Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

[shotgungunshot]

An ancient manor lost to time stood deep in the forest, few dared to even venture near it any more. Years and years ago it was known as the Starfallow manor, where a well known elven healer had lived. However, one day she disappeared completely, and with no one around to care for the ancient manor, it slowly fell into a state of decay. Wooden beams had cracked and broken, moss had started to grow across it, some windows were broken from storms or even younger, more devious people looking for a bit of fun. Most avoided it however, for rumors had started to crop up about the house still being 'inhabited'. Stories were whispered between people at the nearby town, about their being a spirit there eternally haunting the halls, stories of doors opening without anyone being there, or when lightning struck, a shadow of a person barely being visible in a window. Of course, no one had complete proof considering that the regular townsfolk were too frightened to ever try to enter the manor. Some theorized that the healer had plans on coming back one day, and had asked a spirit to remain behind to guard the manor, others thought it was just a wandering forest spirit that couldn't move on to the afterlife, either way, the people of the town almost unanimously believed the manor to be haunted.

Anyone coming to investigate would find an unlocked, rusty gate, yet another thing falling to the eventual passage of time. The area around it had become overgrown with plants, as though the forest around the manor was slowly trying to take it back. An examination of the front of the manor would show that the steps leading to the front door were weak from water damage, and the front door, while once being a pure white, was now stained brown from rain and sunlight, time and time again, weakening the structure. Other than that, nothing would immediately stand out, seemingly being just a regular abandoned manor on first glance.

 

[Pervy]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

A few years ago

Spoiler

Spoiler

"Welcome to the Gravenholme cementary everyone. We have gathered today to mourn the passing..." Alicia Gravenholme spoke seriously, if a bit hastedly, still holding her shovel. In these lands, it was tricky to keep the undead underground and right now she was pretty sure she could hear..

Spoiler

"Braaaaaains!" Yes, exactly that. The few citizens that had the bravery to gather, after some conviction, screamed out as the ground of another grave broke open. "Damn it not now you rotting bastard! Stay down old man Jenkins!" Alicia growled, twirling her shovel, smacking it down.. again.. and again.. panting slightly when she was done, shouldering her digging implement, still bloodied. She had gotten rather good at doing this but..

Spoiler

"Damn it, someone needs to make sure these creatures stay were they belong. My family name is in tatters already.. but all the heroes just end up joining over short or long, because no one has a clue how to deal with.." she hesitated, and looked at her shovel, as well as the bludgeoned zombie. She rubbed her chin and hesitated. "Hmnn..." She WAS rather good at this...

~Present Day~

Whistling an

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Alicia Gravenholme the second made her way through the forest. This place looked like it was bad for literally everyone elses business. which ment it might be good business to her.

Frankly, putting the undead to rest was the easy part. Finding their relatives and getting the bill paid was harder. She didn't force the issue, but if she wasn't paid, she simply departed, not offering her services nearby again. And she had gotten really good at what she did, to the point where her own abilities in the proper funeral department closed in on the supernatural.

Alicia pushed the gate before her open without fear, her eyes wandering over the overgrown ground thoughtfully as she tapped her shoulder with her trusty shovel. Should she prepare a grave already, she pondered? She decided against this. She needed to know the measurements of the potential spirit and.. with ghosts, that normally ment looking for remains to put to rest.

Any observer would notice the utter lack of fear from Alicia as she approached the front door, adjusting her outfit, always well mannered as one had to be, in her profession. Even if, at best, she expected no response, at worst, a ghoul jumping on her. Oh well.

She knocked on the door, one. two. three times, then, with a calm, clear voice said: "Greetings, and my condolences. It appears that yonder unlives someone in need of a proper burial. I come to offer the Graveholmes families esteemed services for a minor fee. Do note that complicated burials, such as vampires, mummies, wraiths and comparable may incur additional procurement fees. Considering logistics your current fee would be 17 pieces of silver." she looked at bit of brown lichen stuck on her hand fromt he door, then added: ".. 18 pieces."

 

[shotgungunshot]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

While she may not be afraid, Alicia would get the feeling that she was being watched the moment that she walked past the gate. From her window, a spirit watched over her, though without any light to cast a shadow, it'd be extremely difficult to get a look at her. It was so rare that she got visitors any more, which was actually fine with her, as she preferred to be left alone. With the way things were going, however, it meant that she'd have to get rid of whoever this woman was, and return to everything that she had been doing.

The good news was that no ghoul would jump out at Alicia once she knocked on the door, but she did manage to get some sort of response. If she listened extremely carefully, she'd hear an unearthly whispering, quiet and otherworldly, clearly the voice of a ghost. It was almost as though the wind itself were carrying the voice, rather than any sort of actual person. If Alicia didn't listen carefully, then she might completely miss the voice anyway. "Goooo... awaaaaayyy..." Well, if it wasn't obvious that she wasn't wanted there, Alicia would know now.

