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Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Pit.


Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Print.

Top-quality? Good Gracious aren't you being a little pompous here? The top quality tentacles pick who they breed with. I mean literally pick who they breed with. If we force them to pick you, then they'll suicide and we will be left without top quality tentacles. If you want the top-quality one's then prepare yourself to flaunt or act to their wants. We'll give you the likes and dislikes of the top-quality one's but we can't force them to choose you.
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Print.

Objection on the repeated use of rouge where it should be rogue! *sits back down in the ranks*
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Print.

Completely voluntary through he's getting egg's implanted up his ass for being a male. That's the only way males can birth unless we do an expensive operation to which he has to pay for himself.

Is there any program that may help or endorse that? Like how some jobs help you pay for a masters, I can stay here and then in time..?
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Print.

Bah! You grammar nazi's are late! I should sue you for being late in correcting my grammar mishaps!
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Print.

I must say, I'm surprised I haven't been sued more. I mean, we almost all see ourselves as loner-types or maybe clashers, but I try to get along with people while being genuinely irritating.

So, I get no help on that sex thing huh?
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Print.

I must say, I'm surprised I haven't been sued more. I mean, we almost all see ourselves as loner-types or maybe clashers, but I try to get along with people while being genuinely irritating.

So, I get no help on that sex thing huh?

Wait...You want me the sole investor in my own ranch to pay for your transexual operation? Sure if you can get a womb from one of the female members. I wouldn't mind having a dick for a middle finger.
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Print.

Mr. Vesle, remind me not to visit your ranch if such an event happens.
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Print.

Mr. Vesle, remind me not to visit your ranch if such an event happens.

Scared I'll rape you with my middle finger? That would hurt too much Phoenix. I mean it wouldn't go that far in. By and by, Ms. Wallpaper, your wife, has asked you something. I can't seem to find it.... Toxic! Check the dictions if you will and tell me where Miss Wallpaper asked Phoenix for something.
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Pit.

My client had asked if she had to be impregnated by tentacles if she didn't sign your form. I'd say yes, they just would be someone elses tentacles.
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Pit.

Yes that is correct. Does Miss Wallpaper have any more complaints? Were already trying our damn best here trying to catch all the rogue tentacles out there. I mean we even have the "Gotta cage'em all" Logo up and running and having an anime about tentacle capturing and raping battles.

What more do you want us to do?
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Pit.

Well, I'd like to have weekends and evenings off of this whole birthing-of-monsters thing, if I'm not allowed to choose the cream of the crop... so to speak!

XD I'd also like some kind of salary for each monster birthed -- it'd be costing me time and energy to be used at your ranch, you know!
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Pit.

*Blinks and looks down at notes and looks up*

Wait....Were paying you? How? This contract is voluntary.... Besides with the start-up costs of the ranch so to speak, were still paying that debt off. Weekend you can have off. Evening erm, not so sure about. It usually takes 6 hours or so for birth after 3 days of gestation.. Fridays come in and get impregnated and spend a hell of a weekend and then give birth on monday? Also you can be paid monthly and recieve more, if, and only if you birth 3-5 tentacle monsters per month, the more you birth the higher the pay. Or would you rather be paid weekly upon birth?

Also @Toxic, we still need to discuss terms of board and why you want to ride more then 3 tentacles, because did you see How many do you not want to ride a day. You stated 3, so does that mean less or more?
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Pit.

I said I didn't want to ride 3 a day, I never said it's cuz I want to ride more. I can't accommodate more than 2 at a time, what with my being male And I figured I'd give room for an extra on weekends since I have more time.
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Pit.

Ah okay then Toxic. Let's see, since you want to ride 4 on weekdays, 3hours each for one tentacle, I don't want my employee's injuring themselves by overusing the tentacles. Hmmmm, well, if you keep up that much riding per day, you should be able to translocate yourself a womb and much estrogen in approx, 36 days. That's only under the best circumstances.
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Pit.

I swear, I have not touched Wallpaper or any other member as of yet. Don't look at me.... or my tentacles! I'm clean!

~The rogue TM
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Pit.

I swear, I have not touched Wallpaper or any other member as of yet. Don't look at me.... or my tentacles! I'm clean!

~The rogue TM

*Balif goes weewooing off with Officer Jenny to catch it*
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Pit.

Nuuuu! I'M A FREE TM!

*runs away*
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Pit.

I must say that my lawyer isn't doing much to help me iron out the details. XD But, well, lessee here. Everything LOOKS acceptable... though I'll need clarification on the 'how many do you not want to ride a day' clause.

Name: Wallpaper
Gender: Feeeeemale
How many do you not want to ride a day: I need more clarification by what this means. XD
Hip Size: I haven't measured in a while... enough to fill size 8/10 pantzors?
Bust Size: A
Healthiness: Everything checks out!
Favorite Tentacle: Start me off on the gentler ones. @.@ That rouge rogue was a bit too much of a menace for me to want to go wild!
Anal: Let's say no for now. XD

X____Wallpaper________ Please sign here.

Terms 1.0
I pledge not to sue the tentacle farm/ranch/breeding pit on the account of if I do, then I must give birth to an endless cycle of babies.
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Pit.

I must say that my lawyer isn't doing much to help me iron out the details. XD But, well, lessee here. Everything LOOKS acceptable... though I'll need clarification on the 'how many do you not want to ride a day' clause.

Name: Wallpaper
Gender: Feeeeemale
How many do you not want to ride a day: I need more clarification by what this means. XD
Hip Size: I haven't measured in a while... enough to fill size 8/10 pantzors?
Bust Size: A
Healthiness: Everything checks out!
Favorite Tentacle: Start me off on the gentler ones. @.@ That rouge rogue was a bit too much of a menace for me to want to go wild!
Anal: Let's say no for now. XD

X____Wallpaper________ Please sign here.

Terms 1.0
I pledge not to sue the tentacle farm/ranch/breeding pit on the account of if I do, then I must give birth to an endless cycle of babies.

How many do you not want to ride a day is the limit. We usually make you ride less then that amount unless you state otherwise.
 
Re: Fine print on Tentacle Farm/Ranch/Breeding Pit.

Let's say 3 max, if they take three hours each! Of course, if one impregnates me than I'd rather take the rest of the afternoon off to kick back and eat pickles and icecream, or whatever other craving comes along! :p
 
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