and load it once again while the others are examining the spoils.
Anor: "Guess we camp in the pass."
DM62: The howling of wolves grows louder as night deepens.
Alice: (How far are we from the end of the pass?)
DM62: Of course, the sound echoes throughout the pass.
DM62: ((About a half-mile.))
DM62: The party makes it to the end of the pass for camping. Also, everyone raises a level.
DM62: The night passes uneventfully, and we'll go ahead and stop the session here, though I'm still around for a while to answer questions and take care of bookkeeping.
Last edited:


Has a penis diamiter of 4.5cm
Nov 10, 2008
Re: KaRV Session Transcripts (Edited)

Fifth Session, 18 December (part one, the party crosses the Red Valley, arrives at the keep, and charges in to save a damsel in distress):
DM62: The rain continued last night, and wolves howled all through the night, but nothing attacked the party.
Silvereye gets up early as usual to meditate for his spells
DM62: You had just left the pass behind you, with a half-day of marching over hills and then a day's march through the vast Red Valley, where some of you had some traumatizing experiences in battle last year.
Anor gets up, donning his armour before readying Bracken for the day.
Silvereye finishes his breakfast and casts Extended Longstrider as usual before wildshaping, this time into the form of a lynx, and leaves to scout ahead.
Bohzag is already up cleaning and preparing his weapon of choice by the time Silvereye leaves camp
DM62: Morna is up early, reading the note that the party found on the hobgoblin.
DM62: "Bartouk, track the dwarven expedition. Do NOT engage them. Report back to Post Bravo with your findings. To be clear, your orders are NOT to engage. Respectfully, Major Skekka.”
Anor frowns as he finishes up strapping on Bracken's orders. "Guess he didn't like us skinning his doggies."
Alice wakes up and eats breakfast before studying her Tome of Epics as her meditation for the day.
DM62: Silvereye was heading out to scout ahead. Is the rest of the party following?
DM62: Sergeant Hirschmann calls cadence, and the dwarves resume their forward march through the almost constant rain and the muddy ground. The party makes good time, due to the cadence, and (as Spodah pointed out) will probably reach the Keep by nightfall, or very shortly after. The first three hours are uneventful, and shortly after the fourth hour of marching the party emerges from the hills, finding themselves at the mouth of the Red Valley.
Anor looks about warily.
DM62: Anor, Bohzag, and Sgt Hirschmann readily recall the Battles at the Red Valley, now a little over a year past. In the first battle, the dwarves held strong defensive positions with heavy artillery and a commanding view of the field, taking up a position near the hills to the southwest. They successfully repelled the elven offensives, routing the enemy.
DM62: Then they pursued the elven army northward into enemy territory, where they were picked apart by snipers. It was in the elven forests that Bohzag lost an eye, and maimed an elven sniper (who turned out to be a prince).
Bohzag reaches his left hand up to his eye, sporting a bandage with splotches of red on it in place of his normal eyepatch today. "Why did I agree to return to this cursed place?"
DM62: When the dwarven force retreated, at half strength, they found themselves caught between two elven forces, and were slaughtered almost to a man.
Alice suddenly loses her singing voice and reaches for her canteen, taking a long slow sip...
Anor frowns and pats Brackens neck. The large beast snorting nerviously a moment.
DM62: The biggest controversy over the battles continues to be the actions of General Agathe Reinhardt of Eisenberg, who refused to send her five-thousand troops north. Some believe that her actions cost the dwarves the war. Others maintain that she saved the dwarves from utter annihilation, as following the elves was folly.
DM62: Her brother, the Duke of Eisenberg, recently had her stripped of rank and exiled for cowardice due to this action.
Gwynne, while not a direct participant, did see much of the aftereffects of the fight as the wounded and dead poured into the many temples. She was busy for weeks; running bandages, water, and reciting funerary rites day and night.
Silvereye didn't know much of such battles, was too busy being an apprentice and diplomancing giants.
Duvak takes a long draught of his cigar as he looks over the surrounding area... He himself had not been here, but many a fellow comrade he had urged to war and glory had been. Some were with him even now, perhaps. Either way, he was here as a survivor, even if he had not been here in person.
Alice would rather not remember such memories, knowing full well the horrors of seeing her fellow soldiers falling like leaves before the enemy.
DM62: The ground here has always been somewhat soggy and barren, but the battlefield still holds some rotting signs of warfare. The wooden dwarven battlements have rotten, and are in a state of collapse. Here and there, broken arrows litter the field. The elves were known for being treacherous in battle, but they did show their enemies proper burial, and the dwarven bodies were buried near the elven dead, near a small shrine a little ways north of the valley.
Anor sighed as he looked out at the sights of battle. Remembering those who had fallen.
Bohzag groans as he rubs his left temple as he walks, his musket slung over his shoulder as he tries to drown out the memory of that day.
DM62: It's normally a full day's march through the soggy valley to the keep, but with the Sergeant calling cadence, the party should reach the keep about an hour after dusk.
Gwynne: "I cannot begin to understand what many of you are feeling, but we cannot let these horrible memories consume us. We've overcome this. We can overcome anything." The cleric added with a bit of naive optimism
Anor shook his head with a frown. "It is not something one can easily move on from." Patting his horses neck.
Bohzag: "I have to live with the pain of my own failure every day. Fat chance I'm going to forget it any time soon."
Silvereye is jogging along the rest of the party in his lynx form, cuz not fast enough to keep ahead.
Gwynne: "We are a strong people. We won't be able to lick our wounds forever."
Alice puts her canteen away with a heavy sigh and bitter look in her eyes before clearing her throat
Bohzag: "You Underdwellers are strong. My own family, not so much."
DM62: ((How far ahead of the party is Silvereye scouting?))
Alice: "As much as I'd like to argue against such opinions I'd rather quickly leave this place behind me"
Silvereye: (*an hour)
DM62: ((Noted.))
Bohzag: "On that, we agree."
Alice takes a deep breath and once again begins her cadence.
DM62: As the party resumes their march through the valley, the rain stops. A thin mist hangs in the air, and low clouds cover the sky. It is a very gray day. Every few minutes, the party comes across another reminder of the battle, whether a ruined scrap of uniform cloth, a broken arrow, or a spent musket round.
DM62: Night falls. There's still low cloud cover, but enough moonlight filters through the thin clouds to create low-light. Within about a half-hour of the sun's setting, Silvereye spots what appears to be a large stone structure ahead.
Silvereye: ((How far towards winter are we? I think my wildshape would've lapsed before sunset. It "only" lasts 10 hours, after all))
Alice: (How long is the sun up anyways?)
DM62: ((It's currently 10 hour days, the equivalent of late fall. Probably about a month until snow.))
DM62: ((So Silvereye's wildshape expires at sunset, shortly before he would run across the stone structure.))
Silvereye waits for the others.
DM62: The mist cleared shortly before sunset, leaving the party with fairly good visibility, at least as far as they can see in low light.
DM62: The party catches up to the druid, and the group can make out the stone structure ahead of them. Duvak recognizes the keep.
DM62: During the arduous hike through red ground and bad memories, Morna (herself a veteran of the battles) tried to keep the party's mind off of the ground's history by describing plans for the keep's renovation. There was a village a small distance west of the keep, probably fallen into ruin, but which could be rebuilt for now. The primary plan, though, was to dig out a proper dwarven stronghold UNDER the keep, beginning with large underground water cisterns.
DM62: Some of these cisterns would be used for a fresh water supply, while others would contain underwater trout, to act as a secondary food supply during siege.
DM62: Today, the keep itself seems to be none the worse for wear. It's a sturdy stone structure by human standards. A narrow, rocky track leads up to the main gate. A sheer wall of natural stone is on the left of the track, while the path falls away in a steep cliff to the right. Duvak vividly remembers a time when human and dwarven guards, dressed in plain blue livery, guarded the entrance to the keep, which looks abandoned.
DM62: Okay. Party's reached the keep. Now what?
Silvereye: "Should we wait until morning to go inside? I doubt the place is as uninhabited as it looks."
Anor warily looks the keep over. Checking for lights through the windows.
DM62: No lights are visible from the party's vantage point.
DM62: Is the party using any light?
Alice: (Not me.)
Bohzag: ((I have my Ioun Torch out because I can't sodding see in the dark.
DM62: ((It's currently low-light.))
DM62: ((Enough moonlight gets through the thin cloud cover.))
Bohzag: ((Then I don't have it out of my pack.))
DM62: ((Oh, and how close is the party getting before Alice stops her cadence?))
Alice: (How much did we walk after the valley?)