After that, the ghost would fall silent, watching to see if the visitor would heed her warning or just continue pressing on. If Alicia tried the door, she'd find it was unlocked, so if she planned on continuing it wouldn't be any issue. Inside was the main hall, looking just as destroyed and decrepit as the outside, with frayed and torn carpet everywhere, torn drapes, and even a broken chandelier in the center of the room. There would be two sets of steps to the upper level of the home, and a hallway to the left and right of the entrance way. Moss was growing in a few places inside here as well, and the sconces on the walls held torches that had long since burned out. There were a few portraits on the wall, mostly destroyed like the rest of the home, though one showed a young elven woman with long, purple hair, most likely the healer that had once lived in this home. Though even that portrait looked like it was slowly getting weathered and destroyed by nature.

The moment Alicia took a few steps into the room, the front door would suddenly shut behind her. Perhaps it was just the wind, as she couldn't see anyone actually close the door, and looking around there appeared to be no one in the room. If there was a spirit here, it definitely wasn't planning on just jumping out in front of her. Had it not been for the large amount of moss and decay, the manor would've been actually quite beautiful, but as it stood, time had left it in a state of complete disrepair. Another observation one might make was that there seemed to be absolutely no animals wandering around. Normally one might expect rats, and other small rodents, or even just insects in an abandoned manor, yet it appeared that none had come into the home, the only life being the plants that had slowly grown their way into the manor. And the whole time, that feeling of being watched wouldn't leave Alicia... something was definitely looking at her somewhere.

 

[Pervy]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

Spoiler

"I think I heard a little voice whispering 'Go ahead' So I'm glad our fees are accepted, if we do not find valuables in this abode the bill will be sent to your next jof kin." Alicia informed, trying to open the front door.

She looked about in the main hall, pondering at the decrepit state. It'd be hard to find a body to conduct business with at this rate. She briefly took in the portrait.. examining it would help find the next of kin. "Well, seems we got a pretty good chance of a haunt, which is god, didn't mean I came for nothing. Time to find the customer." Alicia would unabatedly wander on, though as the feeling of being watched persisted she couldn't help but look left and right, and out and about for a few moments, before shrugging and continuing on, her sharp shovel relaxedly rested upon her shoulders. She would throughoutly search this mansion, beginning on the ground floor. She also tried to recall any tales about the house.. rarely were ghost stories so precise as to say 'and then she hung herself in the library, yes, the library, some say her body still hangs there, waiting for a handsome undertaker to deal with the matter!' But it could give a hint as to what to find here.. a healer... perhaps there was a laboratory or a kitchen with poisons to find? Poisons seemed like the poetic classic for tragic accidential or suicidal death... both good reasons to find a ghost at.

Seriously though, she didn't like incorporal undead, whilest she wasn't easily scared she had to admit to a certain sense of unease, as she explored on and ahead, down the corridor.. perhaps there was a basement?

 

[shotgungunshot]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

The spirit was tempted to actually shout 'go away' at the rather stubborn intruder, but it doubted she would listen to the ghost at this point. Alicia seemed determined to investigate her decrepit home, which meant she'd have to be dealt with.

Searching around the first floor would reveal that there was a kitchen directly to the left of the entrance hall. Just as with the rest of the house, most of the kitchen looked decrepit and run down. However, there would be quite a few large crates with different labels on them, some that read 'Vegetables' some that read 'Fruits' and others with similar food themed labels. Rather than everything else in the house, they seemed to be completely preserved, and a quick check inside would reveal food stuffs that looked remarkably fresh. Further examination would reveal a few small runes drawn on the sides of the crates, likely there to keep food from spoiling and preserve them from the harshness of nature. Other than that, the kitchen would yield nothing interesting, no poisons or medicines, just another room falling apart and left to rot. Though, as she moved to leave the room, Alicia would hear the cabinets start to open and close slowly, and stopping soon after, though a few would actually fall off the hinges and crash against the ground. If the simple warning wasn't enough to scare the woman off, then perhaps a few spooky happenings would convince her that this whole situation wasn't worth her time.

And the whole time she was still being watched, observed by whatever incorporeal force lived in the abandoned manor. She'd find, to the right of the entrance hall, that there was a set of stone steps that led underground, likely to that exact basement she had been looking for. Thankfully the stairs weren't wood, as they'd have likely become weak from the abandonment that plague the entire manor. The steps had some more moss growing over them, but otherwise they just led down into a very dark room. That room would bring Alicia what she was actually looking for, a sort of laboratory, which was a room that had been slightly more protected from the elements considering that it was mostly stone and built underground. It'd be very difficult to see, but thankfully there was a dim glow of a few strange plants in small planters scattered around the room. Over in the corner there'd be a table with all manner of glass tubes and tools for creating medicines, or poisons if one so desired. The instruments would have a thick layer of dust covering them, indicating they hadn't been touched in a long time, but otherwise they'd seem fine, as though if one wanted they could start it right back up again and use it now.

