Things you're going to hell for.

[Nunu]

Re: Things you're going to hell for.

It also bothers me that other veterans don't seem to feel this way, at least not the ones I've talked to. They act more like I'm a freak or a psycho because I don't feel bad. Of course it could be a weird sort of jealousy I guess because they don't want to be bothered by it anymore. I feel a little better having said something to someone not a veteran though.

kind of related:

i once met a man on a train who i got to talking with. apparently he used to be a thief and had been in and out of jail (not to mention peoples houses) for a while before becoming a consultant on how to stop your house getting burgled. anyway he told me that at times he had to steal bread to keep himself alive, to which there is the obvious reaction of "well if you didn't have any other option i guess its okay".

He then told me that that is the kind of thinking that helps stop thieves from rehabilitating, because what they did was okay.

doing something bad for the best of reasons doesn't mean you did something good. you still did something bad, its up to you to come to terms with that and to try and avoid situations where you have to do that again.

anyway... i doubt that helped but if it did i'm glad.

 

[RaimeiNaginata]

Re: Things you're going to hell for.

It also bothers me that other veterans don't seem to feel this way, at least not the ones I've talked to. They act more like I'm a freak or a psycho because I don't feel bad. Of course it could be a weird sort of jealousy I guess because they don't want to be bothered by it anymore. I feel a little better having said something to someone not a veteran though.

Well, then again, they may feel that way because they might have never been personally responsible for the death of a civilian (I'm assuming he wasn't some junior terrorist here), much less a little kid. It's probably a lot easier for them to look at you as a freak than to try and imagine how they might feel in your shoes.

I don't think it's strange at all to not care about it. Perhaps it means that on some level, you've accepted it and have decided to move on.

Of course, if I were you, I wouldn't take anything I say totally seriously. I'm no psychologist, and I've never had to fight for my life before, so I don't know. This is just my take on it all.