Anor: (Hopefully out of hearing of the walls.)
DM62: ((The keep is at the northern end of the valley.))
Alice: (So... for how long did we walk after everyone's bad memories?)
DM62: ((I dunno. Did people forget their bad memories?))
Anor: (Nope.)
Alice: (*goes and applies wall to face*)
DM62: ((Not much fighting happened close to the keep, and there are less signs of war as the party approaches.))
DM62: ((Of course, Duvak remembers some bad things that happened here. And some good things.))
Alice: (How far is ear-shot?)
Anor approaches the gate, taking the lead and drawing his bow just in case.
Bohzag follows just behind, his musket ready and his one good eye looking around warily in the low light
DM62: Duvak vividly remembers the elven attack. It was swift and merciless. Elves had silently scaled the walls, making short work of the lightly-guarded garrison. Then the elves turned the light ballistae on the courtyards, using arrows and bolts to bring most opposition to a swift end. Warriors were all slaughtered. Noncombatants were permitted to leave empty-handed.
DM62: ((It's a quiet valley. I'd say your voice could be heard about a mile away.))
Alice: (Well, just outside a mile's range away then, I assume that'd be shortly after we caught sight of the keep?)
DM62: ((In low-light?))
DM62: ((What's the longest low-light vision in the group?))
Alice: (As if you can miss a giant keep on top of a hill even in low-light.)
Anor: (60 feet.)
Silvereye: ((Twice as far as humans can see in low-light, since Duvak has low-light vision.))
Duvak grinds out his cigar as the group gets closer to the keep, stopping for a moment and closing his eyes, as if offering a silent prayer. The last time he had been here, he had left powerless, in his mind, and in disgrace. Now...after finally obtaining power, he had returned. "...Welcome home. Ancestors...and myself. There will not be a repeat of previous events, Dwarven might will see to it." Muttering this, he shakes his head clean of such thought, and lights another cigar once more before moving on...
DM62: As the party nears the gate, a female voice begins to scream inside the keep. It sounds like someone is being tortured or raped or both.
Anor sighs and rushes in. Switching his weapons for his axe and shield.
Bohzag cocks back the hammers on both of his musket barrels. "I believe that is our cue." he says in a hushed voice
DM62: ((So, Anor is rushing in. How fast?))
Alice: (Can we determine how far away the scream is?)
Anor: (My speed is 55. and if it is a run 275 ft. :D)
Gwynne: "One day...Just one day without more of this hell..." Gwynne muttered to herself as she retrieved her weapon and shield. This time, she had her sword instead of her mace. (I'll just follow behind the others. Not too far.)
Alice: (Running is a straight line though?)
DM62: The scream seems to be coming from within the keep. Probably the inner courtyard.
Alice: (So from our current position, how many feet from the courtyard?)
Alice: (We were at the gate at the top of the road right?)
Silvereye does not rush into the unknown. Follows Anor with a steady jog, keeping his quarterstaff on hand.
DM62: ((390' from the gate to the inner courtyard, navigating between buildings in the outer courtyard.))
Alice: (Oh right, INNER courtyard...)
Silvereye: ((So the rest of us will be at least a few rounds behind Anor?))
DM62: ((The technical term is inner bailey.))
Alice: (Considering the rest of us move 80ft at best...)
DM62: ((So how fast is Anor going?))
Anor: (Will stay with 200 ft this round so the rest aren't left too far behind.)
Bohzag: ((I'm following just behind the melee since I only have 50 feet, max.))
DM62: Anor, make a straight d20 roll, applying your intelligence bonus. You want to roll above 12. You're trying to remember the shortest route through a keep that you've only seen on a map.
Anor: 4
Anor: (XD)
Alice: (f-f-failure)
DM62: Anor ends up traveling 600' total, due to not remembering the exact path through the keep and reaching a few dead ends, making a few wrong turns, etc. On the plus-side, if he has to do it again, he'll likely have a much easier go at it.
Alice: (Does anyone else here need to roll that same roll or was that only Anor due to being here before?)
DM62: The party doesn’t need to make the roll. Duvak's with the party, and he used to live here, PLUS he's seen the map. How fast is the party moving?
DM62: ((So. Party arrives at inner courtyard in 5 rounds, Anor arrives in 3 rounds.))
Anor: (I will cast Bull's strength the round I arrive. As Bracken is the one making the full round action. :D)
DM62: ((Violent motion while casting. Concentration DC 15+spell level. Galloping horse is specifically listed. '3' ))
Bohzag: ((*Pretend))
Anor: (I am not moving at his full speed so wouldn't it be vigorous?)
DM62: ((Horse is running, therefore galloping.))
DM62: ((Moving mount is vigorous, galloping mount is violent.))
DM62: ((And I think 200' movement in 6 seconds qualifies as a gallop. That's no easy trot, even for a horse.))
Anor: (For him it is. He could maintain for several hours without tiring. XD
Anor: 15
Anor: (Fail.)
DM62: ((At the current rate of travel, Bracken would complete the Kentucky Derby in 3:20. The track record is 1:59 and change.))
DM62: ((That's a gallop. o.o ))
Silvereye: ((Actually, mounts take lethal damage if they move at hustle, normally. So he'd be pretty tired after an hour and half dead after several - and that's not even close to 200 feet per round unless you have 100 feet move.))
Anor: (He has endurance. :))
Silvereye: ((That doesn't help since mounts don't get to make checks in the first place.))
Alice: (*goes to take a leak before battle*)
Anor: 8
Silvereye casts Shillelagh and Iron Skin while following the others.


Has a penis diamiter of 4.5cm
Nov 10, 2008
Re: KaRV Session Transcripts (Edited)

Fifth Session, 18 December (part two, the party finds itself in an ambush):
DM62: ((Yup. Last round before party arrives.)) The female screaming has stopped for now, and the sounds of melee can be heard coming from the inner bailey.
DM62: The party emerges into the inner bailey, illuminated dimly by moonlight. Anor has just ridden past a worg, and between his sword and the bite of his mount, the worg has expired in a burst of black blood. Chained to the keep fortress wall (location 24) is a female elf, nude and bleeding from bite wounds, unconscious.
Anor: Bracken kicks the worg to make sure it is dead. While Anor hops off to see to the elven maiden.
DM62: Anor has dismounted to see to the elf woman, as Bracken kicks and snorts at the dead worg. Behind the party, the gates to the inner gatehouse slam shut. The party hears a heavy bar slamming down behind the gates.
Bohzag whips around to look at the gate that has slammed shut.
Bohzag: "This does not bode well."
Anor frowns as he hears the gate slam closed. He laid his hands on the elf and cast a cure wounds spell on her to keep her from bleeding to death.
Alice: "So where's the welcome party?"
DM62: The party also notes figures in chainmail and torn, white elven uniforms against the southern wall, advancing slowly with wooden shields and longswords in hand. A voice rings out from the top of the keep fortress in Goblin. The language is unfamiliar to the party, but the meaning is clear enough. Skeletal figures dressed in chain mail and elven uniform train bows from the height of the courtyard walls.
Silvereye: ((I knew we should've waited until morning))
Alice: "Well, that's not very welcoming"
Anor frowns as Bracken gallops over to join him.
Anor: (Transfer Shield cover to bracken giving him +1 ac vs ranged giving him 22 AC.)
Bohzag raises his musket to his shoulder as he begins to notice the skeletons with bows. "Lads........I don't think we're welcome here."
Anor: "Seems that way," counting the number of figures on the wall surrounding them.
DM62: From the center right and center left tower, ballistae are trained on the inner bailey. There's one skeletal archer on the right wall area and one on the left, both in elven uniform with bows, but not behind any real cover.
Anor: "Think they will let us take the lass?"
DM62: There are three figures looking down on the party from the front rounded area of the keep fortress. Two of those are skeletal archers, and one was the fellow giving commands a moment ago. There's a figure visible from the top of the inner gatehouse as well, and two hobgoblin warriors join it at the end of this round, having just barred the exit behind the party.
Bohzag: "Before we're all riddled with arrows, I just want to say that we're all idiots for agreeing to this mission."
Anor: (Are the doors to 22 and 24 open or within running distance of the party?)
DM62: ((No, those doors are both shut tight.))
Silvereye: "No, we're idiots for charging into unknown circumstances because of a scream." Silvereye corrects Bohzag.
DM62: The clouds have cleared somewhat. There's full moonlight, almost as bright as daytime.
DM62: ((And yes. Likely oak braced with iron for the doors, though you suspect that the keep fortress doors are rather thick, being the keep's intended last line of defense.))