Scattered over the walls of the room were a few more runes, though they were more intended to focus magical energies rather than preserve anything. Of course, that would only be useful information if one knew a little bit about magical runes, otherwise they'd just look like magical symbols scrawled on the walls that could do pretty much anything. Though even with everything she could see, the one thing she was looking for was conspicuously absent, a body. Nothing even looking remotely like the remains of a body were in this room. "GET OUT!" The voice rang this time, no longer just a whisper in the wind, but instead a full blown shouting. The instruments on the table would shake a bit, and the sound would reverberate through the room... and yet still the ghost wouldn't show itself, preferring instead to shout and try to get Alicia to leave.

 

[Pervy]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

Spoiler

"Interesting, fresh fruits.. but no body hidden besides or under.. and now I smell like oranges.." Alicia wasn't afraid to dig into dangerous things, but she would not try eating any of those. She was on a mission! "Ah.. magic." she noted as she found one of the runes while looking on, chuckling. Those crates could propably sell for a good price.. but she wasn't an arcanery vendor.

"Huh.. oh.. listen, you are just ruining the inner decorations.. futher. Not scaring me. I've come to put you to rest, shouldn't fight that!" She gumbled something about inconvenient ghosts, then headed on.

She made sure to take a steady step whilest moving down the mossy stones, she could count the number of people she had buried due to falling down stairs badly. (four). "Knew it." She grinned. A healers laboratory. potentially a mad one! Here was were she'd find the body.

Igniting a fire would be some effort.. and endanger the houses integriy, so at first she tried to look around the place, more or less blindly, exploring the dusted tools. "Hmnnn.. -. yikes!" The shout startled, her, well it seeme this wasn't a very well mannered haunt. They rarey were... just once would she like a genleman haunt treat her like lady..

"Good afternoon to you too. Say, where's your body? Please tell me you're not one of those 'trapped in the wall' ones, cause that raises the fee by at least a gold-coin and I need to get my pickaxe.." She tried communicaions. "Oh, and to be clear, I'm not here to disturb your rest but to give it to you proper, so .. try and work with me?" She offered.

 

[shotgungunshot]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

The house's shaking seemed to calm down a little bit once Alicia explained what she was actually here for. It seemed that her words were at least heard, and things were silent for a few more moments before the spirit would speak again. This time the voice wouldn't be silently carried on the wind, or shouted, and instead it seemed to be mostly normal, with a slight spirit-y undertone. "Can't rest... Don't want to rest... And the body is far... far... away..." That... didn't sound right. Spirits were supposed to generally haunt around their body, not somewhere far away from it. Of course, the spirit could always be lying to try and get her to leave.

"Leave... I will be alone..." But she still wouldn't appear before Alicia, willing to at least speak with the woman that was disturbing her time in the home. "I have no money... No kin... you are wasting time..." Well... that also didn't sound true, as the manor clearly was an expensive place before it had started decaying, so there likely had to be something somewhere. "Please leave me..." Honestly, the voice sounded less powerful when it was on its own, without any accompanying haunted activity and without a strong force of echo.

As she spoke, however, the instruments over on the potion table would start moving ever so slightly, as though a weak ghost was trying to make a potion with what it had left. "You types always show up here... Wanting to get rid of me... I'm not harming anyone... Just wanna be alone." She had experience with a priest or two that also tried to make her leave, but this was HER home, and she didn't want to leave for any reason whatsoever.

As of now, either the spirit was lying to Alicia to try and get her to leave, or this whole haunt was extremely different from what should normally happen. Was the body really not in the manor? Was there nothing of interest here at all? The tools for potion making would continue slow movements, very gradually trying to make some sort of potion, but then one of the runes on the wall would glow, and the tools would all fall still, nothing moving them around anymore."Aww... It never works..."

 

[Pervy]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

Spoiler

"Deception and slander" The mortician explained. "Haunts naturally occure due to bad burying tactics, 9 out of 10 ghosts wouldn't be around if people properly kept their graves.. don't want to rest? Uh.. thats a new one though." She looked about, still in the darkened laboratoy.

"Well if you have no money or kin I'll do it for the good of my name, you see, us Gravenholmes have been having a sucessful funeral busines for years, until our own graveyard became haunted, and once a name is ruined.. either way, this place looks expensive enough. I am strictly against stealing, but recompensation.." She nodded, looking in the dark for valuable ingredients. .. some after all used gold or diamonds.

