triodon
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| Long ago in a distant land, I, Ren'pU, the shape shifting master of weebin', unleashed an unspeakable vein! But a foolish blue-collar forumer wielding a sense-of-taste stepped forth to oppose me. Before the final argument was struck, I called mods to open a blacklist untill the future, and they flung hick on reddit where my evil is law. Now the fool seeks to return to the past and undo the market that is Ren'py! |
There comes a moment in every man's life when he realises that Ren'Py games are shit. Life is pain, I know, but by the moment you understand it, you will be grateful you're NOT one of the billions of hamsters who play porn instead of watching it. And okay Ren'Py, it's just a big word (only in this case), but I'm talking about things a bit higher than that. I'm talking about an IDEA: porn-clickers, porn-flash-games, online porn-games (they're not the same), visual novels and other games that are porn, but not games. I'm not saying that porn is bad or something - it just exist and it's a given, what I'm talking about are the games. When you understand how things are, you will realise that these games are shit as porn, because the effort to make a porn was clearly spent to make a game, and as games these games are shit, because the effort to make a game was clearly spent to make a porn. After that you'll have a chase and where they'll lead not even God knows.
And now you're here. Whether you've come a long way or not, I'm happy to tell you know that you're in the top 10% who dared to click on that link (much less read to this point). I don't know if you have experience in these lands or not, because the only thing I know for real: you're a man who come for something more, and I'm happy to tell it's all here.
I made a little-tricky tier list - a storehouse of knowledge accumulated through years of practice. There will be NO useless wrappers with beautiful graphics and zero gameplay, fecal dumps and other fuck - only the best of the best, games you MUST play and when you play it, you WILL LOVE them. . . . and B category (we don't talk about it).
There's only 3 categories:
| S - Masterwork | The legend, the classic - the best representatives of ALL porn games. You will NOT find the better ones. |
| A - Great | Excellent games with good graphics, gameplay and fap material. The only thing that separates them from the masterwork is the ordinariness or the duration (maybe both). |
| B - Fine | Good games with some good and some fine aspects, but with the necessary abyss in the others. While the games aren't bad at all, but I stuck them in here more out of pity. |
| S |
|---|
Teraurge | You were just sleeping in your bed before the light came and dragged you in. Now, you find yourself in an unfamiliar place full of bizarre alien creatures of all different types. Turns out that an experimenting witch accidentally dragged you through a dimensional portal. The bad news: she doesn't know how to send you back. |
Forest of the Blue Skin | The ageless classic, a revolution in the genre and the toughest argument that porn games can be more than just click-to-fap. Good metroidvania and adventure-platformer, that different from normal ones just by the fact that is driven by a desire of the other thing what ends at the end of the neck. |
Degrees of Lewdity | London if it was real. . . and no, I'm not talking about SCP. There's not much story or challenges, as well as limits. That's right, this game gives you some instruments and events, but it's up to YOU to entertain yourself. It's about survival, not physical but moral. |
My Dystopian Robot Girlfriend | Game about bad porn, good story, robotic robots and gags. You can say I'm a liar because I said there's no "VN crap" here and this game is "VN crap", but I will say that you're a fool because it' not crap. It's game very about story, digging into events, dialogues between the characters and, most importantly, you and her. |
Princess & Conquest | "100's hours RPG" - when someone says something like that, I picture Witcher and this game. It's well made, written, good to play and HUGE. It's a big game, a REALLY big one, and If you have a soul to sell and life to burn - this's a good option to do it. |
| A |
|---|
Eroico | FOBS if it was linear. I'm not a big fan of these phrases, but when the creator talks openly and closely about his love to blue skin' , I can't say a shit about it. It's a very, VERY beautiful game, with good platforming and action, taking into account the best traits from FOBS. The only thing that will tear your soul apart - there's only 3 levels, and they're short. |
The Fairy Tale of Holy Knight Ricca: Two Winged Sisters | The one and the only problem with 3D porn games (not to mention the fact they're all made on Ren'py) - their authors think that taking care in 3D will relieve them of the responsibility of making a game. It wouldn't sound SO bad if there wasn't exist one little kickstart of around 1.6 millions euros, the main goal of which was to make not an awful game, but a bad one. Everything would be back on track if a little japanese didn't make an ACTUALLY good 3D game, spending on it 4 years of his life. . . and uncountable count of stained women's panties. |
Drain Mansion | FOBS if it was horror. I wouldn't say Eroico's gag again, but one that calls succubus. This game about succubus, incestus and funnus trippus in their mansionus. It's NOT about graphics or animations, but pretty interesting levels, puzzles and gameplay that's satisfying. |