DM62: ((And yes, there seem to be ballistae aimed at you. Initiatives!!))
Anor: "Seem there is only one way for this to play out." He points to the doors. "Run!"
DM62: ((Oh, and four figures moving toward the party from the southern wall with sword and shield, in ragged elven uniforms.))
Silvereye: ((are they skeletal figures?))
DM62: ((No, they look a little more meaty, but definitely... deadish.))
DM62: ((2 hobgoblins in armor and uniform arriving at the end of the first round at the top of the inner gatehouse, south of the party.))
DM62: ((Northern towers don't APPEAR to have anyone in them, but then again you're not sure because of the cover they afford.))
DM62: So. One skellie archer on the eastern wall. One on the western wall. Neither have cover. Both using longbows.
DM62: Two skellie archers on the keep fortress, along with a hooded figure who was yelling commands in goblin.
DM62: One hooded figure on the inner gatehouse, two hob archers joining him at end of round.
DM62: Ballistae trained and following party from towers (19) and (20).
DM62: Four elven-uniform and chainmail clad figures moving toward party from either side of the gatehouse.
DM62: At the ground level, the gatehouse has a door on the west and east, and the gates that the party just came through.
DM62: The party can get into a blindspot of one ballista or the other, but unless they all huddle next to the gatehouse or a tower they won't be able to avoid both ballistae.
Silvereye moves to the middle of the group and casts Obscuring Mist.
DM62: A mist rises up around the party (except Anor and Bracken), obscuring all vision beyond 5'.
DM62: So. Bohzag's up next.
Bohzag drops to one knee, shouldering his musket and taking careful aim at the nearest ballistae operator, taking his time to line up his shot and hopefully hit him somewhere vital.
DM62: ((You are leaving the mist, then?))
Bohzag: ((I burn my move action to increase the range increment of the Musket from 40 to 50.))
DM62: ((North, West, or East out of the mist?))
DM62: Bohzag can't currently see past 5'.
Bohzag: ((Oh, I was under the impression the enemy couldn't see us but we could see them.))
Bohzag moves to a better firing position to the west, before shouldering his rifle and taking aim at the ballista operator (missing).
Anor set about getting the elf maiden free. Getting Bracken to kick the chain to help him.
DM62: ((Anor, the chain is hardness 10, 5 hp.))
Bracken has no effect on the chain.
DM62: The party hears shuffling and the movement of figures in chainmail.
DM62: ((You could make a strength break check, at DC 26.))
Anor: (That is the one I meant. XD)
Anor: 17
DM62: ((Nope.))
DM62: At any rate, based on the sound, the armored figures have moved closer to the mist, but haven't entered it yet.
DM62: Gwynne's up next. She suspects that the figures with swords and shields are zombies. She isn't sure how far they are from her right now due to the mist, but a channel energy would definitely do some damage to them.
DM62: But it's a 30' radius, and you don't know how far away they are.
Gwynne moves to cover.
DM62: The entire party, except Anor, Bracken, and Bohzag, are in the 20' radius of the mist, directly in front of the shut (and barred) gate to the inner gatehouse.
DM62: The party hears the twang of arrows. The skeleton on the western wall has a clear shot at Bohzag (missing).
DM62: The two on the fortress keep target Anor, missing by hairs.
DM62: The skellie on the eastern wall shoots at the horse (hitting). Bracken takes 5 damage.
Alice: "So, anyone have any ideas on how to get out of this mess?"
Silvereye: "Start by killing the dead guys again."
Anor: "Run for the bloody doors!"
DM62: The ballista to the West fires at Bohzag (missing). No impaling today, though it brushes by Bohzag.
DM62: The ballistae to the East targets Bracken, missing.
DM62: No love for the other ballista. Also, Anor is dismounted at the moment.
DM62: You hear a voice chanting in Abyssal from the inner gatehouse.
DM62: Duvak's up next. The entire party who's in the mist is in range of the prayer spell cast from the hooded figure on the inner gatehouse.
DM62: So everyone except Bohzag, Anor, and Bracken takes a -1 luck penalty on all attack rolls, weapon damage rolls, saves, and skill checks, for 6 rounds.
Duvak delays action.
DM62: Anor, make a will save, please, from a hex cast by a figure atop the keep fortress. Save DC 17 (fails).
DM62: Anor gets a -2 to attacks for the next 8 rounds.
DM62: Sergeant, you're up.
Alice casts Battle Cry to affect everyone inside the mist and also Bohzag, if he's within 30ft. She also buffs herself with mirror image (4 images).
Duvak blesses the party.
DM62: Silvereye's up next.
Silvereye spends his round casting Call Lightning.
DM62: Roger. Next is Bohzag.
Bohzag fights down his fear of being impaled after a ballistae bolt nearly ran him through, moving furhter west and aiming at the skeleton on the wall who shot at him, before firing off another round from his musket.
DM62: Bohzag’s shot hits. The skeleton is shattered by the musket ball. Anor's next.
Anor: (Can you aid another in ability checks?)
DM62: ((I'll allow it, provided you can explain how you propose to have Bracken apply its strength against the chain binding the elf.))
DM62: ((Here's a hint: if you're pulling on the elf, the elf will break before the chain does. '3' ))
Anor: (By tying the chain to him and pulling.)
Silvereye: ((What are you hoping to accomplish by freeing the elf mid-combat?))
DM62: ((The chains are attached to the elf's wrists and the wall, both of which are above the elf's head.))
Bohzag: ((Ignore the sodding elf and focus on killing the damn zombies.))
Anor: (And Bracken is likely taller than the elf. He is a large horse.)
DM62: ((Are you tying a rope to the chain? Because rope's also likely to break first.))
Bohzag: ((I'm going to systematically annihilate these skeletons with my mighty musket.))
DM62: ((Right, but my point is that there's not enough chain to reach it around any part of Bracken.))
Anor: (Then he will try to pull on it with his mighty neck?)
Anor: (With Anor tugging with him.)
DM62: ((So Bracken is trying to grip the chain with his neck, and then Anor is pulling on the horse's neck as well, to try to break a one-foot chain binding the elf by the wrists to a keep wall.))
Anor: (Anor is pulling on the chain around his neck, not Bracken’s neck.)
DM62: ((I'll let Bracken make the check with a +2 benefit from Anor's aid attempts, but on a natural 1, the horse breaks its own damned neck. Are you okay with that?))
DM62: ((Also, you will forever be branded an enemy of PETA and other animal rights fanatics.))
Anor: (Yeah, killing him off would be bad. What is the hardness of the bracket and the wall?)
DM62: The bracket's hardness is 10.
Anor: (And the wall around it?)
DM62: The stone's hardness is 8, but you're not sure how deep you'll need to dig before the bracket comes loose.
Bohzag: ((No, he's just devoted to saving someone who's of little concern compared to our own survival.))
Anor: (Hm... Guess we will try to break the chain then. Anor will tug on the chain.)
Anor: 29
DM62: Welp. You done broked the chain, hero.
Anor: (Yay! :D)
DM62: Bracken's not exactly pleased to be used in this manner, but you succeed in pulling the chain free. You have a naked elf woman in hand.
DM62: Up next is the zombehs.
DM62: One of the zombies appears in the mists to attack Alice (actually succeeding in hitting Alice, despite the mirror image). Four damage.
DM62: ((I... I never thought it would actually HIT YOU. O.O; ))
Silvereye: ((Oh, 20% miss chance. Since I'm pretty sure she's still in the mist.))
DM62: ((I'll roll 1d5, 1 misses.))
DM62: 4
DM62: ((Still hits. Alice takes 4 damage.))
Alice: (Fuck you thrice)
DM62: Another zombie swings at Duvak (missing).
DM62: And a third takes a swipe at Gwynne (missing).
DM62: The fourth charges at Bohzag, hitting. Eight damage. Gwynne's up next.
Gwynne: (Do I have visuals on the zambies?)
DM62: Gwynne can see the zombie attacking her and another one attacking Alice in the mist.
DM62: The one attacking Alice seems to have drawn blood. The one attacking you missed.
Gwynne: (Last question: Is Alice more than 30 feet away?)
DM62: Behind you, you hear Duvak in combat.
DM62: Alice is right next to you.
Gwynne uses Channel Energy against the undead (7 damage).
DM62: The one fighting Bohzag only took half damage.
Gwynne: "Let the power of the gods sear your wretched skin and purge you from this land." Gwynne chanted as she channeled energy through her holy symbol, knowing the concentration of undead would maximize damage.
DM62: One of the hobgoblin archers atop the inner gatehouse target Anor (missing). The next targets Anor's horse (double critical 20s).