"Humnnn.. hold on." She noticed the rune glowing, in between the spooky potion making. "Whats this one. Did one of my predecesors put a limiting circle here or is that.." She approached the rune. it almost seemed like the rune one would use in an entrapping circle.. could that be it? "Well, I'm not quite paid for liberation buuut.." She pondered. It was close enough to her job, in a way. She'd try out what happened if she modified or removed the rune entirely, depending on the sturdyness of it.

 

[shotgungunshot]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

"Body is far away... Won't find it here... Don't want rest... Just want to be alone..." The spirit didn't seem to feel any further need to explain her desire not to rest, just leaving it at that. There was nothing more for her to say on that matter, sounding a little disappointed and sad, whether that was because of the failing potion attempt or not resting it would be hard to tell.

"You are thief... Didn't ask for your services... So will not give you compensation..." Looking around, the more expensive potion ingredients that Alicia would know of wouldn't be there. Either they were kept somewhere else or there just weren't any diamonds or gold around the house. Only the cheaper ingredients would be sitting around the room, things that were worth so little they would likely not even be worth the time collecting and selling them. "Leave... no money to be found here..." Though she was kind of curious about why she would risk a haunted manor just for the sake of her family name.

"Don't know... runes been there for years..." The one that Alicia focused on would be easily removed and disturbed, which would cause a pair of see through, ghostly hands to appear over by the table. Those hands would start doing what they had been before, moving quite faster now, mixing ingredients together and corking the bottle that the resulting potion was in. "Haven't done that in years... Tried so many times..." If the mortician listened very closely, it actually sounded as though the spirit were crying as she talked, doing something so familiar to her after such a very long time. The other runes wouldn't react in anyway, and the spiritual hands would fade back to invisibility, but now a potion was just sitting on the table. "How did you do that...?"

 

[Pervy]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

Spoiler

"I'd love to leave you be alone but a mansion is a bad place for that. A grave would be a great place, sooo you should help me out here, ghosty." She reasoned. .. then exhaled.

"Geesh, talk about a moodkiller. I mean, it's ok, used to sad cliens, but the vengeful ghosts are a lot more fun, one flung its own head at me, that .. was exciting, in a messed up way." She explained.

"I am -not- a thief. I provide a service that, due to your undeath, you have no say in the matter. Would you rather be in a mass grave or in a nice, comfy grave, with a well made gravestone? I'd show you a collection of our gravestones, but someome seems to be shy. I'm an undertaker with standards and I got a lot of satisfied customers, trust me, I asked some. ... that and admittedly not being eaten by that one ravenous ghoul whilest all others war I deem in part due to his grave having a sturdy Gravenholme funeral cross no.3, much appreciated model." She nodded.

"Huh. whats that.. let me give you a.. hah. hand." She enthused, always had been humourus, for a gravekeeper, to the displeasure of her grandfather.

"What kind of potion did you mix?" She asked first, then looked about for more runes. "Well, it feels as if someone really had it out for you. Most people are content with the killing of their enemies, and usually, that death is enough satisfaction buuut.. some assholes like to trap their defeated in a state of undeath for their own ego, and some really, really messed up people torture not the dead but the living, though if I'm right you could have even long forgotten why and for what. I'm not an expert in magic, but the rune over there, which I just scraped out, looks like something you'd put in a restrictive circle, which means a)It bounds you from the one thing a ghost wants to do.. what they did in life, b)explains how you can be here without remains and C) means theres other runes of its kind. I will remove them but this is definitly a complicated job, we are talking 30 silver and upwards, just so you know." She would have done it for free out of empathy anyway, the ghost hadn't sound evil at all, just a bit whiney. and there was a lack of things thrown in her direction as well.. but why not make business -and- do nice things? That was the teachings of her family from long ago, heck, it was the founding principle of Alice Mayan, one daughter of whom had founded the Gravenholme family, with Alexander von Gravenholme, who, rumours had it, was a vampire who discarded his station, noble title, and used magic to supress some of his.. nastier urges.

Alicia herself gave little credance to such theories, though she die have a strong liking for red wine and a slight resistance against the doings of the undead, which she attributed to her work.

 

[shotgungunshot]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

"I like this place... It's my home..." She didn't want to be in a grave, those were small, her home was nice and spacious, which was part of the reason she didn't want to leave.

"You'd be sad too... If you couldn't do anything... I like being here... but I can't do anything I like." The long stretches of boredom where she tried to do her favorite things only to be stumped had made her very sad over the years. Part of her had wondered why she had ever kept trying, but it was probably from desperation, left with nothing else to do she just would give those things a try every now and then.