Monsters Black Market | FINALLY a management game. I don't know what's happened to the management genre here, but for some reason it's the only game that makes sense to consider at all. Apart from the difficulty (which isn't there), it's a really good game to play 'n build. After first playtrough, I INSIST on downloading the complex breeding mod, because otherwise you will die of boredom trying to play it again. |
Monsters'n Girls & Super Monsters'n Girls | The most underrated game on this tier list. . . and I don't know why! It's a mix of old-school spirit and new bounty trends (there's even sex), but there's still less excitement than before an another Ren'py fuck. Well, that's true of most games, but at least there's gameplay. |
Night of Revenge | Local-local market dark souls. Some people think it's not dark souls, but bloodborne and it's a pity I don't care. It's a 2D action-platformer with a souls-like style, and there's not much else to say about. It's a great gallery, but a weak game. |
Alien Quest | Good metroidvania with Alien in the main crew. It sags at the end, but is generally pretty good, though pretty generic and short. |
Fuck Nights at Fredrika's | When FNAF fans have grow up. Shitpost that turned out in the independent game and if you've ever heard of FNAF (the original one), this game will pleasantly surprise your purple guy. |
| B |
|---|
SiNiSistar & SiNiSistar 2 | NOR, but short. There are more maids and less souls, but who said it was a good idea? Like the big sister, it's a great gallery, but not a game. |
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| I never understood anime memes before, and when I finished the game I. . . only reinforced that. |
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| Quite interesting one. It feels like a mix something between arcade machines, phone games and some japanese bullshit, but it plays surprisingly well despite the way your eye deftly picks off talked-out bitches. I HIGHLY recommend to play this game - it's pretty underrated. |
Roun' Roun' Molester Train | It's not one of those "games with a soul" or "try not cum" creep, it's just a good engine. Engine with a good behavior and the only regret - it brokes after several hours of work. |
The Company | IT'S NOT HTLM IT'S NOT HTML IT'S NOT HTML IT'S NOT HTML IT'S NOT HTML IT'S NOT HTML IT'S NOT HTML IT'S NOT HTML IT'S NOT HTML IT'S NOT HTML IT'S NOT HTML IT'S NOT HTML IT'S NOT HTML IT'S NOT HTML IT'S NOT HTML |
Kincaid | I'M NOT FURRY I'M NOT FURRY I'M NOT FURRY I'M NOT FURRY I'M NOT FURRY I'M NOT FURRY I'M NOT FURRY I'M NOT FURRY I'M NOT FURRY I'M NOT FURRY I'M NOT FURRY I'M NOT FURRY I'M NOT FURRY I'M NOT FURRY I'M NOT FURRY |
Cloud Meadow | AAA-managment game with a big money bag and the best pixel-art on the market, but one of the worst realisation of potential. At least there are good dragons. |
Trials in Tainted Space | Game with the best abbreviation, worst characters and the longest playtrough. The only game here I couldn't make through and proud of it. |
JSK | Olds will cry, youngs will joy. A bunch of specific games about muscular men, concerned girls. . . and vice versa. |
NTR Legend & Ntragollic | Pretty simple, but well-made . Fap material with a
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(no jokes). |
Price For Freedom: Avarice | I had a rather painful meeting with this one. I see how much work has gone into it and ideas has been developed, but it's a shame to see how boring it's to play. There are volumes of necessary and not-so-necessary text that will crush you if you don't understand it and one-click-tactic-gameplay without much, you know, action. Saving the case good story and characters, but still. . . I still waiting for 7 fucking years when they make new scenes for Iski! Untill they're done with making new bullshit characters (that I haven't seen but I certain there's bad) and start fixing the game, there will never be a higher B road. |
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| Simple beat 'em up with a big orc and little not orcs that must be orked over. |
Succubus Temptation | A game with HUGE potential but modest realisation. Honestly, this game could have been something like Eroico, but with more of a combat bias rather than platforming. But either because the author got lazy, or because of the fear of wasting more money - it turned out to be Eroico, but without gameplay. Very pleasing in the beginning, but at the end let go because of unfinished realisation. |
Well, all good things come to an end. . . including this tier list. Honestly, unlike other tier lists (a piece of shit, more like), I'm NOT planning on supporting it. Maybe I will make some minor changes, fixes but that's it. One way or another, I've played enough good, bad and magnificent games and I GUARANTEE that you WILL NOT find anything great or especially masterwork, other than what's on this tier list. In the future, there might be some of this stuff coming out, but don't get your hopes up. The only thing left on my mind is those millions of "try to not cum" porn-games (of which God forbid a dozen were good), but it's a little different and they also need their own space. Maybe someday I'll create something about them, maybe not.
Anyway, thanks for reading, rating and playing (especially for those who made it to the end). Leave feedback if you can and can't, and that's it. Now my burden is lifted and I can say goodbye:
Cya
| This post is a copy of my post from F95. You can go over and support it there as well. |
| CEST 17:17, 10.05.2024 | Initial release |