DM62: Oof. Crit confirmed.
Anor: (On Bracken?)
Gwynne: (No horsey no!)
Alice: (You get one more roll to confirm double crit no?)
Anor: (Can't double crit?)
DM62: ((The second 20 was on confirmation. And is double crit a normal rule? o.o))
Silvereye: ((Well, there's a houserule that if you roll three 20s in a row, it's insta-kill, but there's no official rule for doublecrits, no).)
Anor: (I doubt it. XD)
Silvereye: ((suggested houserule, even. At least for 3.5))
Alice: (The last PF campaign I played had them, Idk about houserules)
Gwynne: (Besides, horse gonna asplode if this hits high)
DM62: ((There's no official rule. If you guys want to play with that house rule, I'm okay with it... but Bracken might not want that rule right now.))
Alice: (It's only a horse '3')
DM62: ((All in favor?))
Silvereye: ((aye))
Anor: (Nope.)
Alice: (Eh, Idk really, in favor of not having it or having it?)
Bohzag: ((I vote aye.))
Silvereye: (((weren't we supposed to have crazy crits anyway))
DM62: ((Aye means you want the option for a third critical confirmation for instakill.))
Anor: (with how we roll, it is unlikely to happen for us, and very likely to happen for mobs. XD)
DM62: ((Yeah, that was ShadowWalf's thing... :/))
Alice: (Idk about instakills... but three 20s in a row is very unlikely...)
<Zilrax> (It happens a lot for dms and not so much for players though when it does happen for players I find gms complain.)
Alice: (We did agree on crazy crits tho...)
Gwynne: (We just got 2 :p)
DM62: ((So two ayes, one nay. Bracken would nay if he got a vote, but he'll just have to neigh quietly.))
Gwynne: (I say nay as well, just cause I know my luck is terrible and I'll be victim number 2)
DM62: ((Gwynne, Duvak, Aurani, you guys wanna weigh in here?))
Alice: (I'll vote yes in favor of true dorf fort tradition)
DM62: ((Ninja'd))
DM62: ((Duvak gets the deciding vote. We won't adopt it in a tie.))
DM62: ((Bracken looks at Duvak with pleading eyes. 3: ))
Alice: (*makes plans to open a burger bar later* '3')
Anor: (That an losing animal companions is bad XD)
DM62: ((Sheeeeet is Duvak still online?))
Duvak: ((Yes.))
DM62: ((So... aye or nay? '3'))
Duvak: ((I'll say nay for non-bosses/mooks. Yea for PCs/Boss enemies.))
Duvak: (((As per the way I normally houserule it. Fair enough?))
Alice: (Sounds okay I guess?)
DM62: ((Hrm. I'm going to make a distinction here. Mooks can do it to other mooks. Which means the archer CAN do it to an animal companion, but not to Anor. Is THAT okay?))
Anor: (No. XD)
Alice: (In favor of being able to open up McDorf's burgerbar, yes '3')
DM62: ((If we approve this house rule, it's definitely going to come to a die roll for Bracken.))
DM62: ((And the vote still falls to Duvak, unless someone wants to change their vote.))
Duvak: ((Animal companions aren't mooks lol.))
Duvak: ((They're basically the equivalent of mini-bosses/Half PCs.))
Duvak: ((A 'follower' is a mook.))
Anor: (He is a cavalier's mount. :( He is like his other half. XD)
Duvak: ((No for this applying to Anor, from a random ass hobgoblin.))
Duvak: ((If this was a plot villain, I'd say yes.))
Duvak: ((And no, he doesn't instantly get promoted ALA Nemesis system to a plot villain.))
Gwynne: (That’s kinda true. Having played plenty of Cav's You lose alot of damage potential)
DM62: ((Then the measure does NOT pass.))
Duvak: ((I swear I'll start doing infinite loops.))
Duvak: ((Good man.))
Alice: (So no double crits at all then?)
DM62: Bracken takes 13 damage.
DM62: ((No double crits, at least not at this juncture.))
Alice: (Was that 13 after crit?)
DM62: ((Really, this kind of wheeling and dealing should not take place in pitched combat.))
DM62: ((The hobbo archer curses his dice, which he really shouldn't, considering he used up two of the chat's 20s. xD))
DM62: Two of the skellies on the keep target Bohzag and his boomstick. Both miss.
DM62: One of them targets Anor, missing.
DM62: The ballistae operators duck behind cover while reloading.
DM62: Bohzag, need a Fort save, DC 19. The hooded figure atop the gatehouse has targeted you with a spell.
Bohzag: 16
DM62: Bohzag is blind.
Bohzag ends his Battle Cry effect for a reroll.
Bohzag: 14
DM62: Bohzag is blind.
DM62: Duvak's up next.
Duvak uses Channel Energy, hurting undead.
Duvak: 9
DM62: The one fighting Bohzag takes half damage. They're still up, but looking much worse for wear.
DM62: Anor, need a will save, DC 17. You've been targeted by another hex (succeeds). You take a -2 to your AC for one round. Also, you hear chanting and wicked laughter. Alice is up next. She's got a zombeh in front of her.
Alice starts a raging song with superstition tacked onto it.
DM62: Silvereye's up next.
Silvereye moves out of the mist to get a clear sight of the enemy caster on the inner gatehouse, prepares to blast him with lightning (readying an action to blast the caster atop 18 with a bolt from Call Lightning the next time he does anything).
DM62: Bohzag's up next.
Bohzag flails wildly when his vision darkens, hoping to butt the zombie with the stock of his rifle, having just seen him moments ago, and still able to hear it shambling.
DM62: Bohzag hears the satisfying crunch of his gun butt knocking out teeth and bruising flesh, but the zombie does not yet fall. Anor's up next. How long does it normally take Anor to get into the saddle?
Anor throws the elf up onto Bracken as he mounts up. Shouting at the mist as he kneed Bracken into a gallop to one of the doors at 22.
Anor: (Go through it. If it is locked, smash through it.)
Anor: "Run!"
DM62: ((Now you are ramming your horse into doors?))
Alice: (This can only end in great success)
Anor: (Kicking it down. XD)
DM62: Okay. How long does it take for Anor to mount his horse, normally?
Anor: (Requires a move acttion on Anor's part.)
Alice: (How many rounds passed since we got that -1 luck debuff? 2?)
Anor: (So only a couple seconds.)
DM62: Unless there's a specific ability letting him work faster, that'll take a move action, during which the horse stays still. Moving an inert body ONTO the horse... that's a few more seconds. But I'll allow a standard action to put Anor AND the elf on the horse.
DM62: That leaves a move action. Not enough time for Bracken to move to a door AND kick it down.
Anor attempts to fast mount as a free action (failing)
DM62: And I was GOING to apply a penalty of 5 for the elf woman in your arms, but it seems unnecessary now.
DM62: Standard action for you and the elf woman.
Anor puts the elf on the horse, mounted up and moved to the door. You said I made it to it, but couldn't open or smash it this turn.
DM62: So. The Zombehs attack, hitting Bohzag for five damage and missing everyone else.
DM62: Gwynne's up next.
Gwynn swings at the zombie and misses (natural 1).
DM62: Zombies normally don't laugh, on account of the whole "undead and brainless" thing. But Gwynne misses so hard that she could swear the zombie gives a small chuckle.
Gwynne: "Quiet, you rotting son of a bitch."
DM62: The hobgoblin archers shoot at the druid (missing). The skeleton archers are up next. The two on the inner keep target the druid. The one on the eastern wall shoots at Anor. In that order, rolling (all missing).
DM62: You can hear the workings of ballistae reloading.
DM62: The figure atop the gatehouse begins casting a spell. I assume the druid's going to give him a bit of a shock?
Silvereye frowns and focuses on the hobgoblin, hopefully stopping the spell.
DM62: The hobgoblin glares at the druid as his spell fizzles.
DM62: Duvak's up next.
Duvak channels energy, harming undead.
DM62: Even if they make their saves, that's the end of all the zombies.
DM62: HOWEVER… Duvak, Bohzag, Gwynne, and Alice all need to make fortitude saves, DC 12. It's not a spell or a Will save.
DM62: The zombies explode in bursts of ichor (the party makes their saves).
DM62: Okay. Everyone made their saves. Except for their clothing and armor, which will need washing soon.
DM62: The druid hears chanting, and a shimmering morningstar of force strikes him from behind. Seven damage.
DM62: Alice, you're up.
Alice: "Duvak, any way up to the gatehouse roof?"
Duvak: "...Inside the gatehouse itself, there's a way up. I can also grant you wings."