"I'd prefer to be in a manor that I've lived in my whole life and is familiar to me! You're not listening to me!" She dropped the slow speech for a moment, trying to get it through to Alicia that she was perfectly fine where she was... aside from the whole 'can't enjoy anything that she used to enjoy in life' thing. "If it weren't for being unable to do what I like, I'd be perfectly happy and content in here!" Well, at least the spirit was no longer sobbing, though now she sounded angry... well... more annoyed and exasperated than anything.

When Alicia made the little joke about giving a hand, she'd hear something rolling down the steps... Looking over, it was just a tomato, and judging by its freshness it probably came from one of those crates she had found in the kitchen. "Guess I can't throw things still..."

"I made a minor healing potion!" The spirit actually sounded proud with that, the potion shaking a bit before going still on the table. "If you've got any minor cuts or bruises then you can take it if you'd like. I just wanted to finally make one." There was a stretch of silence after Alicia explained the whole deal with the runes that were carved into the room, along with her theories on what kind of people would do that. "Wish I could help... But I really don't remember anything about them... It's been a long time, so... not much I know. I just see them around a lot when I try to do things, but otherwise I couldn't tell you anything..." Well, actually, that was a lie, she did know about those runes and even who had put them there, she just really didn't feel like talking about it. "I already said I couldn't pay you. Increasing the price doesn't change anything when I've got nothing..." Well, at least Alicia had succeeded in making the ghost talkative, which she might come to regret at some point, but for now it meant she could get some sort of information, however helpful it may be. There are loads of them hidden all over the place too... Of the ones I know... I think you passed by at least two dozen... That's not counting the food crate ones though... those are just to keep food fresh. Help yourself if you get hungry." And if Alicia ever took the time to check the food in the crates again, there'd be nothing noticeably wrong with the food, just that they were all fresh and there wasn't any meat.

Now that the ghost's guard was down, and she had gotten to do something she had greatly enjoyed, it seemed she was far more hospitable than initial impressions would have suggested. "Then you can remove as many runes as you want and leave me, right? I admit, I'm already happy that I can make potions again..." And those hands would appear again, repeating the exact same process as last time with the same ingredients to create another minor healing potion.

 

[Pervy]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

Spoiler

"Was your home when you were alife. For one, now you aren't, for two.. this place is a dump." She informed. "You need to find peace, not cling to this mansion." Alicia sighed. if she had to take down the entire mansion to find peace for the ghost that might be more effort than she was willing to go through... but her honor demanded it.

"Hah. missed me though." The grave-digger couldn't help but grin a bit at the tomatoe tossing. "You don't stand a ghost of a chance at hitting me!" She went on, a bit unprofessionally, she had to admit, but it helped her counteract the morbity of the situation.
She picked up the potion, informing. "Not enough to pay me but I might knock it down a silver or two, perhaps you can make more.." She opened and eyed the potion suspsiciously. It might as well be poison. EVEN if the ghost was not ill intended... ingredients spoil and minds get warped by undead.

"Hrmnn.. well then.. only answer is.. try to do things. What do you normally do? To bury you proper we need to deactivate these runes it seems. Ugh.. two dozen? Thats a lot of effort just for a ghost, perhaps they were just ward-runes initially and ended up trapping you.. is there a central control to disable them all perhaps?" She pondered. she was also not sure if turning out all those runes would be a good idea... perhaps she'd leave the last few going, just in case the ghost always wanted to vivisect someone as well.

"Tell you what, you make me a bunch of potions and I'll consider the bill paid, help you with those runes. But I still ought to inhume you. Its my job. Don't you want to rest after all these years?" She said, prepared to seek out and disable the next rune if the ghost was game. A healer-ghost? Unusual for those people to have the tragic death or fate that created ghosts, Alicia mused.

 

[shotgungunshot]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

"Yeah but... I still live here... Well, not live, but I reside here. It's my home, always has been, I built it myself... And I know it's falling apart, but... I don't NEED to keep anything repaired because I don't actually have a need of any of it. If the stairs collapse I can just float up and stuff like that." If Alicia tried to actually break the mansion, she'd be surprised just how sturdy it was despite all the disrepair. Perhaps it was enchanted to stay standing, or maybe the spirit had just built it really tough in her life.

Another tomato would tumble down the stairs at the 'ghost of a chance' joke... landing at the foot of the stairs next to the last one. "I would be surprised if it had hit you in the first place. Moving them all the way from the kitchen is hard." Checking the potion, it smelled like an average healing potion, and looked completely normal. Seems it was as the ghost had said, a potion that could help heal minor wounds. "I can make loads more... If that's what you want then I'd be happy to make any if I have the ingredients." She was an incredibly skilled potion brewer, that's how she had got her reputation as a healer. Sure she didn't know a lick of healing magic, but her potions usually fixed the problems the people of the village had. Unfortunately, after her passing she had never been able to make another one, the rune always stopping her before she got close.

