Cappy Sues Toxicshock

[Cappy]

The alleged "Non-Fapper" has been called to court for, *Picks up official looking papers*, "Not masturbating, at a hentai site, on three charges." *Puts the papers down with both hands, looking to the jury all serious looking*, This, gentlemen, and ladies, of the Jury, is a heinous crime, a heinous heinous crime.
Now, Chibi might get away with it, but she's female, and scares the Fla-beezus out of me, Toxicshock, does not.

I call him out to court on this fine day, as I had warned yesterday, he had the right to an attorney, he has the right to defend himself, but he must show.

I issue a summons. Also, if somebody would be kind enough to judge over the session, preferably a neutrally aligned one, we don't want any chaotic evils siding with me, or any neutral goods to be siding with Toxic, we want pure neutral. Well, I do, dunno why I said we.

 

[Sponge]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

OH OH! PICK ME! *cough* I mean... I'll do it. I'm totally neutral, and brand new here, so I have not much time getting to know the participants of this forum.

While new, I am still educated and reasonable enough to make logical choices and reasoning.

 

[Cappy]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

OH OH! PICK ME! *cough* I mean... I'll do it. I'm totally neutral, and brand new here, so I have not much time getting to know the participants of this forum.

While new, I am still educated and reasonable enough to make logical choices and reasoning.

Alright, first question, to truly be neutral on this forum you have to be like majority of us.
ARE
YOU
A
PERVERT?!

Answer carefully.

 

[Mamono Assault Force]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

Is the court aware, that toxic does not masturbate due to the fact that I do it for him?

 

[Cappy]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

Is the court aware, that toxic does not masturbate due to the fact that I do it for him?

Despite how much you may love and care for him, you cannot be there for each time he is in need of masturbation, lest he has erectile dysfunction, or an unusually low sexual drive. And no RaptorJesus, being omni-present does not count as being there.

Movement to dismiss court denied, till a judge is employed to make neutral decisions.

 

[Sponge]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

Yes I'm a pervert... don't like it though.

 

[Cappy]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

Yes I'm a pervert... don't like it though.

Hmm, close call, but I grant my admission of you standing for judge, now all that is needed is for Toxic to do the same and we may begin.

 

[Sponge]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

I'll send a court summons.

 

[ToxicShock]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

or an unusually low sexual drive.

I have a note from my doctor [/thread]

 

[Cappy]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

I have a note from my doctor [/thread]

Then you are immediatly pronounced guilty for having a low sexual drive,
Which is unacceptable in its entirety, you sir, have no e-penis.

 

[ToxicShock]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

That wasn't one of the charges, I demand such ludicrous sentences be dropped. And yes, I have no e-penis, that's why I don't get into forum measuring contests.

 

[Cappy]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

Do you wish me to bring up another thread? It would have the same title of this one, I make a plead to the court to change the charges made against Mr. Shock, and make them third degree Lack of E-Peen, and second degree Low Sexual Drive followed by the final charge of not really being perverted enough.

 

[TheWeirdOne]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

While we're spamming the forums, I gotta say that comic in your sig is made of epic win, especially since it's coming from you Cappy.

 

[Cappy]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

While we're spamming the forums, I gotta say that comic in your sig is made of epic win, especially since it's coming from you Cappy.

Lol, thanks, off subject, but thanks, I found it literally a couple of minutes ago, and I was like, "HOLY SHIT MUST HAVE" and then I put it in my sig :3

 

[ToxicShock]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

Well the problem with that is I make no argument to the fact I have no sex drive.

If you want me to humor you, I can argue what is considered "perverted enough" but in the end you're still technically winning this case

 

[Cappy]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

but in the end you're still technically winning this case

I came.

 

[ToxicShock]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

HAHA! What the hell are you talking about, that's not even an argument at that point. You win at something I'm agreeing with you on? It's a fact that no one's debating.

It's like going through a 3rd grade math book and getting excited every time you know one of the answers.

 

[Mamono Assault Force]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

It's like going through a 3rd grade math book and getting excited every time you know one of the answers.

Actually...

 

[ToxicShock]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

You're supposed to be behind me at any given point

 

[Kusanagi]

Re: Cappy Sues Toxicshock

Mentally or physically?


Anyways.

I object to these charges being brought against Toxic. If you're going to sue him for differences that he was born with, then I suggest you also go sue the crippled, mentally challenged, all the ugly people, and any other people I'm missing.

Suing someone for something they cannot/have no desire to change is pointless, and unless you can prove beyond a doubt that he's a detriment to our society as a whole - which I would argue against, as he is a great psychiatrist and I have never seen nor heard of him harming another member who did not deserve it - then this trial is a farce.