Alice goes around the west corner and checks if the door's open or can be busted down.
DM62: The door's not budging.
DM62: You gonna attack the door?
Alice: (What's the hardness?)
DM62: It's a strong wooden door, barred. 5 hardness, 20 hp, 25 break DC.
Alice strikes the door (hitting, doing some damage).
DM62: The door takes some damage, but still stands.


Has a penis diamiter of 4.5cm
Nov 10, 2008
Re: KaRV Session Transcripts (Edited)

Sixth Session, 16 January 2015 (part one, the party fights through the ambush):
Silvereye steps just inside the obscuring mist and readies an action to call another lightning bolt when the hobgoblin Shaman casts a spell.
Bohzag calls out for his allies, hoping to hear where they are so he can follow their voices. "Friends! Where are you? I can't see!"
Silvereye: "Over here! Get closer so you don't stand out!"
Bohzag follows the sounds of Silvereye's voice, fumbling his way into the mist in the direction he'd heard it.
Bohzag manages to move just inside of the mist.
Bracken attempts to bash the door in. Bracken fumbles badly. Anor needs to make a ride check.
The hobgoblin archers to the south only have a clear shot at Anor. The first one lodges an arrow in the chevalier's thigh (critical hit, while the second misses. Two skeleton archers target Silvereye in the mists, with one of them hitting. The skeleton archer on the eastern wall has a clear shot at Anor, but his arrow flys wide. The ballistae finished reloading this round, and Alice is in the sights of the western one. It misses. Anor is in the sights of the second, bu it undershot. The ballista bolt sticks in the mud near Bracken's feet. Alice hears chanting above her--the hobgoblin priest has moved to the western edge of the battlements to target the skald. The spell does NOT work on Alice. The shaman's spiritual weapon strikes at Silvereye, missing. The shaman blows on his signal horn, three short blasts followed by one long blast. The party hears a horn blowing in response, probably over a mile west of the keep.
Alice is up next, but as she readies to attack the door, she hears something unlatching on the inside. To her surprise, the door swings inward. Morna is standing there. "I got left behind when the gates shut behind you guys."
Alice stares dumbfounded about this turn of events.
Bohzag hears a familiar voice and pokes around with his rifle, still blind as a bat.
Morna says in a low voice, "I know the way up to the battlements. We can attack the archers and cleric from up top."
Alice then snaps out of it. Alice responds in a whisper "Lead the way"
Having used her standard action, Morna leads Alice up two flights up stairs to the top of the battlements. Alice emerges, her movement spent, directly behind the cleric atop the battlements.
Alice tiptoes up to the Cleric and raises her greataxe up, and Alice's greataxe SLAMS into the priest from behind, slicing open a wide gash in his shoulder.
Silvereye readies action to interrupt the shaman's spellcasting again.
Bohzag fumbles about in the cloud, having absolutely no clue what's going on. Bohzag moves directly south to the wall.
Bracken attempts to bash the door in. The door splinters open.
Anor rides in to find a safe place to lay down his damsel. Anor notes that this is probably where the elf prisoner was kept--the hobgoblins had installed a few sets of wooden stocks. Also, these stables smell strongly of beast and goblin semen. The elf is semi-conscious at this point, but in stable condition. Still, she's in no condition to stand, let alone fight. The elf woman nods weakly, murmuring something in elvish.
"Sh... You are safe now." Speaking in Dwarven.
The hobgoblin guards on the battlements target Morna and Alice with their bows. An arrow sails through another of Alice's mirror images. The other hobgoblin misses Morna. They drop their bows and draw wicked-looking scimitars.
The skeletal archers can only target Silvereye now, but they all miss. The ballistae operators are reloading. The hobgoblin cleric attempts to make a touch attack on Alice. The touch attack hits the real Alice. Alice is sickened for 3 rounds.
Silvereye can barely make out the sound of movement from the northern battlements.
Morna moves to the southern side of the hobgoblin priest, lashing out at him with a dagger but missing.
Alice is next, and her axe bites deep into the gut of the hobgoblin, slashing through mail, flesh, and entrails. Black blood sprays the ground and the sergeant's boots. The priest is still standing, but a trickle of black blood is flowing from his grimace. Lightning streaks across the sky as Alice strikes home, seeming to signify the approval of the ever-watching Gods.
Silvereye's up next. "Bohzag! Follow the wall to the right and get inside," Silvereye shouts before aiming a bolt of lightning at a skeleton archer. The skeleton bursts into bone fragments and dust.
Bohzag hears Silvereye speaking, deciding to follow the wall to the right as the druid had said. Bohzag makes in inside the gatehouse.
Anor hops off Bracken as she marches to the door, switching out his weapons for his bow. Cast gravity bow as he hid beside the open door.
The hobgoblin guards attack Morna and Alice with scimitars, missing both of them completely (and Alice's remaining mirror images.
Two skeleton archers target Silvereye, and an arrow grazes the druid. The ballistae operators are still reloading. The cleric swings a longsword at Morna, giving Morna a gash in her right thigh. Morna slices back at him, and the rogue gives the hobgoblin a second smile, just below his chin, finishing the job that Silvereye started and Alice carried through. The priest collapses to the stone brick floor in a spray of black blood.
Alice swings her axe at the hobgoblin guard next to her, but the axe merely bounces off his shield.
Silvereye blasts another of the skeleton archers with lightning, this time the one who managed to wing him. It explodes.
Anor pokes his head out to shoot at the shaman who had cursed him earlier, but the shaman's not up there anymore. Anor shoots the skeletal archer on the eastern wall, grazing it.
The party can hear a commotion coming from the middle western tower (the other ballista), which is the higher tower at 50'. There seems to be a battle shriek of some sort, then a grunt and sharp curse. A ballista and an armored hobgoblin fall from the tower top. The hobgoblin lands first, and is already close to death when the ballista lands upon him. The armored hobgoblin is crushed. A small figure is atop the middle western tower, screaming incoherently in hysterical triumph. The figure disappears into the tower again.
The hobgoblin guards swing swords at Morna and Alice, missing them (though one of them does destroy a mirror image of Alice).
A skeleton archer shoots at Anor, missing. The priest lay in a pile of blood at Alice and Morna's feet, quietly bleeding out. The ballista to the east is reloaded and shoots at Anor, missing. There is still no sign of the shaman.
Morna slices at the guard fighting her, giving him a nasty cut.
Alice swings her axe about again, beheading a hobgoblin in a spray of black blood. She moves to flank the second hobgoblin.
Silvereye blasts the remaining skeleton archer with lightning and heads towards the open door.
Alice flanks the second hobgoblin.
Anor shoots at the ballista again. The figure working it disappears, with the sound of scampering boots.
The remaining hobgoblin guards lashes out at Morna again, giving her thigh a gash. Morna responds by lodging a knife through the hobgoblin's skull by way of it's eye-socket.
Silvereye climbs up to the battlement, to find that the shaman and the eastern ballista operator both seem to have bravely buggered off. Silvereye finds Morna and Alice standing over three very bloody hobgoblin carcasses.
Silvereye: "There might be more coming. We'd better prepare."
Seeing that the enemies had run, Anor goes to check on the elven woman, covering her in some warm furs from his saddle bag.
The elven woman is clearly traumatized, and recoils from Anor.
Anor: "It is okay. I saved you from them. Here, to warm yourself and cover yourself." Offering the thick warm furs.
A small green figure opens the door from the bottom of the western tower, running up to the remains of the hobgoblin who fell and then had a ballista land upon him. Shrieking with insane rage, the figure has brought a rock with it, which it uses to enthusiastically crush the remains of the hobgoblin's head into a pasty mess. Having hit it about ten times, the figure drops the rock and falls to the ground, weeping and laughing hysterically.
Bohzag is currently up against the door, afraid that there are still enemies "Anor? Is that you? What's going on?" he speaks in Dwarven.
Alice peeks over the wall.
The elf woman tentatively takes the furs, covering herself and nodding. She still seems shaken up (obviously).
Anor: "Are you still hurt?" Looking at her with concern.
The green figure appears to be a regular goblin. Possibly a female. Dressed in rags, clutching its sides and... weeping? Laughing? You are unsure.
The elf woman simply looks at Anor. She doesn't seem to know a word of human nor dwarven language.
Alice is kinda scared shitless about that little goblin.
Anor put his weapons away and then slowly approached her to take one of her hands gently.
Alice also casts Prestidigation on herself to get rid of all the blood.
The elf woman cringes and jumps back from Anor's touch, saying something in elven rapidly and shaking her head.