"I try to do all sorts of things, but most of it doesn't really work. two dozen that you passed on the way here... Err... there's also most of the second floor. There's no central control I'm aware of... though to be fair I only notice them when I try to do something and they end up glowing. If the runes are too much work for you, you can leave after just getting a few done, I'll be happy being able to do just a few things." There might have been somewhere, but she had never seen it, nor had she ever been informed of whether there was a central one or not. "Oooh... I know... Let's go get the one that stops me from gardening! That way I can make you way better potions and stuff that you'd find even more value in. I'm lucky it rains enough to keep the plants watered... but if I could garden then I'd be able to make you some great stuff! The materials are cheap, but if you go through the long process of making them into certain potions, you could make a lot of money." She offered happily, more willing to pay for being able to finally have fun again rather than paying to have to leave.

"I really don't want to rest, I promise. I try to find the positives in life... and well, after going through the positives of being a spirit, I've decided it's actually not so bad once I got used to it. And with those runes gone, I think my life... err... non-life... can be just as enjoyable." That... that was an extremely rare thing to ever hear about... a ghost that just kind of wanted to stay? She didn't seem to have harmful intentions, she lived out in the middle of nowhere, what was the harm in allowing her to continue just sort of being there?

 

[Pervy]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

Spoiler

"Right, and if the ceiling collapses, you wont be hit, and if it all turns to dust, you'll just float about here, and become a wicked spirit chasing anyone that tries to travel through the spot where your house once stood. Your life has passed, find peace and let me do my job." she argued.

"You're wasting good tomatoes. I have great reflexes." She informed. "Though the distance-throw trick is interesting. You seem to be an advanced ghost who got their powers restricted to nothingness, peculiar." She shrugged. "But now my job. Once the runes are removed I have ways to MAKE you come to rest, even without your remains." She nodded.

"You misunderstand. I don't do this to make people healthy. I don't do this to get rich. I'll keep what I need, sell the rest to equal the fee, then work my job. I have pride in my job. I'd rather bury a billionaire than become one, given a chance. But.. sure, lets help with your gardening. Then I will check out the second floor.. I hope what you said earlier about the stairs was just hyperbole..?" She asked, cautiously.

"Theres no positives to find in life, your life is over." She explained, back on the stairs. "Life has to end, so new life can begin.. and if no life ends, well that ruins my business! Imagine you were a customer of the Gravenholme funeral .. it'd be emberassing. I grant you, you seem more easy maintenance than most, but still... You are strange. I have to think this through, go do your garden.. things." She nodded, and would proceed to erase whatever rune got in the way there, sure, she could make an undying potion production.. though she suspected there was more to this ghost, but she didn't -want- to use the poor thing as eternal potion machine. She wanted to let her find peace, and didn't quite believe someone could find peace in unlife. It kind of spoke against her families principles. "You didn't seem overly cheerful with your whole 'go away' angle." Plus, she couldn't be sure the ghosts attitude wouldn't change after a few of the runes were lifted.. she felt like one had already changed how the ghostly figure acted with others about.

 

[shotgungunshot]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

"Yeah, but if I become a wicked spirit then you can just deal with me THEN can't you? Besides, this place isn't gonna collapse or anything, I'm sure of that." The spirit wasn't going to just let this argument go, she felt pretty fine the way things were, and she didn't want to move on to something different when she was in a spot that she could accept. Plus, if she was allowed to even do the things that she loved once the runes were gone, then really she'd be actually happy with the whole 'being a ghost' thing.

"I don't have to eat... So really I'm not wasting anything, unless you plan on staying here for a while then no one around actually eats any food here. Good luck on getting rid of all these runes, there are A LOT. And that's only counting the ones I know about." She shrugged... and then remembered that she couldn't be seen so the shrug didn't really have any sort of effect like she had wanted. "But... But WHY do I have to rest? I'm fine, no one is getting harmed, I could even be of great help to the people of the village if I can make my healing potions again..."

"Oh yeah, the stairs aren't actually going to collapse under you. They're just as sturdy as the stone ones you used to get down here actually." Well, now she didn't know how she would ever persuade Alicia to let her remain where she was in life... but maybe she'd think of something once she was allowed to garden again. Might as well get help removing those runes, because if she could convince the woman to leave her be she'd want a few of them gone so she can do some stuff. "I can understand pride in your job... I was always prideful about being a good healer. But... I dunno... I feel like you're following the letter of your job rather than the spirit of it."