Bohzag realizes there are no sounds of battle anymore "Friends? Is the battle over yet?" he calls out in Dwarven, still unable to see.
"For now. How are you holding up?" Silvereye replies.
Bohzag: "The whole world is dark. I can't see at all! How do you THINK I'm holding up?"
Anor (to the female elf): "I only wish to heal you." Holding out his hand for her to take it.
Alice goes downstairs and leads Bohzag up the stairs.
The goblin is slowly coming back to its senses, sniffing the air and looking about curiously.
Bohzag is lead up the stairs, fumbling rather clumsily without his ability to see.
The goblin spots Alice and Morna atop the battlements, and drops its rock.
Silvereye: "Does any of you speak goblin? I think someone should talk with that one."
Goblin: "No fights! No fights! No fights! Okay!" It yells up in crude Dwarven.
Alice: "Well... looks like she's not keen on fighting us at least"
It has a rather shrill voice, and Alice is... reasonably convinced that it is a female. Seems to be covered is welts and bruises, though.
Anor held out his hand to the elf. "I wish you no harm. Only to heal you."
The elf woman still cringes, but lets Anor touch her hand for a moment.
"Do you need help? Some food, perhaps?" Silvereye yells back at the little one.
Anor lets his hand glow as he casts a cure spell upon the elf. "See?"
Goblin: "Help? Help! Help! Uh... Yes! I help!" The goblin runs into the tower. Moments later, it emerges onto the battlement wall, bringing over a mop and a bucket full of water.
The elf woman nods, looking considerably less pale. Anor doesn't know what she's saying, but is willing to bet that she appreciates the healing. She's still jumpy and recoils from any contact.
Silvereye offers the goblin a chunk of elk. "Are there many more hobgoblins in the fortress?"
Goblin: "Yes."
Silvereye: "How many? And where?"
The goblin points at the dead hobgoblins.
Anor lets go of her hand and moves away to pat Bracken's saddle. Beckoning her to him.
Silvereye: "No, I mean living hobgoblins."
Goblin: "Two. And two. And two. And two." It thinks for a moment, then holds up three fingers. "Two."
Morna is on the ground, rolling and laughing.
Alice is certain that it's a goblin. 90% certain that it's a female, though she'd have to look at its naughty bits to be 100% sure.
Bohzag: "Can someone please tell me what's going on?"
Alice: "Well Morna is 'avin a giggle."
The elf maiden is still kind of recovering and sitting there, watching Anor cautiously.
Alice: "And there's a goblin with a mop and bucket."
Anor: "Come with me." Patting Bracken's saddle and beckoning her to them.
Silvereye: "A friendly goblin that killed one of the ballista operators wants to help."
Alice goes to check on Anor.
"Help! Help! Help!" The goblin begins mopping up the black blood on the stone brick, inadvertently spreading the mess. "I help!"
Bohzag is still clutching his musket in his hands, his head tilted back slightly as he looks around "And why am I still shrouded in darkness?"
The elf woman rises slowly, following Anor cautiously. She declines to ride (she's naked apart from a fur cloak, after all, and a recent torture/rape victim) but follows him out of the stables.
Silvereye: "I don't have the spell to cure you right now. You'll have to wait until morning."
Bohzag: "Perfect."
Anor gives her a reassuring smile as he steps out with her. Waving for alice to join them.
Bohzag: "Vile creatures. A pox upon them and their kind."
Morna manages to suppress her giggles long enough to ask the goblin a few questions in its language, making the goblin's mouth open wide with shock.
Alice: "So, the fair... maiden? Is alright?"
The goblin stands there dumbfounded for a moment, then begins speaking rapidly in goblin.
Anor: "Yes, I healed most of her wounds. Can you speak elf?"
Alice turns towards the elf, "Are you alright?"
The elf woman nods. "Thank you for saving me. I was a prisoner here for three days. Is the goblin alright?"
Elf Maiden: "Please ensure that no harm comes to her. She seems a creature of ridicule, but she saved me more than once by distracting the hobgoblins. She was kept here as a slave, for sex and for cleaning."
Alice also takes a proper look on the Elf's current appearance
DM: The elf is MUCH better off than when you first saw her. She's still pale (her natural color) but less... dying-like and more just naturally pale. And she's got fur on, now. Apart from that... she's toned and lean. You'd have to make a knowledge (local) check to figure out more.
Silvereye tosses the dead hobgoblins down into the courtyard and walks down, making a single pile out of the corpses to be dealt with later.
The elf appears to be a warrior of some kind. Based on her visible musculature, you'd guess she's accustomed to long hikes, long rides, and regular bow usage. She's definitely in need of a bath. And the furs that Anor gave her are the only clothing she seems to have.
Bohzag reachs a hand out and slowly makes his way back down, one step at a time.
Anor: "You should probably ask her, her name and where she is from."
Silvereye notes that the elven zombie guards were dressed in some kind of garrison livery.
Alice: "My name is Alice, your savior over here is Anor, what's yours?"
But the skeleton archers were dressed rather differently. And their garment and armor looks quite a bit older and uncared for.
Bohzag fumbles the last step, tripping and faceplanting in the doorway to the courtyard. A keen listener might hear "A pox on all Hobgoblins" muffled by the dirt and his sizable beard.
Anor nods to the elf woman at his name.
Silvereye inspects the respective remains of the undead closer. "Looks like the zombies were the elves who held the fortress last, while the skeletons were older corpses, likely from before the war."
Elf Maiden: "My name is... Darya. Of the House Akulov."
Silvereye notes the unit insignias on the elven corpses, but as he wasn't in the war he's unsure as to any further meaning.
Nevertheless, the skeleton archer liveries are also somewhat stained with reddish clay.
Anor: "We should get her inside. Perhaps her cloths or someone clothes are inside. And she can wash up."
Bohzag manages to stand, placing his musket on his back as he slowly makes his way out into the courtyard, his arms in front of him as he does so, moving slowly and carefully.
Silvereye: "Anor, I'd like you to take a look at the uniforms. It might be important."
Anor: "Sure." Going over to take a look.
Morna joins the group in the courtyard, the goblin following very closely.
Alice: "How did you end up here?"
DM: Anor is reasonably certain that these were originally combatants from the Battles of Red Valley.
Anor: "They were bodies taken from the battle here."
DM: One of the insignia markings match a unit that Anor fought with during the war, and the clay's a dead giveaway.
Silvereye: "Then maybe the elves never held the fortress, after all. That's why they're so eager to give it back."
Bohzag growls as he hears of this, having resigned himself to leaning against a nearby wall. "The mongrels. There is no excuse for disrespecting the dead!"
Darya: "I was on a long patrol, heading out to meet the last elven guards, who were vacating the keep. The hobgoblins had an ambush set. An evil one named... Bartouk. He and a wolfdemon took me prisoner and brought me here."
DM: The elven zombies, however, are dressed in garrison livery. No signs of red clay.
Anor: "Perhaps. Or they simply lost contact with it's garrison." Shrugging. "I will be checking the keep, making sure it is clear." Heading to make sure the keep is empty.
Alice: "Oh, that guy, you can rest assured, I made sure he had a painful death, and his pet is no longer in this world either."
Darya: "Well, that's a relief. He didn't stay at the keep for long. I don't think the cleric and Bartouk got along."
Alice: "Well now, how about we get you cleaned up and find you some proper clothes?"
Anor is already heading to the keep to make sure it is safe.
Silvereye: "We should find some place to hole up until the morning. One of the towers?"
Bohzag: "I agree. I'm useless until I regain the use of my eye."
Morna speaks up. "The goblin's name is Nop. It's... she's female. Apparently the hobgoblins pretty much kept her around for cleaning, beatings, and rape. She's also... unofficially... requesting asylum. I think the hobgoblins are likely to kill her if they meet her again, or just re-enslave her."
Alice: "That seems to match what our elf over here said as well, she insists that the goblin is kept safe."
Morna: "As for hostiles, the forces we fought were what they had. There was a pair of guards stationed a mile to the west with worgs, but apparently the shaman gave them the signal to report back to another warcamp."
Bohzag: "I have no objections to a goblin sticking around as long as she pulls her weight. She might be useful if we can ever get this cursed place manned."
The party finds that the rest of the keep is empty, apart from another dozen rotting elf guards, in keep livery, kept at the top of the southwestern tower.
Morna: "She says that she can cook and... um... sing. I don't think I want to hear her sing." Morna looks at the rest of the party.


Has a penis diamiter of 4.5cm
Nov 10, 2008
Re: KaRV Session Transcripts (Edited)

Sixth Session, 16 January 2015 (part two, new friends, gifts, and a dire warning):
Anor: "The keep is safe. Alice can you look after the elf and the goblin? See that they get washed up and fed? And clothed?"