"That's just semantics. I find happiness and positives in my unlife, just as I did in life. And besides, the only reason new life HAS to begin is BECAUSE old life ends. If old life never ended then there would be no reason to need new life. I am an old life that doesn't have to end, so there's no reason to need to replace me." The garden would be out back behind the manor, where dozens of exotic looking flowers grew, looking a little withered but not unsalvageable if they were cared for properly. Once a watering can started to float towards the plants, a rune would glow on the back porch and the can would fall to the ground. If Alicia removed the rune, the can would float again, this time moving to carefully water each flower, visible hands holding it steadily. "Here you go little guys... I can finally take care of you proper." Then a few seeds would be lifted and planted into the dirt, the watering can moving to get those as well. As she worked and gardened, she'd respond to what the mortician had to say. "I thought you were one of the 'brave' teenagers that came around to try and mess up my home. They sometimes come to smash windows and stuff, so I do that to scare them off... Or you could've been trying to actually harm me. There are some spells that could actually inflict a lot of pain to me... an old friend of mine once told me there were even spells that could essentially 'torture' spirits. So I was scared you were here to do that and tried to chase you off. Sorry about all that." She said earnestly as she planted the last new flower seed and slightly trimmed the weeds that were starting to grow into the garden.

Once that was all said and done, she'd wait to see what Alicia had to say, or what she did, next. The spirit expected she'd be checking out the upstairs as well, in which case she'd follow her along there, willing to chat the whole way if she so wished.

 

[Pervy]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

Spoiler

"In .. theory, yes. Then again, with the runes supressing you, how do I know you aren't a wicked spirit already?" She added. Perhaps it was a mistake to remove more, but.. so far the ghost seemed happy.. even helpful, considering the potion argument.. "But.. thats not how things go.. I mean.. I could build a huge-ass coffin over the house and.. no no, anyone going in or out would still be a grave robber..

Why's no one respect my work-ethics." She sulked, and pondered. "Heh. The spirit. Do I get to throw a tomatoe at you now, futile as it'd be? You have no clue what pain it is to be a mortician if the dead refuse to remain dead." She nodded.. rarely did she get to discuss these issues.. with a client.

"Who are you to decide your life shouldn't end. perhaps someone isn't getting born because you occupy the.. soul-space." She nodded, looking over the exotic, if overgrown garden curiously. Still, for now, she played along, approaching the rune on the porch. It was weird though, a bunch of runes that just.. stopped a ghost from doing what she wanted to do? Why? Really to torture someone? That was some vindictive magic for someone that was 'just' a harmless healer.

"Oh trust me, I do know the basics of these spells, they are called things like 'Chastize spirits' but no need to do that to you... I think. Tell me about that friend and.. no offense, but,.. gardening is kind of against my work ethic, I like for things that I put into the ground.. to stay there, so I'll let you do your thing, check out the second floor, maybe if you can put healing potions infront of the house I could tell the citizens I soothed your spirit and all they need to do is order coffins at the Graveholmes to keep sure I keep you soothed.." She grinned.. it was a bit dangerous, making a way for herself as witch, but as funeral director, people feared and respected her either way... and she had a bit of an oportunistic streak..."Anyway, you seem done with the basics, lets go upstairs." She nodded, and did so, returning inside the house with the odd ghost.

 

[shotgungunshot]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

"I mean... I guess I could be a wicked spirit, but really I don't think I'd be so willing to talk if I just wanted to chase you away. This is how I remember being in life anyway. But if I am then you'd see it once the runes are gone, and just deal with me then." The spirit reasoned, figuring that if she really was evil she'd be stopped rather quickly anyway. "I mean, it's not how things go in OTHER cases... I think you can agree that this case is kind of different from the usual ones."

"I respect your work ethic! I just think it's being put in the wrong place right now." The ghost assured, trying to cheer up Alicia when she seemed to sulk a little bit. Then she giggled at the idea of having a tomato thrown at her for making a bit of a bad pun. "I guess it's only fair. If you want there are a bunch in the kitchen for you to throw." She genuinely offered... before remembering that the mortician might have some issues finding WHERE to throw those tomatoes. "But I'm only one dead that doesn't wanna remain dead... And I'm not causing trouble..."

"That argument assumes that I'm preventing a soul that is better than mine from entering the world. But there is just as likely a chance I'm keeping an even more evil future dictator from being born. Besides, thousands die and are born every day. Is it evil for me to save a life considering that it might prevent someone from being born? Are healers just as evil as the undead?" She argued, cheerily gardening for the first time in years, actually adding life to the world in a way, at least if you counted the flowers she grew as lives.