Silvereye: "Another warcamp. Great. And the other spellcaster probably escaped, too. We need to plan for attack the first thing in the morning."
Bohzag groans. "Will this torment ever end? Now we have to defend against even more of the cursed beasts."
Morna: "She can also clean. And given that I don't want to taste her cooking, I suggest that she be placed in a purely custodial role here."
Anor: "I would do it my self, but she seems scared of me. Also, you speak elven, and I do not."
Silvereye goes to explore the rest of the main keep.
Alice: "I'm not sure if her fear comes from us being dorfs, or the fact you're a man."
Bohzag: "Probably both."
Anor: "Likely both."
The elf is pretty much scared of being touched by anyone right now, but seems to feel better after a bath and after she finds some clothing. As soon as she eats, she expresses to Alice her need to return North, to report the situation here.
Bohzag: "Tell her to give my regards to the elf prince if she comes across him. He'll know what I'm talking about when she mentions the missing eye."
Darya: "I need to report this hobgoblin aggression, as well as the gallantry shown by your group." She gives a shy look at Anor.
Anor: "She can't leave until we deal with the war camps. They will likely try and retake the keep."
Alice scratches her head.
Silvereye would prefer not to trust an elf.
Morna raises an eyebrow. "Might not be a bad idea to let the elves know about the hobbos, though. And unless she's a prisoner, not sure how we justify keeping her here."
Alice: "Would it really be safe to let her go alone though? She already got caught once..."
Anor: "The war camps will scoop her up if she goes alone. Not to mention try to come here to get their keep back."
The party also learns that the nearest hobgoblin warcamp is several days to the west. Apparently the goblin was a slave there before she was a slave in the keep.
Silvereye: "I for one don't trust the camp to be where it was."
Anor: "Nor I. I say we hold up here and prepare for them to attack us. I doubt they will let us taking it go lightly."
Silvereye: "The outer gate seems like a likely place to fortify. Unless they want to climb cliffside, it's the only way in, after all."
Anor looks at the elf before turning to Alice. "Can she fight, and is she willing to help us until they are dealt with?"
Morna speaks up. "I hate to say this, but we're a handful of dwarves and one elf. We need reinforcements. If Nop is anywhere close to being correct, the warcamp is the nearest of many."
Bohzag: "If there is an entire warcamp of them, we can't hold this place with just us. We need to send word back to Axtkopf, and inform them that the Keep is under threat of Hobgoblin invasion, and that they might need to send an army detachment."
Anor: "Think you can get back before the hobs descend on us?"
Silvereye: "I can send Elessar with a message. He can make the trip in a couple days."
Morna: "If I ride south to Axtkopf, I can try to gather up more dwarves, as well as supplies. After all, there's not much food here that isn't... elf meat."
Anor: "What would be faster, your eagle or riding south?"
Morna: "Also, and I never thought I would say this, we might let Darya try to bring back some elves. We ARE supposed to be at peace now."
Anor: "We could, but alone, she may not make it."
Silvereye: "The roc flies faster and straighter than a horse."
Alice suspects that the elf earnestly wants to help the dwarves, though also desperately wants to return home. She also believes that she's not lying when she suggests that she can send back elven reinforcements.
Anor: "They way back may be clear for us, but we do not know what lays between us and the elves."
Anor: "That I believe."
Bohzag: "It cannot be any worse than staying here and being beseiged by hobgoblins."
Alice: "If she goes home she may be able to send help our way, we're fairly close to the elven border after all."
Bohzag: "I say we allow the elf to return to her lands, and hopefully bring back reinforcements."
Anor: "But so are the enemy camps."
Morna: "Also, Elessar won't carry as much weight as I will, when addressing the Duke of Axtkopf. There's no guarantee that the dwarven guard who receives the eagle's message will even take it seriously."
Bohzag: "After all, I do have some kind of relationship with their Prince. As to WHAT kind it is, that's to be discovered."
Alice: "If those hobbers have a whole warcamp waiting we'll be severely outnumbered."
Silvereye: "Do we have the right to make that call? A force of dwarves meeting a force of elves, even united against a common enemy might be risky."
Anor: "Besides, the elves ceded these lands to us."
Bohzag: "We are at peace. I'll personally put myself between the two forces if I have to preserve that."
Morna speaks up. "This might be bigger than we initially thought, though. Nop said it was the nearest of the warcamps. That means we could be at war soon. And not with the elves."
Silvereye: "Elessar would be taking the message to my family, or my master, if he's in Axtkopf still. But you're right, even with our seals it may take time before it is taken seriously."
Bohzag: "Sergeant, would you ask her a question for me?"
Anor: "If we do send her off to her lands, she will likely need someone to accompy her. We do not have any horses to spare."
Bohzag: "Ask her if she or anyone she knows is friends with the Prince. Chances are she might have a lot more sway if she does."
Alice is unfamiliar with the Darya's House Akulov.
Silvereye: "We do not have dwarves to spare, either. Even in four days, it will take hard work to fortify the defences."
Anor: "Hm... Then it may be best to send for dwarves. We know our messanger will arrive safely and alive."
Alice relays Bohzag's question.
Darya: "There are several Princes within the Elven Kingdoms. Of several Kings and Queens. To which Prince is the Musket Master referring?"
Morna speaks up. "The prince's translator introduced the prince as 'Jahanyar Mahijarani.' Though you may wish to mention the mangled ear."
Bohzag draws a blank on the Prince's name, before Morna pipes up. "Aye. I should know. I was the one what gave it to him."
Darya's eyes open a little wider at the mention of the mangled ear. "I have heard that name." She smiles. "Heh. That's a tricky one. Did the prince travel with a mage and a translator?"
Bohzag reaches up his left hand and touches his bandaged eye, memories of the war coming back to him.
Alice: "Aye, he did."
Darya: "The translator is the prince. His name is Yousef Vazir. Jahanyar Mahijarani is one of his war captains, and often masquerades as the prince. I remember hearing about his ear."
Bohzag takes his hand away from the bandage, rubbing his fingers together as he feels wetness, the injury having started bleeding again.
Darya: "Prince Vazir is also the greatest of the elven generals. It was he who made the strategic decisions in our war with you, and eventually he decided that it was better to pursue peace. They carry on this masquerade regularly in foreign lands."
Bohzag: "Bloody hell. Can't even trust a healer to fix this properly."
Darya: "With that said, my father is Alexei of the House Akulov. And he does have the ear of Prince Vazir, even though they are... from different... peoples."
Morna translates for the group. Bohzag remains silent as Morna translates, before he bursts out laughing. "I can rest easier knowing it was a hardened veteran what took my eye, and not some lucky princeling!"
Anor: "Then we should definitely not send her alone. Her getting killed could cause more problems then it will solve."
Bohzag is actually laughing rather heartily.
Alice: "The hobbers are to the west, the Elves should be due north of here, she's unlikely to run into the warcamp."
The elf woman looks to Morna to translate what's being said, then responds to Morna.
Silvereye: "IF the warcamps are still where we think they were."
Darya: "If it makes you feel safer, take me one day East, across the river. From there, I will be safe in Elven lands. Remember, we elves live to the North AND to the East of you."
Alice: "And from what I can tell, she's probably not unfamiliar with weapons"
Anor: "Hm... We could do that. If need be, I could take her that far. Bracken is strong and swift."
Alice: "Anything that crosses the White River comes into aim of elven arrows. Anything. Get me to the river, and I will be safe. And should the hobgoblins attack before my return, and should you need to flee, come East and mention my name. No harm will come to you, providing you bring no harm with you."
Bohzag: "I believe we should do as she asks. Take her across the river, and let her return to her people. And, hey, maybe I'll get to see that elf whose ear I mangled and who took me eye."
Morna speaks up, "Aye. Perhaps. But I still think I should also travel south, to see what help I can bring from our own kind."
A flake of snow lands on Bohzag's cheek.
Anor: "Sounds like a plan. I and Bracken can take her. He is pretty swift and knows these lands."
Bohzag reaches up and touches his cheek "Oi? Who just touched me?!"
Anor: "And if she is attacked, she will have a better chance to get through. Should only take us a whole day to get to the river and back."
Silvereye: "We'd better get inside."
Darya nods at Anor's idea upon translation. Morna suggests that the ballistae are more trouble than they were worth, and that the hobgoblins were fools to use them.
Bohzag: "Aye, they are. You want a real siege weapon, you use a Bombard with alchemical fire in the payload."
Silvereye heads inside, regardless of what others do.

DM: Alright. Time to have an OUT OF GAME DISCUSSION. :3 You've taken possession of the keep. Congratulations.
Aurani (Alice): It's only a model.
DM: Shh! I believe the party's sending Darya to the Elves and Morna to the Dwarves, keeping Nop around as basically a janitor.
Hentaispider (Silvereye): Something like that, I guess
DM: And apart from that, the plan is to fortify the keep as best they can.
Rathuris (Anor): Can I swap out endurance then? As it does nothing for him.
DM: Yes you can.
Hentaispider: Starting with the outer gate, and possibly the road that leads to it.
DM: Now. Here's a fun spoiler. You're going to spend the next week fortifying. The elves are going to arrive first, within about four days.
Caulder (Bohzag): Bohzag has Knowledge (Engineering), if that helps in any way.
DM: Several times, the party's designated lookout will report a single worg rider, or a pair, barely within eyesight of the keep, to the west. Any attempts to pursue these riders proves fruitless, even if Elessar gives chase, as they rapidly vanish into the hills and caves of the western area.
Aurani: Barely within eyesight? I'm guessing that's far more than 400 feet eh?
Hentaispider: And we don't have the manpower to set up an ambush. Typical.
Rathuris: Though we can set yup several ambush points within the keep.
DM: Within about ten days, Morna's going to return with some reinforcements. Not exactly a legion, but enough that the party can post sentries and whatnot.
Caulder: Is the elf Captain among the elves that arrive, BTW?
Aurani: Who knows? '3'
DM: Do we have time for that encounter tonight?
Aurani: Depends how sleepy Spida is.
DM: I'm guessing Spodah needs to retire for the evening fairly soon.
Rathuris: I will keep endurance, as it is a prequisite for a later feat I will get Bracken.
Hentaispider: I can stay for about an hour.
Aurani puts Spider on head.
Rathuris: Does Darya return as well?

DM: Well, you hear elven horns about midday on the fourth day. At this point, there's about a foot of snow covering the ground. The party spots a unit of about fifty elves, mounted, moving rapidly from the North toward the keep, their white banners flapping in the cool morning breeze. The elves ride upon dire snow leopards. At the front of the cadre is a figure in a gleaming mithral breast plate, wearing a thick winter cloak and hood. They stop in formation, about fifty feet from the keep's gates.
Anor rides out to greet to the elves. Hopefully with a translator.
Bohzag is on guard atop the gates to the keep, staring down at them with his good eye.
Before Anor can ride out, a voice calls out in broken Dwarven. "Lord Alexei, of the House Akulov, requests a speaking with the masters of the Red Keep!"
Anor rides with the bigwigs then.
DM: So Anor's riding out and Bohzag's keeping a watchful eye.
Alice comes along to translate.
Silvereye is somewhere near-ish.
The elves are all hooded, armed, and armored. The figure in mithral mutters a command to the translator, who speaks it more loudly. The fifty riders dismount in unison.
Anor dismounts as well.
Bohzag hefts his musket onto his shoulder, trying to look as passive as possible.
Alice recognizes the extreme military discipline of the unit, being a sergeant and whatnot.
Anor looks to Alice. "Well, aren't you going to invite them in?"
The figure in mithral removes his hood, revealing chiseled elven features and the white hair of the snow elves. His age is indeterminable. He voices something to his translator. "Tell them that we come in peace, and that I wish to speak to Anor, of the House Urthal."
The elven translator stumbles over Anor's household name, having heard it only incorrectly and second-hand. "We come to for the peaces, and wish speakings with Anor of Oofal. Urfal. Awful."
Anor approaches a few steps. "I am Anor of clan Urthal." Looking to Alice to translate.
Lord Alexei gives a slight, sharp bow to Anor as they are introduced. "My daughter tells me that you saved her personally, taking great personal risk to see her safely removed from harm, even as your gallant companions fought back the hobgoblin heathens."
Translator: "The daughter that is of my master Alexei tells me that you were personable savings, and risk great of taken to remove her from safely being harmed. And that your galloping friends fighted with the hobbers of gob heavens."
Anor nodded. "Only doing my duty, and saving an innocent from harm."
Alice is trying her best to hide her amusement over the translator's mistranslations.
Alexei: "Then it is my pleasure to present these gifts to you. First, for your companions. I understand that dwarves appreciate the glitter of gems and coin, and I have brought a few quartermasters who might exchange your... monies... for equipment of use." A small team of elves bring out several pouches full of small gemstones and coins of varying types (to be determined later).
Anor gives him a thankful nod.
Translator: "I am pleasing to be a present of the gifts of yours. The first companions of the gifting for the dwarves of coin and gewelry... gews... jewelry. And teams of inventories of things for the coins."
Anor really wants to facepalm as his tongue is brutalized. The translator looks a bit... overwhelmed. Alice suspects he'd appreciate the help.
Anor: "Alice can you tell him our companions are grateful for his gifts?"
Alice finishes translating for Anor... and hears a slight titter from one of the elves in the front rank. Alexei gives a sharp look at the hooded elf, who immediately snaps back to attention, and silence.
Alexei: "Next, I have a few personal gifts. In place of money, I have brought something that you might appreciate more, being a man of action."
Alice smirks at the soldier being corrected.
Anor waits to see what is presented.
Two soldiers bring out a large item bundled in white silks, and unveil a breastplate forged of mithral, with intricate working and designs carved into the metal.
Alexei: "My armorer will see to it that you are fitted to the armor."
Anor give a thankful bow. "It is a thoughtful gift. It will see much use soon." Accepting the gift. "Come, a warm hearth and warm food awaits inside."
Alexei: "I am not quite finished, however. I also name you, Anor of House Urthal, Elf-friend. You and your companions will always be welcome in the North, so long as you bring no ill intent with you."
Anor bows again. "Thank you, you honour me."
The translator actually hesitates before translating that. He nervously adds an addendum: "It is title... never been given. In... centuries."
Alexei: "Finally, I understand you like to play with wolves."
Anor: "Seems to be a habit of late." Giving him a nod.
A soldier brings forth a sack, and Alexei reaches in, dumping two recently-skinned worg pelts at Anor's feet. Along with a hobgoblin head.
Alexei: "These foul creatures were stalking the keep, from the West. You were wise to send my daughter East. She wanted to thank you personally, but I forbid it, ordering her to rest among her family."
Alice suddenly feels rather relieved we made peace with these Elves
Anor gives the hobgoblin's head to another dwarf to stick above the gate. "Glad to hear that. Come let us warm ourselfs by the hearth and prepare to pay the hobbers back for their crimes."
Alexei: "I regret that I cannot stay to enjoy your hospitality. There is a Great Council meeting to the East, and I must attend, to recommend that the elves prepare themselves to fight against a new threat. But I will leave you with a small group of scouts, to keep an eye on the outskirts for trouble. You will be warned of any approaching threat. And I must also leave you with a warning. Possibly dire."
Anor gives a small nod.
Alexei: "I can tell you that we keep a close eye on your dwarven settlements. The dwarf you sent south, Morna, may or may not return with ill tidings. I am afraid that Eisenberg is preparing its army for conquest."
Anor: "That is dire news indeed. Thank you for the warning."
Alexei: "Axtkopf, on the other hand, is NOT prepared for conflict. Do you understand my meaning?"
Anor: "I do indeed."
Alexei: "I must leave you and your honored companions, Anor Urthal, Elf-Friend. I bid you all safety in these troubled times of bloodshed." Alexei mounts up, and all but six of his troops follow suit. The dire snow leopard mounts bound swiftly to the east, with a speed that makes Bracken twitch a bit.
Anor: "Come lets get you settled in then." Speaking to the elven scouts and looking at each curiously.
At this point Nop runs up to Bohzag, clutching him in fright. "ELVES! ELVES! There's ELVES!"
Bohzag attempts to calm the goblin "Yes, but they are friends. Friends."
Two of the elven scouts mount up and begin their patrol. The other elves follow Anor, giving slight bows as they enter the keep. One of them speaks Dwarven, at least enough to communicate in rough terms.
Nop: "I was help! I help! Then saw elves! Elves!"
Anor gets them settled with a fire and some warm food before returning to work on fortifying the keep.
Silvereye plays for a bit with the mounts, making sure they have food and stuff.
Two of the elves sit at the fire, eating sparsely. The other two move to help with the fortifications. For the rest of their time there, the elves work in shifts. At any given time, two are on patrol, two are resting or eating, and two are helping the dwarves prepare for war.
Nop eventually calms down and returns to shoveling snow.