"Who are you to decide when my life SHOULD end... shouldn't that be my choice?" Though she stopped talking when Alicia thought up how she could sort of exploit her powers to make some more business, seeming a little put off by that. "I appreciate your business sense... But I don't know... I normally offer my healing services for free." Either way, she'd follow along up the stairs to the second floor. The second floor would have the same allignment of a hallway to the left and one to the right. "Let's go... that way!" There'd be a moment of silence as the ghost realized that Alicia wouldn't see where she was actually pointing...

"I... err... meant the left hallway..." The first room they'd find is a small reading room, with a few runes written on the walls and bookshelves. But the one she wanted most to be gone was a different one. "Could you... um... remove the rune on that drawer... over there?" And if she did the ghost would eagerly open the drawer and pull out... drawings? And not just any drawings, they were drawings of nude women... with... oh my... cocks between their legs. They all were posed lewdly, and the ghost would lift those pictures up, flipping through them to see if they were all there. "You have no idea how much I've wanted to look through all these... Mmmmm... Couldn't even enjoy myself..." Did... did ghosts even do THAT?

 

[Pervy]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

Spoiler

"A lot of dead are restless.. but even if I could throw a tomatoe well, you are invisible and insubstantial, you know. The only reason I'm not creeped out is experience." That and she wouldn't imagine a voice quite like this for sure. "It's unnatural, and we are still on the fence about you being a good soul. What else did you do but heal people?" She inquired.. "You sound a bit too good to be true."

Then she removed another rune and.. "...

Wait did I just help you find your porn-stash.. but.. how would you.. how do ghosts even.. why do all the women have dicks.. whats.. " For the first time, she was a little clueless and 'scared' "I err.. really don't know how to deal with this, you shouldn't.. I mean.. you should.. uuhmnn..." She scratched the back of her head, pondering simply leaving now, taking a healing potion and calling it a premature burial...this was definitly an unusually lively ghost and she kind of didn't want to ruin the spirits newfound happiness without need either.

 

[shotgungunshot]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

"I mean... If I wanted I can become corporeal for a short while. If you wanna throw a tomato, I'd be willing to allow it." The spirit explained cheerily, having been put in a much better mood now that she could do all sorts of things that actually made her happy. "In life, I liked to heal people more than anything else that I could do, in any way that I could. I also liked to garden, cook, have company over, read, write, and even paint sometimes. Other than that... there's not much I can think of immediately." Well, the answer was mostly honest, aside from the fact that a good few details were left out in certain areas. But that was her life as far as she could remember, rather peaceful despite the very thorough placing of limiting runes left all over her manor.

"I mean... If I could've found these pictures on my own, I'd never ask for help getting them... And yes... they're all far more endowed than a normal women... mostly because that's what I like, and they're more similar to me than regular women!" As the spirit flipped through the pictures... it felt as though the atmosphere around the entire manor changed, warmer than it had felt before. Alicia would feel as though she were being watched closely again, rather than just being accompanied. She could hear... slightly increased breathing? Ghosts didn't breathe... at least they weren't supposed to. In reality, because the spirit was aroused, she naturally started breathing heavier, not out of need but out of habit when aroused. It was almost as though the house itself was somehow aroused... and this change would grow a little more pronounced with each picture that the ghost flipped through.

"Mmm... I shouldn't what? I'm just enjoying myself a little... I've been pent up for years..." The room would shake a little, less like the angry shaking from earlier and more like a... a quivering? And if Alicia observed, the walls would look a little wet all of a sudden, not soaked through, but there were little trails of moisture moving down the wall slowly as the spirit read. "Ok... guess I'll come clean about something. I also used to masturbate A LOT as well when I was alive..." She admitted, and those spiritual hands would appear again, this time around hip level, and they began gripping something that would remain invisible... but judging by the way the hands gripped and moved, it was definitely something long and thick and likely very phallic. The door to the room would also shut, and if Alicia tried it she'd find that it was locked.

 

[Pervy]

Re: Doubtful Ice Cream (Pervy/Shotgungunshot)

Spoiler

"You.. want to get tomatoe'd? hmmk..." She pondered. "... no need though. Well, you seem oddly nice for one of the udnead, perhaps I can make.. an exeption, still those runes bother me." Alicia looked around in the mannor.. she had known enough of things to not be too confused and knew the term 'morphic resonance'

"Right, so you make healing potions and read porn.. not the usual clientel for sure. Errr.." She approached a wall, half curiously, half cautiously poking it "R.. right a nymphomanic ghost. uh.. heyh!" She complained, as soon as she noticed the shut door, growing a little alarmed. "Alright, I think thats enough fo that you horny-ghost.. thingie.." She informed, watchign the hands lewd gesture, pulling out her shovel. What a strange scenario she had gotten herself into.. but she was not about to let herself become.. victim.. to a ghosts lusts.